You are proclaimed "Evil Overlord of Earth", what do you do first?

[SkellgrimOrDave]

Disband all power in the world and create the land of "Do-as-you-please" V for vendetta style.

The book that is, not the film.

 

[Buleet]

First off.
Get myself a better public image.Being known as "the evil overlord of the world" will just get some teenagers with swords that should be impossible to succesfully swing around attack and somehow succesfully kill me.
Become known as "The great king" or something,They always trust kings as long as they don't wear black spikey armor at all times.
I will also make it attractive and rewarding to be in my personal army so i don't get grumblers and retards as my guards.
And of course if destiny says that some little kid will kill me later non i will not destroy that village,it will just speed up his "wants to kill me" desire.
And follow the evil overlord list where appropriate really.
also if you are about to be killed pull off a Xanatos gambit and a lot of fourth wall breaking so i will allways be remembered as a likeble and genuis villain or something to "The great Watchers".
So they will demand me to be back when i get stabbed in the eyeballs and thrown off a cliff while on fire.Best insurancy policy ever.

 

[Lucian The Lugia]

Destroy PETA.

 

[CultistRat]

I figure first off I'd start research to devise a culling/breeding plan to make the species naturally smarter and stronger through genetics, then on to space travel and robotic augmentations.

 

[Zyxzy]

Get mankind off this rock.

 

[Simeon Ivanov]

I'd ban religion in public places.
Then I will kill every corrupt person with a single shred of political power in them.
Then I will go to my floating harem on the moon and have sex with space bitches.

 

[sage42]

Let's see here two roads I can take, one is follow the Evil Overlords Guide, very useful. And Still cure world disease and what not. And Evil overlord needs minions after all.

Or I can just cure all disease and leave the world to it's won devices. Of course letting the world run it's course hasn't really worked so far.

Edit: Oh yes and outlaw Anything Justin Beiber. Doesn't matter weather I'm evil or good, that shit is a universal act.

 

[Hayden Miller]

I would fix all the problems with the world that capitalism and democracy, as good as they are, cannot. I would first, of course, work to fix the economic disaster nested in Africa, make the various states there into enterprising countries. Then, of course, turning our scientific direction towards more progressive things, like all that "colonizing planets" and "Clean energy" that capitalism, again good as it can be, cannot really directly strive for due to bureaucratic issues. Okay last two things I can think of right now, legalize Marajuana, and install a birth rate, sorry fella's, we just need one, no getting around it!

 

[masher]

First order of business: declare "Evil" the new "Good."

 

[Monsterfurby]

Liquidate all of Scientology's assets and use the money to fund a programme to colonize the solar system.

Also: Get 365 dark gray Zhongshan suits made (high-collared predecessor of the Mao suit), one for every day of the year.

Oh, and just to be on the safe side: Fund research into the MGS2 "magnet shield" used by Fortune and the Patriots, in case someone doesn't like my reforms.

 

[Phuctifyno]

Quit my job, get a one-room apartment, cancel my phone plans, close all online accounts, drop off the grid entirely, lock the door, get hooked up to a "food-in" tube and a "food-out" tube, play Skyrim. ...and the rest of you can deal with your own shit.

 

[Imperial Dane]

Well when the inevitable reign of the Imperial Dane begins here's what will happen:

Shatter all the large corporations so that no single person or entity may ever attain large amounts of wealth thus becoming a threat to my glorious rule.

Reform the penal system to focus on Resocialization for those that can be redeemed, eternal penal labour for those that can't.

Ban MMOs and console exclusives.

Initiate a project to colonize space in my exalted name.

Establish a new Wehrmacht to serve as my most Imperious Army.

Initiate an inquisition to deal with cults and other weird "religions"

Have huge bronze statues built of me all across the globe.

About it for the moment. More edicts will come

 

[70R4N]

Sit on my ridicoulusly big throne all day and lack interest in that puny rebellion which will inevitably be my doom at the end.

 

[LordLoudmouth]

Do words "complete domination" and "heretical godhood" bring any mental images?

 

[userwhoquitthesite]

One random, seemingly normal, day, You are proclaimed "Evil Overlord of Earth". You have the entire world under your control, out of the blue, and somehow accomplished what Dr. victor von doom only dreams of. what do you do first?

I'd take half the worlds money, reinstate all former world leaders, are retire, to my flying lair-castle of dread.

EDIT: you can be good with your power. you could be "the mr nice guy" if you want. there is not limitations.

officially change my title from evil overlord to "The Idiot in Charge"

this will make me beloved, though mocked, throughout the land. I will follow this with a charismatic campaign of spine removal. Once de-spined, the largest part of the populace will not my anle to stand against me. at which point I will exact terrible vengeance on my greatest enemies: makers of the plastic fedora and stylish bucket hat. once these undesirables have been removed, the next phase of my world rule will be to slowly detach new jersey from the rest of the United States, and if caught, explain that I am going to make it the worlds first Flying State. Then I will sink it in the ocean, allowing them to evolve into the merfolk their hair most describes.

 

[Detective Prince]

Pandas. An army of pandas.

 

[talker]

i would firstly the moon and put a big laser cannon on it
then get the 300 hottest chicks in the world and my 2 best friends on the moon(and myself)
then blow up earth with the laser cannon and start rebuilding the human race by dividing the 300 hottest chicks amongst myself and my 2 friends, then start doing the deed.

 

[talker]

no wait. i will also save the best game companies (EA games etc) and make them develop great games for me. but they will not be allowed near the women on penalty of death.

 

[Aurora Firestorm]

Oh yeah. I will establish a little colony for myself and my friends. I will import the best companies to this area, in their chosen fields. It will be on the East Coast, and it will have a dedicated extermination team to ensure that it has no biting insect life. It will be near the beach and a bunch of lakes, and the lakes will be scraped clean of that gross grassy stuff that grows in most lakes. It will have large houses with lots of space, a horse farm, many kinds of recreational vehicles, and all the streetlights will turn off at night so we can see the stars. No large city is allowed for at least an hour's travel from the town.

Smoky-eye eyeliner will be banned, seriously, you guys look like raccoons in that.