"Wait, how is that offensive?!"

[aei_haruko]

There are certain things that are just flat out rude. Sadly, some of us didn't get the memo and don't quite get the "why" of it. This is a thread for those situations. What is something people say is extremely offensive and you just don't get why? I'll start off with homosexuality as a choice. I never got why some people are so offended by it, who the hell cares about WHY you're gay?

So, what don't you get? Feel free to help clarify it for your fellow man too, but let's try to keep it civil, mkay?

TL;DR: Screw you, I just watched Big Picture

EDIT: Thanks to the folks who replied to this post. I guess what I really don't get is why it's offensive to say someone has a choice in the matter rather than saying they're a slave to genetics/upbringing/whatever. Using the 'choice' argument as an excuse for persecution is disgusting, but it's also bullshit. At the same time, I think it's fair to say there are certain people who just like being gay better than being straight, so I think we can all agree that everyone should just mind their own damn business.

I quote:
Hey, so'd ya go to the anime convention?
her:Nah, i went to church... a MORMAN church
say wat now/?why?
her:What.
What's wrong with Mormans? B[
..
oh nothing, I just didnt think you were morman ( had no clue what religeon you were quite frankly)

her:I'm Christian Born Baptist and Protestant
i figured
Her:But y'know
cool cool.
her:I like keeping an open mind,and going to adverse churches
I was born catholic, and I'm atheist.
her: and your closed-minded response is prompting me to leave.Good day..
Now what I dont get is what the hell happened here, did i say something offensive?

 

[DarklordKyo]

Well... to me is when i'm telling a joke or talking to someone and say black people. But my friends sush me up like i'm saying a racist word or something. Never understood why. Some people are black other white, i think it's a normal thing.

When i was a kid i kinda thinked people would be offended when i said the term "Black" to refer to a person, but a friend of mine, wich was black, saied he would feel more offended if i didn't use the word, considering there would be a racist connection by not using a common and normal word.

So yeah...

I don't get why the word "black" is considered offensive especially compared to the far less sensitive "African American" which I consider to be extremely presumptive. Of all the black people who live in the U.S. I know they aren't all originally from Africa and yet the term 'African American' implies just that. While it's true that their family may have originated from the continent, many people who are referred to as such weren't just born in the U.S, their parents, grandparents and, further generations back were also born American.

Other than that...I haven't really got anything. Well, other than PETA being upset by the Tanooki Suit but not giving a flip before now such as when Mario donned the Frog or Penguin suit...or how he's been stomping on turtles and using their hallowed out shells as weapons since the mid/late 80's...or how he's mistreated/abused Donkey Kong since the early 80's

Not to mention that there are people that're african, but apparently aren't allowed to be called african just because they're not black. An example of these types of individuals is Charlize Theron (then again, she might be allowed to be called such and I'm just an idiot, just gotta wait till someone either clarifies or flames).

 

[Mischa87]

Since when does the homosexual community get to dictate what a word means and how it can be used? Last I checked, gay = happy. I can understand if your pissed off about the whole "no homo" phrase, but don't tell me how to use a word that had nothing to do with any form of sexuality in its original usage.

Misdirected rage much?

Language evolves, and so, gay has a different meaning than it did, deal with it.

And FYI, the changing of the definition wasn't even done by gay people, it was done by the people who write the linguistic style guides way back in the 19th century, so get your facts straight before you jump down someone's throat.

Also, I am not a member of the homosexual or gay communities, I'm female for one, and am pansexual, so grouping me like that is presumptuous and ignorant. (Also, Mischa is a female name, derp)

Now go play with the other sheep.

 

[chowderface]

I don't quite follow "monkey=black person". Like, I get that it's a slur, I accept that it's a slur, I just don't get why monkey in particular.

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Humbug.

Back in the day when that story was written, that was the F word of the day.

 

[Mischa87]

christ your a pretentious jerk, you know that? You want people to understand and agree with you? How about you quit treating everybody as your enemy?

Btw I have used the word gay when I didn't like something before, and guess what? I do NOT hate/want to hurt/wish death upon any homosexual/bisexual/transgender/pansexual person, but thanks for ignorantly labeling me as such.

Actually, no, I don't treat everybody as if they were my enemy, I attempt to educate ignorant people about things they don't understand, and if they spew hate, I stand up for my rights as a human being.

And by using "gay" in a negative context, you are in fact being homophobic, you're implying that it's bad/wrong to be gay.

Also, you're being a hypocrite, you said in a previous post it meant it meant happy... then why were you using it in a negative context?

