World domination!

[Smagmuck_]

I have been bored for a while now, then I had this great idea. What if I came up with a world domination plan? Well I have thought of many and this is the best one. Also, please post your own world domination plans...



Fourteen steps to world domination:

1.) Aquire power of a government.

2.) Pass law, making hamster breeding legal to only qualified breeders.

3.) Have most trusted breeder breed many hamsters.

4.) Kill breeder.

5.) Build secret bunker in remote location.

6.) Aquire many miles of plastic tubing.

7.) Build holding chamber for hamsters.

8.) Connect tubing from holding chamber to a neuclear weapon ware house.

9.) Infect hamsters with deadly disease that will kill a human if contact is made and release them into the ware house.

10.) Once ware house is cleared of guards and workers, steal nukes.

11.) Threaten world with neuclear holocuast, with a nuke pointed at a random countries capatol.

12.) If they do not comply, nuke France, if the do comply, nuke Denmark.

13.) Nuke every capatol on the globe until only mine remains.

14.) Enjoy.

 

[Julianking93]

You forgot the part where I help you...

 

[Necrofudge]

Good show but the hamsters seem like a setback when you could simply hire some thugs to take out the guards in the nuclear weapons warehouse because I doubt the hamster-powered disease would reach the many employees that will most likely be wearing hazmat suits and whatnot as a safety requirement. Or you could just go to any arabian marketplace. They sell them for pennies. (literally, they only accept pennies as currency, no euro counterparts.)

 

[Booze Zombie]

Make everyone in the world agree with you, possibly by maxing out your persuasion skill.

 

[THEMILKMAN]

just ask nicely

 

[DragonsAteMyMarbles]

Haven't worked out the details yet but I know I'll require a TARDIS, a squad of ninja, a squad of pirates, some exploding jelly babies and my ultimate weapon... the Bunnies Of Doom.

Anyone want in? You'll get your very own country, but I do get to pick which ones I want for myself first.

 

[lostclause]

Certainly one of the more creative doomsday plans I've seen.

 

[Dark Knifer]

Haven't worked out the details yet but I know I'll require a TARDIS, a squad of ninja, a squad of pirates, some exploding jelly babies and my ultimate weapon... the Bunnies Of Doom.

Ninjas already rule the world. But if you wanna ask them about it... Good luck trying to find one.

 

[Krythe]

1. Take over nuclear warhead disposal facility where the US government is conducting secret weapon tests with the power of a random collection of freaks and the Almighty fury of my battle-mullet.

2. Attempt to get detonation codes by having the interrogator use electric shocks instead of waterboarding or fingernail spliting or a million other conventional methods which have little chance of accidental death.

3. Set a deadline giving the US ample time to prepare an infiltration mission.

4. If an agent is detected, rather than throwing all thousand or so of my guys at him at once, I'll send my top commanders to fight him one-on-one in rediculously convoluted battles.

5. If an airstrike is barely beaten off, be sure to issue the US a stern warning and wag my finger. That'll learn 'em.

6. If I must mislead said hero, my accent can slip up occasionally.

7. Get entire army killed in a series of four-or-less on one gunfights.

8. Prove that genes don't matter by nuking china. (Somehow)

9. Get self killed in a fistfight which sets a premise for the sequels.

10. SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11. Something else.

12. Profit.

 

[dududf]

"Leak" a story to Fox "News", DR Phill, andwho ever the hell is trash a story about how the government has been sending citizens to American Death camps, and you're a lone survivor of the beatings and torture. Blame the CIA and proclaim it was in area 51 and you have proof.

After media gets crazy, run as president, look angrily at france, after frace surrenders take all of their attractice women, nuke whats left, trade the women to russia for their nukes, then nuke the world. And retrieve the french women if any are left, and have not been violated.

Then when that's done and the citizens are idolizing me I'll proclaim that the secret rulers of said death camp, are actually 99.99999999999999999999999% of meh, exception me, and all ugly people.

Sneak LSD into the water, and watch.

Lank self into space on a yellow submarine.

Best plan ever.

 

[dududf]

*Edit*

Double Post.

 

[Pimppeter2]

1- Get a Godzilla

2- get a Nuke

3- Profit

 

[Syndef]

1) Amass boundless wealth through investments and business ventures
- disregard moral and legal obligations
- maintain assets through obedient subordinates (preferably heirs)
- donate frequently to non-profit organizations to build reputation of benevolence
2) Run for governor
- serve for a few years while staying out of trouble
3) Run for president
- personal wealth will prevent the need to rely on third parties for funding
- use clean record and philanthropic reputation to advantage
- preach moderate and balanced ideologies regardless of own ideas (to please most people)
- fight dirty, use propaganda and smear campaigns
4) Win election (repeat step 3 if this fails)
5) Arrange an "incident" to frame the Chinese for attacking America
6) War with China
- Use propaganda. Lots of it.
- Mobilize for war effort.
- Refuse to use nukes.
7) "Free Tibet" as well as gain favor with the Taiwanese.
8) Convince most of Asia to fight alongside me in this war.
9) Convince as many European countries to contribute, too.
10) Form official political-economic Coalition under the guise of cooperating for the war.
11) Eventually, China will surrender by our terms.
- conditions of surrender will include never practicing war again (like Japan currently)
12) Keep the Coalition active and pressure China to join.
13) Do whatever it takes to pressure more than 75% of the countries of the world to join Coalition.
*optional* - somehow disband the UN
14) Frame persistently unwilling countries for hostilities against members of the Coalition
15) Conquer and subjugate them, then absorb them into Coalition
- eventually, every country will be in this Coalition
16) With the world "united", declare that one-world government has been achieved. Everyone is now part of the United Earth Coalition.
17) Bend countries to own whim whenever needed, using the Coalition as a base of influence.
18) World domination has been achieved.

 

[zauxz]

1. Somehow legalize pot.

2. Buy every pack of cheetos in this universe. ( starting with your local store, then moove on)

3. Sell them for 100$ each.

4. Profit.

 

[Serge A. Storms]

Pull my penis out in public.

Then it's just a waiting game.

 

[Blatherscythe]

Haven't worked out the details yet but I know I'll require a TARDIS, a squad of ninja, a squad of pirates, some exploding jelly babies and my ultimate weapon... the Bunnies Of Doom.

Anyone want in? You'll get your very own country, but I do get to pick which ones I want for myself first.

Cool can I have Germany?

 

[sukamuka2009]

All you gotta do is be real. Everyone will be at your knees

 

[Kris015]

You can't nuke Denmark, it's impossible.. We have a forcefield you know..

 

[Inverse Skies]

I'd be quite happy not to dominate the world actually. Seems like a lot of responsibility, and then I'd probably have heaps of friend requests on Facebook clugging up my home page with useless statuses. No-one wants that!

 

[ethaninja]

Then what? Play CS?