rob_simple said:
I'm curious, what are these 'obvious reasons' why men can't empathise with rape? Because, last time I checked, my arsehole will take a cock just as well as a vagina will, and there are any number of men/women out there strong enough to overpower me.
However, you've never had to think about any of those situations because, and let's be totally honest, they're not going to happen to you. Frankly, the kind of situation you seem to be thinking constitutes "rape" doesn't happen to very many women either.
Reality aside, and the reality is that men almost never get raped unless they fall into the categories described above, you have no reason to fear rape in the way women do. When is the last time the fear of rape prevented you from doing something you wanted to do? I presume you've probably faced violence in your life, did it even cross your mind
in that instance that the violence could turn sexual? If it did, what triggered that?
Some drunk guy randomly shoves you up against the wall, do you fear he's going to sexually assault you? Some guy makes eye contact with you in a bar (no, not a gay bar) and doesn't break it when you look away, do you fear he's going to follow and try and sexually assault you? Some guy comes up to you when you're alone at night and starts innocuously talking to you, do you worry he might try to sexually assault you? You're getting dropped off by a cab and you're the last person out, do you worry the driver might sexually assault you? You've just broken up with a partner when they suddenly show up at your house drunk, do you worry they might try to sexually assault you? In all these cases, if it even crosses your mind, do you worry you might not be able to physically stop them?
I know this is hard, but come on.. it's not
that hard, right?
rob_simple said:
So much of what you have just written is entirely based on your presumptions of what most men are like (what the hell was that bullshit about most men projecting themselves onto the position of the rapist? That's a disgusting accusation,) so unless you have any concrete evidence to support these wild accusations I'm calling shenaynays.
1) For someone who pointed out the limitations of the phrase "many men" you seem remarkably unable to grasp what it actually means. Hint: It means what it says, it means "a significant number without being all". There are a very large number (albeit no specific percentile) of men out there who can empathize with being raped
because they have been raped, or because they've had to deal with the emotional fallout of someone close to them being raped, or because they otherwise haven't been bought up to think of rape as something which they personally don't have to worry about.
2) The phrases I posted, and infinite variations of them, exist in popular culture regarding rape. You can find many on this forum, others coming from the mouths of politicians, lawyers, policemen and virtually every corner of society.
You personally claim to treat rape and stabbing the same, and for purposes of this point I'll buy that. However, and I don't even want to get into the fact that they're physically not the same, they are
clearly and demonstrably not treated the same. The way they are spoken about, both by men and by women, is completely different. You want evidence? Actually look around. Read current affairs pieces. Fuck, read internet forums since you've clearly managed to make it onto one somehow. Do some basic content analysis.
3) Why would any of this be the case? Well, beyond the physical realities that it's extremely rare, can you even remember a single piece of narrative media depicting or reference adult male rape outside of prison in a situation which wasn't an explicit joke or a metaphor for humiliation? You want me to even start to list the narrative media containing depictions or references to the rape of women? Indeed, almost all cultures where rape is acknowledged as a phenomenon, there is a clear perception that women get raped and men do not, clearly and publicly exhibited in media. Again, analysis.
4) If you don't trust your own analytical skills, there are hundreds and hundreds of attitudinal studies regarding gender and rape, but I'm not wasting my life finding references for you when the answers are this damn self-evident from a cursory glance and human society. It's not my job to pander to your state of denial.
rob_simple said:
The thing I find more worrying about this attitude of rape being the worst thing ever, is that it implies, to me, that as a society we now view violence as being so commonplace that there's no need to question it's context in any form of media, it's just a means to an end, but if you decide to throw in a rape scene then, god help you, you better have a damn good excuse for doing it.
What the are you even talking about?
Who the hell says rape is the worst thing ever? Who the hell says violence doesn't matter? Who the hell even phrased a comparison except you?
Because right now, all I'm actually seeing is you trying to claim that rape shouldn't be as big a deal to people as it is. Is that not in and of itself kind of an admission of a failure to display empathy? Maybe, just maybe, there's a
reason other people feel like that which you, having no reference point, are not seeing. Maybe you're not the lone crusader for justice in a world flooded with estrogen, maybe you just need to check your privilege.