Fail troll is fail.

 

[Helmholtz Watson]

christ your a pretentious jerk, you know that? You want people to understand and agree with you? How about you quit treating everybody as your enemy?

Btw I have used the word gay when I didn't like something before, and guess what? I do NOT hate/want to hurt/wish death upon any homosexual/bisexual/transgender/pansexual person, but thanks for ignorantly labeling me as such.

Actually, no, I don't treat everybody as if they were my enemy, I attempt to educate ignorant people about things they don't understand, and if they spew hate, I stand up for my rights as a human being.

And by using "gay" in a negative context, you are in fact being homophobic, you're implying that it's bad/wrong to be gay.

Also, you're being a hypocrite, you said in a previous post it meant it meant happy... then why were you using it in a negative context?

Fail troll is fail.

It does mean happy. I'm using it in the slang form.
How does my use of grammar indicate a fear of homosexuals? I know homosexual people and I have no fear about them. They are just regular people like you and I. Their sexuality isn't something for me to fear. So no, I'm not homophobic nor am I a troll, but thanks for ignorantly labeling me as such.

Btw take a look at this site:
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/gay

 

[bluegate]

Nah it's not. It's the actual word itself, without even an insulting meaning to it. In common-wording, people can say: "ik donderde van de trap", which means: "I fell off the staircase" (fell being the translation of donderde, which is the "evil" word). I said that word to a colleague the other day in a non-offensive way but she didn't appreciate it and ignore me for the day.

It is all in the context. I doubt that any person, christian or not would take offense to the actual word 'donder', it is the way you use it that people are offended by. For example, in the example you gave yourself, the word actually does come across as slightly abrasive. "Ik donderde van de trap" would translate to "I fell down the fucking stairs" (or "I fucking fell down the stairs", whatever suits your fancy) in English.

I don't know if you haven't noticed yet, but in Dutch, people that want to sound tough often use 'out-of-context' words instead of normal verbs in their sentences. And in general, people that do this are considered as 'rude','rednecky' or 'childish'. In English, it'd be almost the same as using the word 'damn', 'fuck' and what have you, every 4 or 5 words in English.

As with the Smurfs, the Dutch language has a high tolerance for changing words around, although unlike the Smurfs, where using the word 'smurf' for just about any verb or noun is normal, when doing it in Dutch, be weary of the extra meaning you are adding to your sentence when doing so.

 

[Helmholtz Watson]

christ your a pretentious jerk, you know that? You want people to understand and agree with you? How about you quit treating everybody as your enemy?

Btw I have used the word gay when I didn't like something before, and guess what? I do NOT hate/want to hurt/wish death upon any homosexual/bisexual/transgender/pansexual person, but thanks for ignorantly labeling me as such.

Actually, no, I don't treat everybody as if they were my enemy, I attempt to educate ignorant people about things they don't understand, and if they spew hate, I stand up for my rights as a human being.

And by using "gay" in a negative context, you are in fact being homophobic, you're implying that it's bad/wrong to be gay.

Also, you're being a hypocrite, you said in a previous post it meant it meant happy... then why were you using it in a negative context?

Fail troll is fail.

It does mean happy. I'm using it in the slang form.
How does my use of grammar indicate a fear of homosexuals? I know homosexual people and I have no fear about them. They are just regular people like you and I. Their sexuality isn't something for me to fear. So no, I'm not homophobic nor am I a troll, but thanks for ignorantly labelling me as such.

Btw take a look at this site:
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/gay

But you raged at me for supposedly dictating the development of the English language, so clearly language is static and cannot change according to you, which means one can't use slang... Dude... give it up, you're trolling, and you've used the stupidest defence I've even seen homophobes use. The old "I really meant it's happy... yeah..."

Troll harder boy, troll harder!

And again you label me as homophobic. Stop dodging the question and tell me how my choice in words equates to me having a fear of homosexuals. I have clearly stated that homosexuals are regular people, not someone to fear/hate. Yet you continue to tell me that I'm afraid of them. Please tell me where my fear is coming from, because I wasn't aware of the "fact" that I fear/hate homosexuals. Also, why do you continue to call me a troll? Are you really that convinced that I can't being expressing my true opinion?

 

[Thaa'ir]

Well, there was the time I used the phrase "in Catholic mythology" in my Arabic class...it took me a full thirty seconds to realize that I had just said something bad.

 

[Dawns Gate]

If everyone is supposed to be treated equally why is it that when a mentally handicapped person is a complete dick, people take their side. I tell them off and all of a sudden I'm the bad guy, I wasn't the one throwing rocks and threatening a kid.

