wouldn't say I fear death more fear ceasing to be - the lateral thinker in me can't hold religious beliefs of life after death. We are complex biological machines, my concious is electrical impulses in my brain. When that ceases to function, I am dead and no more.
That is it, all I will have been and there's still so much I want to do.
I've come close many at time - even my birth was a close one, had the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck and came out purple - quick thinking mid-wife resuscitated me.
Another I wasn't wearing a seat belt in a car for half a journey, as a joke I inched it across every time a traffic warden at a set of bust lights looked away - by chance of not only the lights being out for there to be a warden there but also that there was enough traffic mid-afternoon on a work day that we were there long enough for me to get the belt across. Five minutes later we were involved in a collision at about thirty mile an hour - women pulled out of a side street without looking right and hit the front passenger side. The seatbelt left a mark for four days, without it I'd've been through the window and street pizza.
Latest was a coast to coast bike ride where my brakes locked up as I came to a blind corner at what my GPS tracking unit said I was doing 40mph, I managed to hit a six foot gap between a row or cars and a five foot wide tree trunk and walked away with nothing more than a grazed shoulder and whiplash (to continue the next hundred miles with). When I told this tale to a friend he told me of a friend, doing the same coast to coast challenge and on the same hill who wasn't so lucky, he hit a car, broke his jaw and his back - lucky for him he wasn't doing the speed I was.
And they're just the biggies, not small everyday stuff that could get you killed - liek the two jerks that pulled into/out of side streets today without looking and made me screech to a stop on my bike - if my brakes weren't as good, if it was wet, if I'd've been going faster, few seconds difference and I'd've been under their wheels.
I am starting to worry my life is like the "Final Destination" movies where I have a near miss every so often
Death is with us every moment, it's inevitable - one of the few things you can be sure on in life.
But wouldn't life be boring without it, the rush of adrenaline when you get close - knowing today could be your last what would you have wanted to do before it's over? Don't wait for tomorrow, do it today, if it's that important it can't wait.
But as I say, I have so much left undone, my list of experiences I want before I go is lengthy and needing to work to pay for them only lengthens it
