What's the dumbest thing you've ever heard or overheard someone say?

[JCBFGD]

"You know, Hitler made tactical decisions based on tricks his dogs did, and he often did this after being injected with crystal meth."--My fucking 10th grade history teacher

Okay, so the meth part is partially true (it was used thought to be super-dee-dooper for you back then), but the dog thing? Just...ugh...I was too stunned to correct him.

Same teacher said the following: "America was the first democracy EVER!!!" Again, I was too stunned to tell him that America is a republic, and the first democracy was Athens.

Don't be too surprised...this guy clearly worshiped Fox News and tried to put a right-wing slant on everything. I'd love to see him fired.

 

[Al-Bundy-da-G]

In a Geography exam the class was marking one of the questions was ''How many states are there in the USA?'', I put my hand up and said 50 but nearly half of my class started yelling that I was wrong and that there was apparently 52.
I wish I was making this up (although being 14 in an all Boys school might have something to do with it).

Hah your all wrong. There's only 46 states. Virginia, Kentucky, Massachusetts, & Pennsylvania are commonwealths. Or do they qualify as both? Ahh screw the details...

My mother dropped these gems,
"Any colorful animal is female because they need pretty colors to attact the men"
"Cutting hair on sundays make you go bald the next day"
"That's not a peach tree" *I show her an unripe peach on the tree* "That doesn't prove anything"

 

[Your Fearless Captain]

Any kind of religious or historically/scientifically inaccurate bullshit just brings my piss to a boil. Also, people accepting gays way too much. It's like, ffs. When you think about it, it's really a mental condition and not a "choice of life" or "personality trait" as many describe it. And yeah, whatever, if they wanna get married so fucking much just let them, but BY FUCK, don't let them adopt children (mindfuck).

?

its like you just contradicted what you said...

most reasons for disliking homosexuality seem to be religiously based. I mean whats wrong with it? can you expect all gays to turn hetero? people have tried that, Im not so sure it works. There is debate where gayness comes from...but from what I can see it is what it is, not somthing you can really prevent

as for the adopting children thing..I dont know, if I were in such a position my only concern about allowing gay coupples to have children would be the predjudice of OTHERS, not their ability to raise a child

I find gay couples adopting children to be to much of a hot button issue my position is "Fuck it. Do whatever you want."

 

[Tax_Document]

'Katanas can cut through tanks'
On this very website.
I wept inside.

Must link... You must LINK!

 

[Batcomrade]

And the thing that bothers me most out of anything: "pepol who tlk li3k dis". And if anyone questions it, they argue that it's not English class. I wasn't aware English class was the only place one was required to show literacy and form coherent sentences...

Many people on the internet employ poor grammar and spelling ironically, perhaps as a way to hide their own insecurities in their writing abilities, or as a form of trolling, or even to 'test' others. Sometimes mistakes made in this fashion are intentionally subtle; barely noticeable, even. You just never know.

 

[Samus Aran but a man]

the 2012 prophecy is probably the dumbest thing I have heard

 

[JoesshittyOs]

Funny you should mention this.

Some kid that I used to go to school with just told grieving friends and family of a kid who got shot and killed at my next door neighbors house today to, and I quote, "grow the fuck up" and realize that soldiers in the United States military are getting killed everyday, and that we are at risk of going to war with about 4 different countries.

So obviously, seeing how literally everyone on my wall knew this guy who got shot, I told him he was a fucking idiot. Fun thing was, about 6 of his military buddies jumped in to defend his behavior, saying things like "when did it become a crime in this country to have a pair of balls" and saying something about him having an alpha personality.

Most disgusting thing I've ever been a part of. And I am very supportive of our military, yet I lost tremendous amounts of respect for the Marines (seeing how they were all marines) today. Never before have I really stereotyped soldiers into a category.

 

[Sonicron]

Back in school, I was talking to an American girl once (exchange student). Very nice and bubbly, but definitely not the brightest bulb in the tanning booth... I might have been able to let it go, but then she dropped the bomb.
Her: "So, how come you guys have so many different languages here in Europe?"
Me: *pause* ... *deadpan sarcasm* "Because we lost that big war a few decades ago."
Her: *genuinely flustered* "Oh dear, I'm so sorry for you!"

 

[Sectan]

Well, there was someone who tried to convince me that Britain and Scotland were part of England, and that the Isle Of Man and Wales didn't exist. He was Adamant in his correctness, the current English exchange student fixed his wagon on all counts.

Spoiler: This soldier knows his geography.

Anyways mine isn't something I've heard. Just the dumbest thing I've seen. Derpy(Too much memebase...) girl in my class is learning how to change a tire in driver's education. She takes the tire off, doesn't know which way to put it back on. She looks at the other tires and proceeds to roll the tire around the parking lot looking for the flat side so she can put it at the bottom.