 

[Liquid Paradox]

But really, you clearly don't get it at all if you think there's a choice involved. If someone likes being gay over being straight it's because they're gay in the first place. That or they're bisexual and confusing themselves into thinking they have to pick one or the other.

Nawp.

As a Bisexual Male with a strong preference towards other Males, I can safely say that this is simply not true. I am Not gay. Nor am I confused. I know that I am attracted to women, because... well, because I'm attracted to women. Personality wise, however, there are many female traits that I find imposable to deal with, and therefore, I choose not to.

Incidentally, "boyish" girls, like tom-boys, or girls with shaved heads, turn me on greatly. On the other side of the equation, I prefer more effeminate men, as opposed to muscly, hairy ones. Essentially, I like sexually ambiguous types =D Even still, I will usually choose a girly dude over a tom-boy.

I suppose the point I am trying to make here is that saying that there is never a choice involved is just as incorrect as saying that there is always a choice involved. People try to separate human beings onto one side or the other, but where does that leave people with a more ambiguous sexuality?

 

[Nazulu]

About 7 years ago (I think), I was finishing of my oral assignment in my IT class. At the end of the power point, I had a picture with a couple of Arabs holding firearms with speech bubble saying "we'll steal your computer" (as a poor joke). My teacher was offended and suddenly became loud and abusive.

I think I can understand that now, but back then I knew nothing of Arabs, Muslims, any past events and wars in history and what not. I just grabbed the first picture with bad asses on it in Google.

Was I being racist/offensive? I still don't know. I was left in shock cause I didn't know what the hell happened so I haven't brought it up till now.

 

[cheese_wizington]

Two hipsters got in a car accident and they were fine. I made a hipster joke and everyone went AWW GAWWD WHAT A DICK.

And they didn't even LIKE those people either!

 

[Lineoutt]

I'm not sure why people find curse words offensive, because haven't we been taught as kids that "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."?

sorry if there is already a response to this buuuut...

Because words do hurt and that saying is wrong. True, words themselves like "the" and "it" and "n*gger c*nt" (can you get blocked for language?) as simple phonetic devices are boring and non painful one must look at the person who says these words. That angry, betrayed, disgusted, mocking look that your friend gives you while calling you a whore shows that words are more than just phonetics, its the meaning, the intention of the other person that hurts. Words are just a way to convey that.

 

[Some_weirdGuy]

And again you label me as homophobic. Stop dodging the question and tell me how my choice in words equates to me having a fear of homosexuals. I have clearly stated that homosexuals are regular people, not someone to fear/hate. Yet you continue to tell me that I'm afraid of them. Please tell me where my fear is coming from, because I wasn't aware of the "fact" that I fear/hate homosexuals. Also, why do you continue to call me a troll? Are you really that convinced that I can't being expressing my true opinion?

Perhaps you should learn the meaning of homophobia instead of spewing 'but i'm not scared of homosexuals' over and over?
Literally the first result in google:

Homophobia is a term used to refer to a range of negative attitudes and feelings towards lesbian, gay and in some cases bisexual, transgender people and behavior, although these are usually covered under other terms such as biphobia and transphobia. Definitions refer to irrational fear, with the implication of antipathy, contempt, prejudice, and aversion. The term "homophobia" is observable in critical and hostile behavior such as discrimination and violence on the basis of a perceived homosexual or in some cases any non-heterosexual orientation. In a 1998 address, author, activist, and civil rights leader Coretta Scott King stated that "Homophobia is like racism and anti-Semitism and other forms of bigotry in that it seeks to dehumanize a large group of people, to deny their humanity, their dignity and personhood."

Associate homosexuality as a bad thing, you're displaying homophobia. Pretty simple.

 

[Gnarynhar]

Inquiring about people's real life disabilities and being told that there is nothing wrong with them and that by saying that there is being bigoted. Jesus!

Now that's just stupid. (and I'm speaking as someone on disability support) What's next, arguing that people in wheelchairs don't need ramp access since "there's nothing wrong with them"?

I got called out for saying "Jew" once. If you're Jewish and you practice Judaism, then you are a Jew. Just because you conjugate a word a certain way does not make it offensive, especially if you're using it correctly. Also, what should we say if not "black?"

?! Next thing you know you'll get called out for calling the Pope Catholic.......

What I find offensive is people who insist that if someone is depressed that they should just "shut up and cheer up" or "stop complaining and smile you stupid emo!" Or, you know, people talking about mental illness as though it's something you can choose to have and that it's all in a person's head, that they're making it up to get attention, etc.

