Because we're still favoring the masculine side of the coin. Hell, I've seen it in lesbian relationships. Binaries are your enemy.InsipidMadness said:
Violent women.
- Thread starter IrisEver
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Well, I can go on a spiel about gender roles and the culturally contingent values posited upon gendered individuals in a society, but I'd much rather give you a qualitative reply as a young (22) male.IrisEver said:
I personally approach women like I do with men. Not with some crude, gender-homogenized ideology, but with respect for every individual and their differences. This is not to say that I get along with everyone, but it allows me to better communicate and understand a person.
I'm personally attracted to strong women, who have wits and are assertive; free thinkers who are comfortable to develop their own personalities and not become trapped by social expectation. I also appreciate a woman who's able to step back and re-evaluate a position in case of error. Although I don't like undue and/or uncontrolled aggression, I like it when a woman stands up for herself and tells someone to go fuck themselves when the situation calls for it.
We are who we are. We should never need to conform to anothers ideal of 'normal' or 'proper'.
If someone can't accept you for who you are, then why should you respect their opinion if they can't respect your lifestyle.
If someone can't accept you for who you are, then why should you respect their opinion if they can't respect your lifestyle.
I don't like violent people of either gender. I have no desire to be around someone who gets angry and aggressive for no reason.
EDIT: And I find your particular brand of whining rather ridiculous. I do believe that there are strong societal gender roles that need to be knocked out of their place, but to most people, violence is a turn off, regardless of what genitals their partner has. You're blaming your romantic problems on sexism when it's just a naturally unpopular trait you possess.
EDIT: And I find your particular brand of whining rather ridiculous. I do believe that there are strong societal gender roles that need to be knocked out of their place, but to most people, violence is a turn off, regardless of what genitals their partner has. You're blaming your romantic problems on sexism when it's just a naturally unpopular trait you possess.
It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. As someone who has struggled greatly with " seeing red" for my entire life, I can tell you violence is not something to be taken lightly. People have a built in fight or flight response, and you never know when that can be set off. I never viewed violent tendencies as a " good thing", I was ashamed and embarrassed when people told me what I had done. I did not enjoy being called " slugger" and " tazmanian devil" after I had a defensive reflex reaction. These reactions were the complete opposite of my normal behavior, people were shocked when these things happened. Fostering violence rather than "redirecting it" is harmful to yourself and others. I am a very peitite female, was always an honors student, always laid back and a very happy, well adjusted personality and well liked. I was elected for positions in my class. I was a cheerleader until I broke another cheerleader's nose in one of these incidents. She touched me without gaining permission and I broke her nose. I have never instigated a fight, but if I was threatened, or I saw someone else being harmed, I did not think I didn;t even remember my actions. I just reacted, and often the only things I could remember were many events in my life that caused me a great deal of pain. It was uncontrollable, unrestrained pure rage.
The last incident I ever had was over 10 years ago. I was jumped by 3 girls much larger than me. I was only 98 lbs at the time, and the one who first attacked me was over 200lbs. I sent two of them to the hospital, and knocked my ex on the ground when he tried to pull me off of them. The last thing I remembered at all was being pushed into a fence. But apparently after that I knocked two teeth out of the girls mouth, broke her nose, black eyes, and was going to put my heel through her face when they tried to snap me out of it after I threw the girl on my back over a fence. This isn;t funny. This is very ugly. It is embarrassing and not something to be proud of. If they hadn't snapped me out of it, I could have killed someone. This is not "cool", it is horrifying.
From that point on, I realized it was a serious issue, and have removed all violence from my life. When I left my ex I promised myself I would never allow petty arguing or violence in my life again. I have learned to redirect frustration and anger into " positive energy" rather than just stomaching the pain until it explodes. A good way to do this is convert it into sexual energy, but not " violence". Sure some " roughness" is awesome, but nothing that would seriously hurt someone. My sweety now absolutely loves it. He starts complaining about something, and I just go bust out the toys pop on the porn and he forgets whatever he was a sniveling about. The first time I did that, he just sat there with his mouth open and disbelief on his face. It works so much better than arguing about things that don;t really matter in the long run. LOL
Instead of trying to focus on " maintaining violence" it is better to try to redirect it. Violence causes nothing but pain for everyone involved.
The last incident I ever had was over 10 years ago. I was jumped by 3 girls much larger than me. I was only 98 lbs at the time, and the one who first attacked me was over 200lbs. I sent two of them to the hospital, and knocked my ex on the ground when he tried to pull me off of them. The last thing I remembered at all was being pushed into a fence. But apparently after that I knocked two teeth out of the girls mouth, broke her nose, black eyes, and was going to put my heel through her face when they tried to snap me out of it after I threw the girl on my back over a fence. This isn;t funny. This is very ugly. It is embarrassing and not something to be proud of. If they hadn't snapped me out of it, I could have killed someone. This is not "cool", it is horrifying.
From that point on, I realized it was a serious issue, and have removed all violence from my life. When I left my ex I promised myself I would never allow petty arguing or violence in my life again. I have learned to redirect frustration and anger into " positive energy" rather than just stomaching the pain until it explodes. A good way to do this is convert it into sexual energy, but not " violence". Sure some " roughness" is awesome, but nothing that would seriously hurt someone. My sweety now absolutely loves it. He starts complaining about something, and I just go bust out the toys pop on the porn and he forgets whatever he was a sniveling about. The first time I did that, he just sat there with his mouth open and disbelief on his face. It works so much better than arguing about things that don;t really matter in the long run. LOL
Instead of trying to focus on " maintaining violence" it is better to try to redirect it. Violence causes nothing but pain for everyone involved.
Violence is poison. It isn;t a matter of "conforming for others" it is a matter of moving beyond a very bad habit. You do not become weak when you walk away from violence. You become strong.Asuka Soryu said:
If it is harmful to yourself and others, maybe you should reevaluate your addiction/ problem.
This was a hard lesson learned for me, as I described in my above post.