Oh just remembered. Same girl in science. Teacher's making an obviously wrong example of how to use the scientific method. the example is how the moon is made of cheese and how he would test it if possible. Derpy looks at the teacher wide eyed and is just amazed. "IS THE MOON SERIOUSLY MADE OUT OF CHEESE?"

 

[Merkavar]

years ago in english class we were looking at some poem and the teacher asked if it was a poem or prose or something like that.

myfriend said it wasnt a poem cause it didnt rhyme. the tcher yelled at him "what are you in primary school"

 

[Jmurray21]

One I heard in class, when talking about how a utopia project, was

"Money doesn't grow, it's value doesn't change".

Of course that's how it works. That's why inflation is a lie and coke still costs five cents

Representative Money (such as paper) has, from it's very inception, been the exact same value it always has been: Zero. Nada. Squat. The things we back it up with have value but never the money itself.

Sorry just realised I completely miss explained the situation.

This girl was talking about a utopia society (read communism). She was talking about products never changing value and how money doesn't grow and that its worth doesn't change. I paraphrased what she said and value certainly is the wrong word.

She literally mean't that nothing ever changes the cost of items and money, no matter the currency, its all equal and never changing.

Thanks for pointing out my error in communication

 

[JonnyHG]

Someone in Spanish class asked if a beach had to be connected to the ocean. I find it quite sad that she lacks common knowledge yet spends much of her time on facebook. But you can't live life without being happy right?

Interestingly enough, a beach can be the shore of a lake as well.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/beach

 

[Whispering Cynic]

My highschool biology teacher was completely convinced that there was ice on the Sun.

Ice. On. The. Fucking. Sun.

We're talking water ice, in form of icebergs within sunspots. My mouth fell open so hard I nearly dislocated my jaw. Had to close my mouth manually to start laughing.

 

[Sigmund Av Volsung]

A krogan: I heard theres fish in the presidium rivers and lakes.
In real life:
(an arguement in history class)
So class, did Hitler use censorship in the 1936 olympics(we only knew that he allegedly snubbed Jesse Owens, but it was FDR, not Hitler who snubbed him, bizarrely)
Me: No he didn't
Some girl:yes he did, because he snubbed jesse owens
Mebefore I knew that it was fdr)Yes hitler snubbed him, but he didnt deny that he exists, or that he won a medal!
Some girl: no thats censorship

You want to know the punchline?The teacher sided with her. :/

 

[Secret world leader (shhh)]

"Isn't Norway connected to the ocean?" -girl in my credit level chemistry class.

R.E teacher: "who here doesn't believe in the spirit world." (yes, they actually teach this shit)
*I raise my hand*
R.E teacher "why don't you think there's a spirit world, Evan?"
Me: "well why would there be one?"
Teacher "but what about the meaning of life?"

In a later lesson, this teacher went on to argue against the fact that religion causes wars by essentialy saying that while that is true, communist regimes have killed more people and hitler was an atheist and then basically said that all atheists are marxsists.

In one class we got put into groups and has to design a product, i got grouped with this idiot chav and when we were told we had to design a logo she said "so it's like i nike tick thing...but nae"

 

[Ninjat_126]

Hmm.

I've had friends and classmates at school say pretty stupid things (especially in history class), but usually they realise their mistake the moment they say something out loud.

Back in school, I was talking to an American girl once (exchange student). Very nice and bubbly, but definitely not the brightest bulb in the tanning booth... I might have been able to let it go, but then she dropped the bomb.
Her: "So, how come you guys have so many different languages here in Europe?"
Me: *pause* ... *deadpan sarcasm* "Because we lost that big war a few decades ago."
Her: *genuinely flustered* "Oh dear, I'm so sorry for you!"

Well, if you know nothing about the history of Europe, you might be confused as to why there's so many languages. Personally, I'm surprised that there is so much diversity still considering what I know of the history of the continent, but a lot of European languages are kind of similar to eachother so whatever.

Personally, I've heard some stupid things on the internet, but IRL I usually just ignore anyone stupid enough to say something that stupid.

 

[teebeeohh]

"there were so many people in the senate when Cesar was killed why did nobody make a video or at least take a picture?"

 

[Loud Hawk]

Someone in Spanish class asked if a beach had to be connected to the ocean. I find it quite sad that she lacks common knowledge yet spends much of her time on facebook. But you can't live life without being happy right?

Well...

"A beach is a geological landform along the shoreline of an ocean, sea, lake or river."

So it isn't that dumb a question.

 

[Danny91]

At the end of the film 2012, which I watched again last night: "We're heading for the Drakensberg mountains...I guess thats why they call it the Cape of Good Hope."

They're like half a country apart.