What is your favorite insult?

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Harkonnen64

New member
Jul 14, 2010
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"You cock-ass! You know what a cock-ass is? It's a person who spends too much time with COCK in their AAAASSSSS!!!" That or, "You never watched/played/read [X]? What, didn't your parents love you?"
 

Dead Seerius

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Feb 4, 2012
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Laugh at them. Seriously, just laugh like something about them is absolutely hilarious. It'll piss them off to the point of them looking stupid. If they ask why you're laughing, laugh harder, that is unless of course you're a bad actor.
 

Moonlight Butterfly

Be the Leaf
Mar 16, 2011
6,157
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'Fathead' sometimes pronounced 'Fatheed' with emphasis on the heed. Which means someone is being stupid or slow.

My grandad used to say it to people a lot so my family pretty much mimics his voice (northern English accent) and we insult each other with it.

Good times.
 

Monkeybald

New member
Nov 13, 2010
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"You act like somebody took a shit down your chimney!"

Not so much an insult, but the mental picture makes me laugh.
 

bliebblob

Plushy wrangler, die-curious
Sep 9, 2009
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When joking:
YOU MISERABLE FAT BELGIAN BASTARDS
Because it's so deliciously random.

Can't remember where I got it from.

When someone is genuinly raging at me: ... *long pause* ... your parents never hug you do they?
Seems to catch em off guard usually.
 
Oct 12, 2011
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I have a few. My favorite was invented by a friend when she just called a fellow "Single-helix mouth-breather"

I have used "Limp-dick dog-fucker" when suffering from road-rage.

"May you suffer an unfortunate incident involving a barbed dildo," is another old favorite.

When younger, I used to use "Go get a blowjob from a lawnmower!"

But currently, my favorite is, "Fuck you, the horse you rode in one, the blacksmith that shoe-ed it, and his entire goddamned family!"

The only one I regret was telling someone who had angered me almost to the point of violence was, "You are a mistake of nature I can correct."
 

kouriichi

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Sep 5, 2010
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I have to say "Dicktits" from one of my all time favorite games, Bulletstorm, takes the cake.

Maybe "Fungal-Rimjob". They both draw the same amount of ire from people, so i use them both liberally.
 

C F

New member
Jan 10, 2012
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I... Huh.
Yeah, reading through this thread, I realized I haven't actually insulted anyone in a long while. There's really no point to it.

When I was younger, my favorites were 'idiot' and 'moron'. Now I've taken up simply chuckling to myself (or facepalming) at displays of sheer stupidity. No overt insults, though.
 

Johnny Reb

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Sep 12, 2010
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whenever my friends make a homophobic comment i usally just call then a no good Straighty McStraighterson
 

Kyoh

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Oct 12, 2010
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You are a festering cyst on the lowest sphincter of humanity.

Of course we also have: cock-monger, dick weed, Rumple-Foreskin, cum guzzler, and spunk-for-brains.
 

Imperius

New member
Sep 13, 2010
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Johnny Reb said:
whenever my friends make a homophobic comment i usally just call then a no good Straighty McStraighterson
Huh weird....When my friends make a homophilic comment I call them a no good Gayie McGayerson
 

hyzaku

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Mar 1, 2010
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I'm sorry, I'm afraid I subscribe to the theory of intellectual osmosis. As such, I must now cease our conversation and move away from you before my intelligence begins to drop. Good day.
 

Dr Bodom

New member
Feb 6, 2012
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My usual threat is "I'll shiv you in the kidneys"
I'm also know to say "eat fuck" a fair bit too.
 

Loki_Blackaria

New member
Oct 8, 2008
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I'm a fan of,
"Oh Christ, look at this winner."
Or,
"You ever try reading the paper instead of sleeping under it?"
I know I stole that last one from somewhere, but I can't remember where..

...and in a pinch, "Insipid fuckwit" has always done well for me.
 

Twilight_guy

Sight, Sound, and Mind
Nov 24, 2008
7,131
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"Your mother wears army boots!"

I enjoy it because it's less offensive so much as confusing.
 

Tanis

The Last Albino
Aug 30, 2010
5,262
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It depends how much they've irked me - though I do enjoy being downright horrid...

1) You're the reason why I'm Pro-Choice.

2) It's people like you that make me long for wire hangers and time machines.

3) Baka (it's Japanese for idiot and most folks don't get it so they go away confused)

4) Dumbass (a classic)

5) *to a female* - Do me a favor and don't be like your mom, put the heroin and booze down when you get preggers

6) *to a male* - Do the world a favor, cut off your balls so you don't accidentally breed.

7) If I was a Christian I'd tell you to go to hell, because I'm not I'll ask that you go look in the mirror for a few hours.

8) So YOU'RE the reason why 'They' hate us for our freedom, GREAT.