Worst review I have seen in a long time (borderlands 2)

[RedDeadFred]

"Borderlands 2?s single-player campaign mode isn?t as good as what you?ll find in games like COD: Black Ops"

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Ohhhhhh, man. That's good stuff! *ahem*

OT: The amount of shit that's going to be flowing his way is going to be crazy.

Well it's certainly true of the first game so why not the second? Remove the co-op and it is tedious. CoD single player is short enough to remain fun, even if it is a little too easy to be challenging. You managed to mock one of his more accurate points

I get that the game might not be for you but saying that CoD has a better single player is one of the most hilariously ridiculous things I've heard in a while. Better in your opinion but that hardly makes it fact. Yes I know, this is just my opinion too but the majority of other hardcore gamers/reviewers will agree with me.

 

[Innegativeion]

Borderlands 2 falls short because it's missing several key elements you need to have in a 2012 first-person shooter game - most notably, a rich multiplayer online mode. There's an extremely limited four-player cooperative mode, and if you have an Xbox Live Gold account, you can team up that way, but this isn't the type of deeply engrossing FPS game the headset-wearing COD crowds gather to play months and months after release. In comparison, I read on several sites that COD: Black Ops 2 will feature up to six teams, for a total of 18 simultaneous players, in multiplayer mode.

I-ii-uh-I...

Borderlands 2 falls short because it's missing several key elements you need to have in a 2012 first-person shooter game - most notably, a rich multiplayer online mode.

You just, you can't...

you need to have in a 2012 first-person shooter game - most notably, a rich multiplayer online mode.

DDDDDDDDDDDTTTTTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

Spoiler: AAAAAAAAAAAAUGH What has humanity done?!

Wow, I could scarcely traverse the first paragraph without breaking down. This truly is the greatest piece of literature of our time. This review. Right here.

 

[Dusty Donuts]

I don't get that first part. Is he condemning the CoD crowd or recommending them? It looks like he generalizing the whole demographic and yet, supporting them as a result.
Eh, it's all a bunch of crud anyway. You can find holes in anything.
"Oh, Skyrim takes too long to get from one point to another"
"LittleBigPlanet suffers from a tiny campaign and the multiplayer is subject to trawling through crap levels to find one good level."

Keep in mind those are gross exaggerations and I actually liked LittleBigPlanet and Skyrim. =P

 

[Jason Rayes]

I find it amusing that several times he speaks of referring to other sources, even wikipedia, in an attempt to figure out what he is talking about. That he still fails is an achievement in itself.

 

[fletch_talon]

I played with my 14-year-old son

Aww that's sweet, a dad spending time with his son.

The game's opening sequence reminds you that Borderlands' developers chose to go the animation route, and I don't like it very much. The game isn't manga-like enough to be super-hip, so instead, it just feels cartoonish.

The game isn't manga-like enough to be super-hip, so instead, it just feels cartoonish.

The game isn't manga-like enough to be super-hip

manga-like enough to be super-hip

super-hip

Though I suggest next time you don't get grandpa to help write the review.

 

[Kopikatsu]

"Borderlands 2?s single-player campaign mode isn?t as good as what you?ll find in games like COD: Black Ops"

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Ohhhhhh, man. That's good stuff! *ahem*

OT: The amount of shit that's going to be flowing his way is going to be crazy.

Well it's certainly true of the first game so why not the second? Remove the co-op and it is tedious. CoD single player is short enough to remain fun, even if it is a little too easy to be challenging. You managed to mock one of his more accurate points

I get that the game might not be for you but saying that CoD has a better single player is one of the most hilariously ridiculous things I've heard in a while. Better in your opinion but that hardly makes it fact. Yes I know, this is just my opinion too but the majority of other hardcore gamers/reviewers will agree with me.

Depends on which Call of Duty we're talking about. Until about a week ago, I had only ever played World at War, but this week I went and played Black Ops and Modern Warfare 3. The reason I went and played those two games is because Call of Duty gets a lot of shit, and so I wanted to see if it was at all deserved.