Thank you. Somebody actually walked up and asked me if I'd ever "just tried being happy" the other day. Long story short, I've been suspended from school.

Oh so much agreement with that I couldn't state it enough. I'm severely OCD, I barely leave my little granny flat in the backyard, and I can't even hug my dogs.
Back when I was in high school, I was suspended once, my 'peers' were total assholes and the teachers totally ineffectual. The suspension was more like a reward than anything else.

mines one i know is offensive,

Which begs the question "Then why do you keep doing it?!"

but as a product of my generation i use gay as a negative connotation, such as "thats gay" not because i dislike gay people, just because in my developing years it was a popular go-to phrase that just stuck with me.

Well there is the fact that you're perpetuating the idea that being gay is wrong. But there's also the fact that they should be annoyed because using it makes you an immature little tit.

I get that its wrong, but the thing that bugs me is that people can't get that im not doing it on purpose,

Unless you have tourette's, some sort of split personality, or some other phenomena that gives you the ability to talk without any conscious direction, than you are doing it on purpose.

I never knew "coon" was supposedly a racial slur against blacks until WoW took out the Maine Coon minipet. (Which is an outrage, btw, Maine Coon is a legitimate and most awesome breed of cat, they shoulda told whoever complained to fuck right off)

Considering the Maine Coon was named for either a myth that they came from crossbreeding with raccoons, or from descending from the ship's cats of a Captain Charles Coon, we'd better rename the breed to it's alternate name of Wapoton, rename the raccoon, and have the good captain's surname posthumously changed too.
Oh and hey, it's the <a href=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maine_Coon>State Cat of Maine too. Well, there's a state that's in a lot of trouble.
Or, considering all the <a href=http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/coon>meanings of the word coon, a number of people could get a life and stop introducing people to a racial slur that they've never heard of and preempting all the other inoffensive meanings of the word.

When people are boring you on the phone by going on and on about nothing important. I don't see why its rude to just tell them to get to the point. My ex-girlfriend used to call me and talk about a sandwich she ate that day, or some stupid shirt that she bought. She would go on and on about some stupid little thing. I got sick of just agreeing with her and I told her to get to the point. She was pissed off, but so what, its a waste of freaking time.

While it may be the way you ask them to get to the point, there is the fact that either she seems incapable of prioritizing, or she seems to think you have nothing but free time (which could count as an insult on her part).
Still, someone calling about something and then going on and on about nothing important or related to the issue is really annoying. If it's just a call to do some socializing and catching up with a friend or family, it's a little different.

Well, there was the time I used the phrase "in Catholic mythology" in my Arabic class...it took me a full thirty seconds to realize that I had just said something bad.

The fact that people find that offensive is the offensive part.

If everyone is supposed to be treated equally why is it that when a mentally handicapped person is a complete dick, people take their side. I tell them off and all of a sudden I'm the bad guy, I wasn't the one throwing rocks and threatening a kid.

I... I'm kinda speechless here. Telling someone off for throwing rocks and threatening a kid is wrong now? A mental handicap isn't an excuse, hell, it makes it more important that that person learns what they're doing is wrong. And if they're so handicapped that they can't possibly comprehend that, what were they doing out unsupervised enough to be in that position anyway?!

 

[Darkmantle]

christ your a pretentious jerk, you know that? You want people to understand and agree with you? How about you quit treating everybody as your enemy?

Btw I have used the word gay when I didn't like something before, and guess what? I do NOT hate/want to hurt/wish death upon any homosexual/bisexual/transgender/pansexual person, but thanks for ignorantly labeling me as such.

Actually, no, I don't treat everybody as if they were my enemy, I attempt to educate ignorant people about things they don't understand, and if they spew hate, I stand up for my rights as a human being.

And by using "gay" in a negative context, you are in fact being homophobic, you're implying that it's bad/wrong to be gay.

Also, you're being a hypocrite, you said in a previous post it meant it meant happy... then why were you using it in a negative context?

Fail troll is fail.

I suppose saying something is retarded makes me afraid of the mentally challenged.

I suppose saying something is stupid makes me an intellectual elitist

I suppose using crippled in a metaphor shows my lack of sensitivity to the disabled.

I suppose saying something is black (like my cat)is being insensitive to African Americans

I suppose saying something is shitty exposes my deep fear of bathrooms

I suppose saying something is f---ed up makes me cripplingly afraid of sex.

I suppose making assumptions sounds really stupid.