I had originally posted this in another thread of a similar question but I guess it warrants its own thread for now. Copy pasted the text I posted too, let me know if I am too vague somewhere.
Right now the state is that of her ignoring me, after telling me to fuck off a few times when I tried to be nice and reasonable to her. So we stopped talking, and haven't talked in about a month now. As far as moving on, I would say I'm good in that department. There is one thing that gets at me though...and that's just closure, I guess. Thing is, we were reeeeeeeally good friends, and we met each other when she started working at the grocery store I had been working at for two years. Eventually we became good friends, and by coincidence I ended up mentoring her in everything I had learned, so we really developed a bond that went past a simple friendship. And for two years after just that, we were good friends, with only a few on-off moments of 'discontent' with each other.
I guess the important catch here is that we never actually went out. At the time I met her she was in a long-standing relationship, but I think it's safe to label that as shaky, at best. And after we really started to hit it off as friends, we both made it pretty clear that we were attracted to each other...mind you, I was very careful not to come off as trying to steal her from her boyfriend or anything. I wouldn't do anything to anyone that I wouldn't want done upon myself. But eventually her relationship did come to an end, and it seemed very likely we might, at the very least, date somewhat soon afterward. And in fact, we almost did. I told her I was visiting my family for the weekend, on a trip down from the University I am at, and her birthday was a few days after that weekend. So I asked to take her out as a birthday gift, from me to her. Well, she cancelled it virtually last minute, and I kinda found myself stuck at home thinking I had a night to spend with her but instead with nothing to do. But that was easy to cope with, just a slightly more boring weekend than I had planned on. When her actual birthday came around though, and I wished her a happy birthday, I got quite the cold shoulder, about a step away from telling me to fuck off. Which she did...three days later. So little after a week where we were going on a date we were both excited for and she does this shit, and I eventually find out she is dating (and now in a relationship with) a guy from our old workplace who is literally 10 years older than her.
Now from my standpoint, I cannot see how she would justify building up our relationship to that point only to crash and burn it so quickly and suddenly. I stopped trying to speculate on her reasons for this but I can't help but think now if she maybe regrets being harsh about it...which I think is putting it mildly at best, but that's just my standpoint, however bias it sounds. At the very least, even if she truly hates my guts now, I can't see us going on with the rest of our lives without saying another word to each other, we were such good friends and to let all that go with a simple "Fuck off" just doesn't seem like how it will really end someday. I guess I can't decide whether to look forward to even the most bitter closure on it possible, or put it all behind and never think of it again. Honestly, I can do either. I feel fine, just a bit confused I guess.
Right now the state is that of her ignoring me, after telling me to fuck off a few times when I tried to be nice and reasonable to her. So we stopped talking, and haven't talked in about a month now. As far as moving on, I would say I'm good in that department. There is one thing that gets at me though...and that's just closure, I guess. Thing is, we were reeeeeeeally good friends, and we met each other when she started working at the grocery store I had been working at for two years. Eventually we became good friends, and by coincidence I ended up mentoring her in everything I had learned, so we really developed a bond that went past a simple friendship. And for two years after just that, we were good friends, with only a few on-off moments of 'discontent' with each other.
I guess the important catch here is that we never actually went out. At the time I met her she was in a long-standing relationship, but I think it's safe to label that as shaky, at best. And after we really started to hit it off as friends, we both made it pretty clear that we were attracted to each other...mind you, I was very careful not to come off as trying to steal her from her boyfriend or anything. I wouldn't do anything to anyone that I wouldn't want done upon myself. But eventually her relationship did come to an end, and it seemed very likely we might, at the very least, date somewhat soon afterward. And in fact, we almost did. I told her I was visiting my family for the weekend, on a trip down from the University I am at, and her birthday was a few days after that weekend. So I asked to take her out as a birthday gift, from me to her. Well, she cancelled it virtually last minute, and I kinda found myself stuck at home thinking I had a night to spend with her but instead with nothing to do. But that was easy to cope with, just a slightly more boring weekend than I had planned on. When her actual birthday came around though, and I wished her a happy birthday, I got quite the cold shoulder, about a step away from telling me to fuck off. Which she did...three days later. So little after a week where we were going on a date we were both excited for and she does this shit, and I eventually find out she is dating (and now in a relationship with) a guy from our old workplace who is literally 10 years older than her.
Now from my standpoint, I cannot see how she would justify building up our relationship to that point only to crash and burn it so quickly and suddenly. I stopped trying to speculate on her reasons for this but I can't help but think now if she maybe regrets being harsh about it...which I think is putting it mildly at best, but that's just my standpoint, however bias it sounds. At the very least, even if she truly hates my guts now, I can't see us going on with the rest of our lives without saying another word to each other, we were such good friends and to let all that go with a simple "Fuck off" just doesn't seem like how it will really end someday. I guess I can't decide whether to look forward to even the most bitter closure on it possible, or put it all behind and never think of it again. Honestly, I can do either. I feel fine, just a bit confused I guess.