Modern Warfare 3...I didn't really 'get' most of what was going on, but I imagine that was because I'd joined the trilogy at the very end. But Black Ops...well...I would say that Black Ops has a better single player experience than Borderlands does. Single player Borderlands is like playing on a long-dead MMO. The personal gratification you get from loot scavenging will only take you so far without people to share the experience (and show off to) while Black Ops had an interesting and engaging story. So while the story is cliche, it's still different enough that it's worth an honorable mention in the video game world.

tl;dr, I would say that Call of Duty: Black Ops beats Borderlands 1/2 as far as single player goes, and which one wins after that is...dunno! Haven't played Black Ops' multiplayer, but I imagine that the 'better' one depends on the person and their specific tastes.

 

[Innegativeion]

"Manga-like enough to be super hip"

"You need to have... multiplayer online mode"

and

"Borderlands 2 doesn't just bill itself as an FPS. It's a space Western FPS"

I think are my favorites.

 

[Spectrum_Prez]

I'm annoyed by his description of it as a "role-playing shooter".

If Borderlands 2 is anything like the first, it shouldn't go anywhere near the term "role-playing".

Yes, I'm still bitter Borderlands wasn't Fallout 3 with better shooting and cell-shading.

 

[seditary]

I haven't had such mirth at the flailing of another human being in a long time.

Well done sir.

 

[RedDeadFred]

"Borderlands 2?s single-player campaign mode isn?t as good as what you?ll find in games like COD: Black Ops"

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Ohhhhhh, man. That's good stuff! *ahem*

OT: The amount of shit that's going to be flowing his way is going to be crazy.

Well it's certainly true of the first game so why not the second? Remove the co-op and it is tedious. CoD single player is short enough to remain fun, even if it is a little too easy to be challenging. You managed to mock one of his more accurate points

I get that the game might not be for you but saying that CoD has a better single player is one of the most hilariously ridiculous things I've heard in a while. Better in your opinion but that hardly makes it fact. Yes I know, this is just my opinion too but the majority of other hardcore gamers/reviewers will agree with me.

Depends on which Call of Duty we're talking about. Until about a week ago, I had only ever played World at War, but this week I went and played Black Ops and Modern Warfare 3. The reason I went and played those two games is because Call of Duty gets a lot of shit, and so I wanted to see if it was at all deserved.

Modern Warfare 3...I didn't really 'get' most of what was going on, but I imagine that was because I'd joined the trilogy at the very end. But Black Ops...well...I would say that Black Ops has a better single player experience than Borderlands does. Single player Borderlands is like playing on a long-dead MMO. The personal gratification you get from loot scavenging will only take you so far without people to share the experience (and show off to) while Black Ops had an interesting and engaging story. So while the story is cliche, it's still different enough that it's worth an honorable mention in the video game world.

tl;dr, I would say that Call of Duty: Black Ops beats Borderlands 1/2 as far as single player goes, and which one wins after that is...dunno! Haven't played Black Ops' multiplayer, but I imagine that the 'better' one depends on the person and their specific tastes.

You haven't even played Borderlands 2 so I don't really see how you can judge it...

Anyway, I'll agree that the beginning of Borderlands isn't all that great and neither is the story in general (although neither is Black Ops, it's just there to facilitate one Michael Bay set piece after another) but as far as the actual gameplay goes, Borderlands brings way more variety, challenge and hilarity. I guess I just prefer shooting lots of different enemies with lots of different guns to shooting the exact same soldier with maybe 10 different guns over and over.

Edit: I just noticed that you're a different person than the person I originally responded to. I could tell by his wording that he hadn't played Borderlands 2. If you have and it's just not for you then I retract my first statement.

 

[Faladorian]

snip

So, this is the worst review ever and you laughed at it because...?

Because of the way it was written? Maybe.

Because of the comparisons he made to Call of Duty? Probably.

Because you have a huge positive bias toward Borderlands and he didn't enjoy it? Definitely.

