What would you say to the past "you"?

[Zantos]

It depends on the causal effect. I mean, I'd like to give my younger self good advice, but sometimes I think back and would like to give him a good slap. The problem being is that although I'd like him to learn from verbal lessons, does the effect cancel out if I start slapping him repeatedly. But assuming I could just tell a 16 year old me.

1) Stop being a dick to people, in particular stop saying other subjects are lesser. Prick.
2)-5) General relationship advice, roughly covering how not to ask someone out and reassuring that someone that hits you and says they love you is lying.
6) *Backhand across the right cheek*
7) The Clare incident
8) Just put the effort in to the things you enjoy, in particular if the things you enjoy are regarded as essential subjects so have a shit load of funding.

That kind of covers it. Anything else I have incorporated far much to try altering.

 

[Clowndoe]

"You were born trash and you'll be lucky if you grow up to be garbage."

I'd then slash my bike tires and go home.

 

[Vault101]

22

to my past self

MY GOD....your such a dumbass...how the hel did you manage to not staple your ID to your forhead?

You're gay? Just don't show signs of pedophilia or you will get moderated! Just warning you though.

....dude...

what the fuck?

no seriously what the fuck?

If you were trying to ask if "you're gay, and you have sex with a woman, are you still gay?", the answer would depend on if the man in question enjoyed it. If he did, and wants to do it again, he was likely never completely gay in the first place.
.

but if he was only really interested being with men in a romanic capacity he could identify as gay...I mean I'm not sure its as cut and dry, I think its up to the induvidual as to how they see themselves

 

[Andysweden]

Don't go to Atlanta

 

[Elfgore]

19 year old me to 18.

"Hey, dumbass! You know that girl you like and she also likes you back? Yeah, grow a fucking pair and her ask her out."

To 16.

"Your wanted career and game design isn't going to happen. Start thinking about something else now before you throw 8 gran away on a pointless first year of college."

"Get over your damn fear of highways. They're the easiest thing in the universe to drive on."

 

[Idsertian]

You're gay? Just don't show signs of pedophilia or you will get moderated! Just warning you though.

The effects of the evil red button have left me! Hooray! But I actually thought moderators were going to suspend me for saying that. Did you know that bi-sexuality and pan-sexuality are different sexual orientations? I want to ask you a question: if you're gay, and you marry a woman, are you still gay?

Dude, seriously? You do know how homosexuality works, right? Being gay =/= being a paedophile.

Homosexuality = one male being sexually attracted to another.
Paedophilia = an adult being sexually attracted to a child/children.

Not the same thing. At all. But hey, don't believe me? Let the internet educate you!

Homosexuality on Wikipedia. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality]
Paedophilia on Wikipedia. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paedophilia]

As for your second quote, I'm going to blame the Great Firewall of China on your lack of knowledge in that sector. Sucks to have a government that controls your freedom of information and right to knowledge. But enough of that, this ain't the right place for that kind of discussion.

I think you'll find that most people here in the west are well aware of bi-sexuality, though most would be less aware of pan-sexuality. However, neither are exactly a great revelation.

As for your last question: I want you to sit and look at that question. Think about it for a minute, specifically the wording and why those words don't belong together. There are only two reasons (that I can see, someone feel free to correct me otherwise) why a gay man would marry a woman:

1. He is closeted, confused about his sexuality and/or attempting to avoid persecution in his community.
2. He is trying to ease the immigration process to another country and/or gaining citizenship, by marrying an indigenous woman.

In either case, duh, he's still gay.

I don't know if you have this saying in China, or anything approximating it, but here in the UK, the phrase "Engage brain before putting mouth into gear" is often used in situations such as these.

EDIT: OT: Actually, I (23) do have something add to this thread.

Go back in time and tell my dumbass young self (anywhere between 12 and 16) to stop playing games so much and practice writing game reviews and playing guitar. Maybe singing and acting, too.

Maybe I'll join Eevee in that hunt for the TARDIS...

 

[Saulkar]

22 here. I would tell my 15 year old self to focus hardcore on 2D and 3D art as all that time I lollygagged about with it could have been done improving it.

Do not stay up later than 4 A.M. on weekends and never touch the computer after 11P.M. You will irrevocably screw up your internal clock and impair several cognitions, having spent your entire youth staying up way too late and never getting enough sleep.

