Would you date a former cheater?
- Thread starter game-lover
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Yes I would. People do stupid shit and make mistakes. Shunning them forever won't help them.
But if they cheat on me they get no consideration for an extra chance and they're gone from my life for good.
But if they cheat on me they get no consideration for an extra chance and they're gone from my life for good.
If our chemistry were good enough, yeah. I don't consider any mistakes she's made in the past to be my business. If she's the one who told me that she'd done so, I'd also probably be impressed at her honesty rather than disgusted.
Of course, if I already knew that this girl repeatedly cheated, I'd be kind of amazed if I had good enough chemistry to be interested in her in the first place.
Of course, if I already knew that this girl repeatedly cheated, I'd be kind of amazed if I had good enough chemistry to be interested in her in the first place.
Eh... I've been cheated on in almost every major relationship that I've been a part of, so my track record speaks for itself already.
If it weren't a 'serious' relationship, then yeah, I don't see why not. But if I'm getting into something with a person that I know has a penchant for sleeping around, then I'm probably not going to expect anything long-term to come out of it. If it's something they only did once and they regret it, there's no issue. If it's something they've done to every guy they've been with... that's a different can of worms.
If it weren't a 'serious' relationship, then yeah, I don't see why not. But if I'm getting into something with a person that I know has a penchant for sleeping around, then I'm probably not going to expect anything long-term to come out of it. If it's something they only did once and they regret it, there's no issue. If it's something they've done to every guy they've been with... that's a different can of worms.
Hurray I finally made a joke that didn't fly over everyone's head!Rose and Thorn said:Odds are I am probably not your type, but I'll add ya to the list!disgruntledgamer said:
Oh and you'd be surprised pretty lady.
Yeah real sensitive dude... I didn't mean it like that. She was so depressed and down on herself she developed anorexia... jeez.astrav1 said:
Well, I did, and it did not work out well for me. And I almost unknowingly started dating another one recently, but thankfully I managed to see through her words, and noticed who she really was before it got serious. They rarely truly change, so...
theriddlen top tip - AVOID
EDIT:
On a unrelated note, 1000 posts hurray!
theriddlen top tip - AVOID
EDIT:
On a unrelated note, 1000 posts hurray!
I dated someone who had a history of cheating, because I believe anyone can change habits like that if they want to. That was not my experience though.
Probably not. I would not be able to trust them enough I think. If it was a fling or just something for fun, then okay. And maybe they'd be able to build enough trust during that time that I'd be able to do it, but as it stands I don't think I could. Every time I couldn't get a hold of her, or every time she'd change plans or whatever, even if they are perfectly honest reasons, that little voice in the back of my head would go, "What if she's...?" and it would end up driving a wedge between us.
You can create an environment which promotes it or drives someone to it which is what I think she meant.astrav1 said:
Yeah, I would. But I'm not really the jealous sort. I wouldn't really be that bothered if someone I was dating cheated on me. I'd honestly rather be with someone who considers themselves to be their own person, than someone who obsesses over being in a relationship. I like people who are really independent, and my assumption would be that if someone I was dating cheated on me, it's because there's something I couldn't give them. That's fine, and if I liked them enough I'd rather they get what they need to be happy than devote themselves solely to me.
No, I wouldn't date a cheater. To me one of the most important aspects of a relationship is trust, if you can't trust someone then to me it isn't a real relationship. I guess my distaste primarily stems from the fact that my first relationship ended by me finding out that she had cheated on me.
I've honestly never understood the mentality of cheaters. One of my roommate's girlfriend came back from her spring break and our other roommate heard through a mutual friend that she had hooked up with another guy during her trip. She hadn't planned on telling her boyfriend and when confronted she was like omg I was having a fun time and I was horny don't you guys understand? And I was like....no, if you're horny just go to your motel room and flick your bean, clean up when you're done and move on.
I even had one of my best friends nonchalantly tell me that she was seeing multiple (3+) guys at one time. And I was like wtf why? She said that until she decided to settle down with one she was going to keep on seeing all of them.
I've honestly never understood the mentality of cheaters. One of my roommate's girlfriend came back from her spring break and our other roommate heard through a mutual friend that she had hooked up with another guy during her trip. She hadn't planned on telling her boyfriend and when confronted she was like omg I was having a fun time and I was horny don't you guys understand? And I was like....no, if you're horny just go to your motel room and flick your bean, clean up when you're done and move on.
I even had one of my best friends nonchalantly tell me that she was seeing multiple (3+) guys at one time. And I was like wtf why? She said that until she decided to settle down with one she was going to keep on seeing all of them.
Yes. If you can't forgive people for their mistakes and allow them to change, you aren't a very nice person. Besides which, I'm not one of those people who puts cheating up there with murder. If someone cheated on me, I might be a bit hurt, but I'd get over it.
No, probably not.
I think trust is pretty important and once you know they'd be willing to cross that line then it's not really gonna happen.
Not that I wish bad things on former cheaters, if they can turn it around then they'll make someone very happy.
It just wont be me.
I think trust is pretty important and once you know they'd be willing to cross that line then it's not really gonna happen.
Not that I wish bad things on former cheaters, if they can turn it around then they'll make someone very happy.
It just wont be me.
Sure.game-lover said:
I've dated former cheaters.
I've been the person someone cheated on their sig other with.
And (long ago) I cheated on someone myself.
**shrug**
Cheating typically isn't a habit, it's a symptom of a bad relationship. Not that there aren't habitual cheaters - there are - but that isn't most of them.
If someone was honest about what they'd done in the past then I'd give them a chance.
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Bara_no_Hime said: