Would you date a former cheater?

Phasmal

Sailor Jupiter Woman
Jun 10, 2011
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disgruntledgamer said:
I think I'm seeing thing pretty clearly, you say one thing but your manner and tone say another. How can I think deal breakers are a bad thing I made an entire thread about it remember, and most of those things in my list weren't jokes FYI. You know for someone who complains that I'm picking on them you certainly don't hesitate to hit the reply button. Listen hun I know you're a bit jealous that I'm prettier than you (I'm prettier than most girls) and are upset my mind comes with my body, but that's just the way it is.
When did I say you were picking on me?
I just said you seemed to have a problem with me saying no and not others.

Of course I don't hesitate to hit reply, you keep quoting me.
But if you feel there needs to be a distinct end, then here:
AND THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

You may now feel free to not reply.
Or if you simply must reply, then I won't reply to you, if it makes it easier on you.
 

disgruntledgamer

New member
Mar 6, 2012
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Phasmal said:
When did I say you were picking on me?
I just said you seemed to have a problem with me saying no and not others.

Of course I don't hesitate to hit reply, you keep quoting me.
But if you feel there needs to be a distinct end, then here:
AND THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

You may now feel free to not reply.
Or if you simply must reply, then I won't reply to you, if it makes it easier on you.
And you keep quoting me! I'd just like to point out I didn't even have enough time to make a quick 10second edit to add 6 little words on to the end of my post before you jumped allover me. Am I really that good looking ladies, am I really that irresistible even with a bad photo?

Jodan said:
Personally i would feel bad if my girlfriend didnt take advantage of a good offer just be cause she was dating me.
holing herself back from enjoying herself and getting to know someone just because she committed to me is self denial to me and almost self abuse.
we sould just be happy that the other was having a good time while the other was indisposed with lifes crap like work and the such. its a little more comlecated than that but thats the gist.
That's actually not very hygienic, I hope you get tested on a regular basis dude. I don't hold someones past against them, everyone's prone to make mistakes it's just a matter of the right situation coming up at the wrong time. I do hold people responsible for the present tho, regardless if the odds of it happening were less than winning the lottery and it may never happen again. 1 Strike and you're out, no exceptions.
 

babinro

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Sep 24, 2010
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No.

I'm in my 30's. If someone cheated in highschool then I'd probably let that go.
Most of us mature and change quite a bit from those years.

If this person cheated in their 20's or later then I'd have a hard time trusting them and would avoid a relationship altogether. It's entirely possible that they've learned from their mistakes...but I'm not willing to devote the time and effort to find out.
 

DoomyMcDoom

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Jul 4, 2008
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Depends, some people go through phases in their life where they bounce around a lot, and cheating happens, some people are seemingly chronically obsessed with finding someone new after being with anyone for a time, and they don't seem to care enough to break it off before moving on, I'd date the former as long as they'd grown out of it, and the latter tend not to let you know that they do this, I usually look for tells in how she behaves in public to see if she has someone else attatched, and if it becomes obvious enough, I'll ask her or just break it off.

I've been the "other man" by accident a few times, and it sucks.
 

DkLnBr

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Apr 2, 2009
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No, I couldn't trust them. Every time they said something like "I love you" or "I want to be with you forever" or "I would never leave you" I could never help but think "How much did they say that to the other guy before they cheated? or while they're cheating" and what's stopping them from doing it again? If they get bored with the relationship or find someone better, then they've already proven that they're willing to cheat
 

BlueKenja

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Jul 4, 2011
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Eh originally I probably wouldn't have entertained the idea at all but now...yeah I probably would, not just from a hypothetical perspective either...
I went out with a guy a year back who I'd been close friends with for a while, I always had feelings for him and was really into him, ended up falling in love with him.
After about 3 months into the relationship he got moody and strange and just not like the guy I'd known for almost a year up to then and broke it off with me after 5 months total.
I was heartbroken but tried to stay friends with him, he came back begging for another chance which I gave him...he cheated on me after 2 weeks which was totally out of (his presented) character.
That really hurt me emotionally and I ended up cutting all ties.

Flash forward to today and I started rebuilding my friendship with him over the last month and realise I never really stopped having feelings for him, even would go with him again if he asked provided he could give me some guarantee he wouldn't fuck up again.

Not sure if this is my own emotional weakness, the lack of gay/bi guys who are interested in something long term or a combination : /
 

chaos order

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Jan 27, 2010
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disgruntledgamer said:
Phasmal said:
Haha.
It does beg the question why you started this thread if you were just gonna get all flapped if someone actually said `no`.

It's still confusing to me why you actually care.
This is not going to affect me in any way. I already have a boyfriend so who I will or will not date is really not relevant, and it's really not uncommon for people not to want to date someone who has cheated before.
If you feel that makes me bad or judgemental, well... I couldn't care less.

Still confused why you're not arguing with everyone else who said `no`.
I started this............. Cough.........ok if you say so.

And there is a big difference between saying no probably not and saying "No" in an almost snooty, superior stuck up matter, at least that's how you're rubbing off on me. Like I said I don't cheat, mainly because I've seen the repercussions of cheating like HPVs that cause cervical cancer which condoms don't block, but I'm not going to sit there and be judgmental of someone who might of made a mistake over half a decade ago. Believe it or not people do change, sometimes for better, sometimes for worse.

370999 said:
Depends

Why did they cheat? When did they cheat? Was it ages ago? Do they have a habit of cheating? Are they repentant over it? Are they likely to cheat again?
Someone with an open reasonable mind, lets get all the facts together before we start passing out judgment.
i have a problem with the first three questioned posed here.

the answer to the first one doesnt make a difference (at least to me) there is no valid reason to cheat.
the second and the third one also dont affect me either. Now if it was how older they were when they cheated and said person cheated on their partner when they were like thirteen (you know when kids are stupid) then maybe ya that'd be fine; but if theyre an adult then really theres no excuse there whether or not it was a long time ago.

Yes i realize that people make mistakes but then there are consequences to those mistakes as well; one of them being unable to date a HOT STUD LIKE ME.
 

Lucyfer86

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Jun 30, 2011
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No, just no. I have zero tolerance on cheating.
And i usually don't trust people anyway, let alone someone who has cheated someone at some point.
 

Harbinger_

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Jan 8, 2009
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No I would not. I have trust issues and I could never trust someone that knowingly cheated on a person.
 

TehCookie

Elite Member
Sep 16, 2008
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No, you break up if you're having troubles. If he cheated and broke up right after that I may consider it though.