---

Yes, he made mention of games like Halo and Call of Duty, but in all fairness those are the top FPS's for a reason. Now, don't get me wrong, I've never personally bought any installment of either franchise and I don't play them at all. But if we're talking FPS mechanics, they're both superior to Borderlands.

I have a feeling if it was written the same way, but he was saying positive things about Borderlands 2, none of the people in this thread would be saying "Aw fail review what a fail review," they'd be saying nothing at all.

---

There are people out there who don't like Borderlands. In fact, with the terrible impression the first game made on me, the review you posted made me slightly MORE interested in Borderlands 2.

Do you know why that is?

...because it seems like it has a freaking plot.

I know Borderlands had a plot, but it was trash. Nothing about the game motivated me to do anything at all. The depressing realization that the game world in Borderlands is so dull, tedious, uninteresting, and pretentious made me less motivated to do anything in the game itself than I do in real life... and that's saying something.

Personally, I'd be generous to say that Borderlands is only in the Top 5 worst games I've ever bought, as opposed to just outright declaring it the worst.

I know people like different things. I know some people like hip-hop and I'm okay with that. Some people like romantic comedies, and that's fine. I don't like either of those at all but people have different tastes.

There is one single thing I really can not fathom that any single soul would enjoy, though, and that is Borderlands. I ache just thinking about playing that game.

Anyway, the point is, it's not a fail review just because you're excited about the game, you're a fan who read a bad review. There are bad reviews for my favorite games, too. Shit happens.

 

[Kopikatsu]

Edit: I just noticed that you're a different person than the person I originally responded to. I could tell by his wording that he hadn't played Borderlands 2. If you have and it's just not for you then I retract my first statement.

Yeah, I've played it. Currently have a level 17 Axton and level 7 Salvador(e?).

 

[Naeras]

snip

So, this is the worst review ever and you laughed at it because...?

Because of the way it was written? Maybe.

Because of the comparisons he made to Call of Duty? Probably.

Because you have a huge positive bias toward Borderlands and he didn't enjoy it? Definitely.

Personally I have never played either of the Borderlands-games, and have zero interest in them. I still think this review was hilariously poor.

 

[Ed130 The Vanguard]

snip

I know Borderlands had a plot, but it was trash. Nothing about the game motivated me to do anything at all. The depressing realization that the game world in Borderlands is so dull, tedious, uninteresting, and pretentious made me less motivated to do anything in the game itself than I do in real life... and that's saying something.

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ExcusePlot [excuse plot]

Much like Torchlight and the original Diablo the plot of Borderlands is mealy something to string together a world where there are revolvers that shoot shotgun shells.

The main points people are bringing up are that comparing Borderlands 2 to COD is like comparing apples to oranges or Romeo and Juliet to A Midsummers Night Dream.

Sure both plays were written by Shakespeare and involve romance but there the similarities end. One is a tragedy which could have happened in the real world (baring the 'deathstate' poison) the other involves wacky hijinks between fairy's.

Both games are First person perspective and involve guns but that's where things end, one goes for the gritty realistic route with a focus on realism. The other has squeaky voiced midgets as opponents and one of its draws is the ability to find sniper rifle minigun.

You can't really compare the two.

 

[Faladorian]

Personally I have never played either of the Borderlands-games, and have zero interest in them. I still think this review was hilariously poor.

It was naive and the grammar was lacking.

But what I meant was the sheer passive-aggressive/aggressive aspect of the OP in regards to the review. That reaction could have only been warranted by his inner Borderlands fanboy. That's what I meant.

 

[Faladorian]

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ExcusePlot [excuse plot]

Much like Torchlight and the original Diablo the plot of Borderlands is mealy something to string together a world where there are revolvers that shoot shotgun shells.

The main points people are bringing up are that comparing Borderlands 2 to COD is like comparing apples to oranges or Romeo and Juliet to A Midsummers Night Dream.

