Worlds Worst Excuses

[Raiha]

"i would help you, but i really don't feel like it"

 

[teisjm]

She was kissing me!

Sadly, I've actually used that one, though it was sortof true.

the best i can come up with is "I was on drugs"

 

[phi161]

"The cat did it"

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/deadlineusa/2009/aug/07/cat-download-child-pornography

 

[j0z]

If it had been made well to start with, it wouldn't have broke

 

[TheNumber1Zero]

"I fell on it"

 

[T-Bone24]

- Where's my money?
- A bird took it.

Cookie for reference.

Scrubs?

"Oh yeah!? Well... shut up!"

 

[Godhead]

The big boys told me to do it

 

[letsnoobtehpwns]

My dog ate it.

Grand Theft Auto 4 made me do it.

 

[Arkhangelsk]

- Where's my money?
- A bird took it.

Cookie for reference.

Scrubs?

"Oh yeah!? Well... shut up!"

Spoiler: Here you go

You deserved it.

 

[Pandalisk]

"But she said she was 18!"

"It wasn't me"
and thats an excuse i use all the time even when the person see me do it.

 

[SimuLord]

"I didn't mean to!" I don't care whether you meant to or not, you DID, now own the fuck up to it!

 

[bjj hero]

She said she was 32...

 

[Aerodynamic]

"This is exactly what it looks likes"

 

[clicketycrack]

I ran over my dog and had to take it to the vet and then it died on the operating table and then I had to attend the funeral. AND THEN THE WORLD FUCKING EXPLODED!

not real well thought out.

 

[Sipo]

"I got explosive diarrhea!"

hahaha i use that one alot actually lol

 

[T-Bone24]

- Where's my money?
- A bird took it.

Cookie for reference.

Scrubs?

"Oh yeah!? Well... shut up!"

Spoiler: Here you go

You deserved it.

My first cookie! Yay... oh, a bird stole it...

 

[D-C-P]

"This is exactly what it looks likes"

Hahahaha Family guy?

 

[Jark]

"Sorry dude, can't help how I feel"

when my best friend stole my GF

 

[Perwer]

"It was the Toxic Avenger!"

 

[electric discordian]

"If I'd known it was going to break down I would have kept the receipt."

No one told me you cant cut down a reinforced concrete pillar with a chainsaw!"

Were training new staff.

These are new burgers there so thick it takes 45mins to cook each side.

Yeah mainly retail from both sides.