What if...

[Fasckira]

I'd use to lock every door I came across. Far more amusing, and possibly not illegal either.

 

[Overusedname]

Use a lot of metaphors to get away with knowing anything and do whatever I want.

You wouldn't happen to be referencing the philosophy of your avatar now would you?

 

[Casual Shinji]

Nothing really.

I'd still be trespassing, and would most likely get caught and go to jail. And I'm too delicate for that environment.

Maybe I'd unlock the secrets to the universe, if there happens to be an actual "door" for that.

BUT DUDE YOU HAVE THE KEY YOU CAN JUST WALK OUT OF JAIL!!!!!!

Wouldn't the key get taken away along with every other personal item when I get processed or whatever? Plus, even if I did manage to hide it in some orifice and used it to escape, I'd still get like shoot on sight or have the dogs sicked on me. Lot of good a key is gonna do me then.

I assume that the key is bound to you. You use it to sneak into the guardrooms, take one of the uniforms and name tags, and then walk out the front door.

This is assuming I'm good at sneaking.

I suppose I could simply unlock every cell door and try to escape in the ensuing chaos. I'd still probably get randomly shived though.

 

[Froggy Slayer]

So it's like a quest item or something?

Yes, I assume.

I suppose I could simply unlock every cell door and try to escape in the ensuing chaos. I'd still probably get randomly shived though.

It's better to take that chance than to spend your days rotting in prison.

 

[RyQ_TMC]

Seeing this thread and recently rewatching Operation Dumbo Drop gives me ideas for all sorts of elephant-themed hijinks.

 

[DoPo]

Nothing really.

I'd still be trespassing, and would most likely get caught and go to jail. And I'm too delicate for that environment.

Maybe I'd unlock the secrets to the universe, if there happens to be an actual "door" for that.

BUT DUDE YOU HAVE THE KEY YOU CAN JUST WALK OUT OF JAIL!!!!!!

Wouldn't the key get taken away along with every other personal item when I get processed or whatever? Plus, even if I did manage to hide it in some orifice and used it to escape, I'd still get like shoot on sight or have the dogs sicked on me. Lot of good a key is gonna do me then.

I assume that the key is bound to you. You use it to sneak into the guardrooms, take one of the uniforms and name tags, and then walk out the front door.

So it's like a quest item or something?

Duh, isn't it obvious? It's the Skeleton Key from the Elder Scrolls universe.

 

[Giftfromme]

You got your hands on a key that can open any door and lock. What would you do?

You funny guy!!!! Tell me more jokes for my own amusement please

 

[DoPo]

Nothing really.

I'd still be trespassing, and would most likely get caught and go to jail. And I'm too delicate for that environment.

Maybe I'd unlock the secrets to the universe, if there happens to be an actual "door" for that.

BUT DUDE YOU HAVE THE KEY YOU CAN JUST WALK OUT OF JAIL!!!!!!

Wouldn't the key get taken away along with every other personal item when I get processed or whatever? Plus, even if I did manage to hide it in some orifice and used it to escape, I'd still get like shoot on sight or have the dogs sicked on me. Lot of good a key is gonna do me then.

I assume that the key is bound to you. You use it to sneak into the guardrooms, take one of the uniforms and name tags, and then walk out the front door.

So it's like a quest item or something?

Duh, isn't it obvious? It's the Skeleton Key from the Elder Scrolls universe.

That *was* my first thought on reading this thread. And from an earlier post I saw I wasn't the only one XD

Yeah. But now think about it - if it's the Skeleton Key and a quest item, then you're in TES. Which means that you have to realise you're not actually real to achieve CHIM. And try not to erase yourself from existence. So, once you go past that, you are basically on par with a TES protagonist.

What you need to do now is go and pick any door you come across. Do this exclusively for a couple of days or so and you wouldn't need the Skeleton key any more. You can get lockpicks from Amazon. It's now safe to return it to Nocturnal, since she wouldn't be happy if it's missing (it's a quest item, remember) and I'd personally prefer to stay on the good side of gods.

Oh, yes, also gods would apparently exist. Or Daedra, whatever, same thing pretty much. Next item on the list - GO FIND SHEOGORATH! Hell yeah! Since he's a badass with scottish accent, I'll start the search from Sean Connery. It's probably him anyway. So, try to get the Wabbajack from him - do his quest probably.

So here's when the fun stuff starts - go somewhere -> use Wabbajack -> have fun.

Well, that's my plan anyway. Dunno about you. But the actual question in this thread is, in fact, "what if you were a TES protagonist?" - what would you do then.

 

[SlaveNumber23]

Probably sell it, I have no use for it.

 

[Goofguy]

I probably wouldn't change a damn thing I do. I don't have any superpowers, just a master key. Unlocking other people's houses or offices will still get me arrested.

Would be sweet to have though as it would eliminate the need for the 10 keys I have on my key chain at the moment.

 

[Judgement101]

Sell it for a lot of money. Seriously, if you aren't invisible you can't really sneak into anything and you can't steal anything due to security systems.

 

[DugMachine]

Unlock this damn safe my great grandfather left behind...

captcha: taco tueday - DAMMIT I was meaning to get tacos today... guess not.

 

[LauriJ]

Nothing really.

I'd still be trespassing, and would most likely get caught and go to jail. And I'm too delicate for that environment.

Maybe I'd unlock the secrets to the universe, if there happens to be an actual "door" for that.

That's why you need to do it when no one's looking...

 

[frizzlebyte]

Stick the key in people I dislike and unlock their death.
Duh.

And get a really really sweet car.

That made me lol.

I've always wanted to go behind the "staff only" doors at the mall, just to see what's back there. I'd probably not be the best steward of that kind of power.

 

[Fappy]

I would get rid of my key chain... won't be needing that bulky piece of shit anymore!

 

[SD-Fiend]

is it a key blade? if not then I'd just put it in a box until i needed it.

 

[conanthegamer]

Everyone would get to find out how honorable you(or me) really is. Locks aren't meant to keep you out, there meant to keep you honest. If you really want into most places you'll find a way in. Except maybe Area 51, NORAD or someplace like it.

 

[Flamezdudes]

Troll people by locking doors everywhere and unlocking secret ones.

Eh... I dunno...

 

[mattttherman3]

My family has a mail box slot in a mailbox with many boxes for mail. So I will use that key and mix up everyones mail, I will do this DAILY, I will make the news as the Mailbox Mixer, and I will have some dreadful costume. Many mailmen will undoubtedly be blamed and fired, but this is as it should be because it must be, for I am THE MAILBOX MIXER MUHUHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Then I will up my game, I will go to random parking lots and move cars around, I will be known as the Car Mixer. Undoubtedly, many vallets will be fired, but this is as it should be because it must be, for I am THE CAR MIXER MUHUHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I am the Hero my city Needs, but not the one it deserves.

 

[chiggerwood]

Pick out a random person and every once in a while break into their house, leave them a random easily obtainable object, and watch them slowly lose their minds, and when they finally leave the state follow them wait a little bit, do it again, and watch the ensuing mental breakdown.