What would you do if Jesus turned out to be real and came back?

[Nenad]

'Cause he ain't that that bad of a fella, I'd be happy.

 

[00slash00]

probably go to hell

 

[Jimmybobjr]

Probably burn in hell for eternity for not beliving in him.

 

[FalloutJack]

What would I do? Give the man a high-five. I think the second coming deserves that much.

 

[Maphysto]

Sit down with him and talk philosophy. Find out exactly how much of his message in the Bible was true and how much was twisted by the Christians.

 

[Vindictus]

In all honesty, I think Jesus would be executed by the right for being 'the antichrist'/'false prophet'.

 

[LamAnd]

I would invite him to smoke a joint with me and discuss why people misunderstand simple things like love your next!

 

[Exocet]

Give him a sandwich,tell him to duplicate it like he said he did back then.Well,ok,he did it with bread,but a sandwich is bread with stuff inside so I'm sure he could manage.

If he succeeds,give him the 2 sandwiches and ask him to duplicate those.Repeat until I solve world hunger,then proceed to buy a lake and ask my new-found business partner to change the lake water into wine.

From there,I have unlimited food and a lake filled with booze.The world finally has enough food to feed everyone and new sandwich-fuel power stations are developed.
Peace on Earth is achieved thanks to the power of a glorious bacon sandwich.

 

[Ammutseba]

I'd tell him his dad is an asshat and that his religion is evil.

 

[Vykrel]

i would probably scold him.

 

[Richardplex]

I'd be like "Sup Jesus, I think you're a pretty sick guy and I have nothing but respect for you, shame your father is a bit of a c*** though". And then, if I go to hell for all eternity for 18-70 years of neutrality, I could be like "told you so, he really is a massive prick" to my christian friends.

Oh, and I'd love to discuss theology and philosophy with the guy.

For those who think atheists would burn him at the stake, I'd guess they share my opinion and would burn his father, but not Jesus. None of my atheist friends dislike Jesus at all.

 

[imanerd000]

Christians would kill the guy before he could even start anything serious.

 

[blankedboy]

Erm.

Jesus was a legitimate person. He was real.

.-.

 

[Woodsey]

Ask him how a long-haired hippy spawned so many retarded right-wing followers.

And then I'd ask why his Dad's such a fucking narcissist.

 

[Synek]

"So about some your fans ... "

 

[ParkourMcGhee]

"If you meet your ___ on the road, kill him."

So I'd go for a headshot or something. World's not ready for another 'saviour' yet anyway.

 

[Glademaster_v1legacy]

Ok seriously people this and some threads among others aren't real threads and are more joke threads. This thread and the other like last X,Y and Z are all more suited to the Forum Games and R&P sections I am getting increasingly annoyed seeing these types of threads popping up again and again. Hell this is even more suited to Religion and Politics.

snip

Oh just grow up and stop flamebaiting and stirring shit up.

OT: I suppose I would chew on his arm to get me the blood and body of Christ in its undiluted form.

 

[StormShaun]

I would be like.

Me: I knew it already, lets go Jesus!

and so I went to Heven and became a Lightning Angel.

Good enough.