Sure both plays were written by Shakespeare and involve romance but there the similarities end. One is a tragedy which could have happened in the real world (baring the 'deathstate' poison) the other involves wacky hijinks between fairy's.

Both games are First person perspective and involve guns but that's where things end, one goes for the gritty realistic route with a focus on realism. The other has squeaky voiced midgets as opponents and one of its draws is the ability to find sniper rifle minigun.

You can't really compare the two.

I won't click that tvtropes link... it's already quarter to 2am

---

I see what you're saying, but I was talking about the shooting aspect alone. As for the excuse plot, I realized that before I even played the game. But it wasn't even a compelling excuse plot in any way.

Another game with the same type of excuse plot was Fallout 3. I didn't care about the Lone Wanderer's dad at all. But in the process of ignoring the main plot, I had an unprecedented amount of fun. The fun with Borderlands stopped a few hours in. In fact, I played it for 5 hours total (across 3 days, I had to take frequent breaks but I REALLY tried to give the game a chance) and after those 5 hours, I didn't simply quit the session and forget to play it...

I yelled, "THIS IS SO FUCKING BORING!!!" and uninstalled the game. I was mad I even bought it for $6-7 on the summer sale. I found it to be that bad. I'm not sure why I had a more visceral reaction to that game than any other. I can picture myself going back and playing ET or Superman 64 just to show someone how bad it is, but I doubt I could stomach doing that for Borderlands.

 

[Ed130 The Vanguard]

-snip-

I see, so the looting aspect didn't engage with you. Fair enough.

As for the TV Tropes link I apologise, It's only 6pm here.

 

[PhunkyPhazon]

Oh wow. This feels like it was written by a college frat-boy who has no knowledge of gaming outside of Halo and COD. Nothing wrong with him having his opinions, but this would be like if I tried to write an article on (American) football. It will only end in disaster.

 

[Faladorian]

-snip-

I see, so the looting aspect didn't engage with you. Fair enough.

As for the TV Tropes link I apologise, It's only 6pm here.

But again, I don't know why. I used to play World of Warcraft. I've played Diablo II. I've played Mass Effect 1. I've been exposed to plenty of games with loot systems almost identical to Borderlands, but it just didn't help.

Y'know what it might be? It could be that the starting guns look "too cool" to be starting guns. If you started with a grey revolver that shot regular rounds, then slowly upgraded to a more powerful gun as you leveled up, etc., it'd be much more engaging.

But when the first gun I get in that game looks like a spiked forklift on fire that shoots electricity, I don't feel like there's any progress to be made. I just eventually get a gun from a chest and have to decide if I like the better stats enough to swap it out for the ugly puke-green color that it happens to be.

Y'know what I'm getting at with this? There's a reason at level 5 your guy in WoW looks like a hobo, and the level 80-somethings you see in your nearest hub city look like walking gods. It's called incentivizing your game.

 

[Smeggs]

It's amusing how much of a blatant CoD fanboy this guy is that he can't review a game that is in no way similar to CoD, save for having guns in it. Is there even a single paragraph where he's not bitching about how he'd rather be playing Black Ops? If it weren't for the fact that it seems so sincere I'd guess this was a satirical article. But, sadly, I know it isn't.

"The game's opening sequence reminds you that Borderlands' developers chose to go the animation route, and I don't like it very much. The game isn't manga-like enough to be super-hip, so instead, it just feels cartoonish."

In no way does this comment have anything to do with the proper review of a game. And it's supposed to be cartoonish. The cartoonish look is supposed to make it more fun and unique, because it has its own look. Y'know, to seperate it from every other shooter out there. Like CoD.

Also, what was that he said?

"The games controls are like COD."

That little comment for some reason made me very angry.

No, mothafuckah, the game's controls are like virtually every other FPS ever created beforehand. COD didn't create analogues and triggers. Hell, even Halo came out before COD. The reason FPS games have virtually the same control scheme-wise is because that's what the controller was created with in mind. Optimized functionality. Nobody is suddenly going to change that because it'd be idiotic.