I would like to replace my digestive system with a 3D printer please. One that can print chemical compounds such as medication amongst other useful goodies. The printer will be the digestive system from now on. I eat the materials, it prints the 3Ds. Most importantly, it can be turned off at any time. Slightly less importantly, what was once my poo would now be anything the recycler/crafter combo is asked to craft, it could even craft hot meals for starving young orphans! Water filtration devices for people in areas with contaminated quenches! Or for peak irony; toilet roll!
It may not sound like a weapon, but give it time. And imagination. Oh and it should let me eat any material, with the right safety engineering, and there'd be a menu where i can tinker with what flavour and texture occurs when masticating on some used bin bags and empty coffee jars. To others, they'd be tasting dry plastic, sharp stabbies and plenty of blood. But to my upgraded spud funnel, it would be homemade chicken kievs, lightly spiced cheese-topped wedges and even more blood.