Lastly, download Blender 3D and Gmax to really get started in animation.

That is all I would tell my 15 year old self.

 

[William Dickbringer]

to 17 year old me: Take the fucking apprenticeship it'll save you 3 years of headache and panicking about your future and won't prevent you from going to school for whatever
Also that chick you love's mom is gonna hate you because of your mental illness so try to talk to her to see if she won't be a massive **** later and also it won't work out cause the girl hides stuff from you so see if you can fix that early
also final thing Just go get a job so you can get a car again saves you so much headache later on if you do

 

[Souther Thorn]

Do it now. Don't be scared. Carpe-fucking-Diem.

 

[LobsterFeng]

I'd tell teenage self that you're not allowed to be depressed until you actually know what life is like.

Oh and your suspicions of Mormonism being a cult are correct.

 

[Drummodino]

20 year old me to high school me: Life gets better after high school, don't let those stupid bullies get you down. In five years you will never have to see them again and you will have friends and family who love and care for you.

Also, stand up for yourself once in a while. I know it's hard but you are going to have to learn to do so.

 

[Kevlar Eater]

To 14-year-old me: There are three girls that have, or will, show interest in you. Two of them are tomboys; one is country strong, the other has incredibly soft hands and knows her way around an engine block. The third girl may be frailer than the tomboys, but she's incredibly smart and helpful; don't let your pride push her away. Totally not worth it, dude.

To 16-year-old me: Two more girls will show interest. One is your next-door neighbor and a basketball-playing tomboy, and the other is bisexual. Do not blow off either of them if you've blown off the girls from two years prior your time. If you did hook up with someone from two years prior, congrats.

To 18-year-old me: Start working out. Yes, more exercise will make your body ache something fierce, but the pain will go away if you keep at it.

 

[FPLOON]

I can think of a few things I would say to him (in no particular canon order[footnote]depending on which of my younger versions I end up running into[/footnote]):

-Dude... Get your grades up! Trust me! You will be the middle school prom king!
-You know that girl named Audrey? She likes you... try to ask her out or something... (No, I don't know what you'll do afterwards, but still... DO IT!)
-That kiss meant NOTHING! Although, in the future, don't be surprised if you end up liking THAT part of the body... Just saying...
-He not worth it... and your mom knows it...
-Keep that anime box set! (You know the one...)
-If I come back here asking if we should make out, don't worry... Consider it self-masturbation or something...

Uh... That last one is questionable, at best... But, for the most part, we would more than likely watch Ed, Edd, n Eddy all day until the timer expires and I come back to my present...

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

34, and I might not say much but if I can affect myself physically there are various years where I'd just appear to my younger self and punch myself square in the face with the cryptic message "you know what you were going to do, don't." followed by the dramatic fade-exit. And maybe a few years of "you know what you weren't going to do, do it anyway" punches.
Nothing I regret doing, I just feel I needed a few square punches to the face for things I did or didn't do in my younger years that I never got any real comeuppance on and that only stoked an ego destined for downfall.

 

[Michael Tabbut]

I'm 20 years old now. I'm gonna tell my 6 year old self these words of advice.
1. Do NOT talk to or befriend Gregory G, it will save you from a lot of problems in five years.
2. Get a part time job at the earliest opportunity.
3. If you ignore my first point...get a good therapist immediately.

 

[Vault101]

snip.

[i/]how do you solve a problem like MAARRII-AHHH[/i]

 

[CrazyGirl17]

24 year-old me to 15-year old me: See that girl there? Either try to e nicer to her and think aout your actions more or don't e friends at all. Trust me, it'll save you a headache later on.

Toe 15-16 year old me: During the Anime Club party, be aware of what you're doing, and don't take anything you shouldn't. Also, don't watch that list of the top scariest movie moments on TV. You'll thank me for it.

And finally, to 11 year-old me: Look, you're going to see some things that will shake your perceptions of the world and will make you cynical and mistrustful of people. Believe me, there's more to it than that, and there are things i this world worth looking forward to.

 

[MrHide-Patten]

"Your an idiot, get used to it"
and/or
"Tell everybody what they want to hear and don't tell em what they don't need to know."

Better I learn it sooner rather than later I figure, stop stressing so hard about crap that way. Might've grown up to have some balls rather than figuring all this stuff out later.