Your age and your thoughts

[Silentpony_v1legacy]

snip

Yeah that sounds rough. My parents asked me like 7 years ago if I wanted kids. I said no, and dad just shrugged "okay". My mom still tries about once a year to talk me into it, but its not working.

And everyone around me is the same. No one cares.

 

[Programmed_For_Damage]

41. Trust me, it doesn't get any better when you make it this far.

I disagree a bit (unless my life is going to fall to shit in the next five months). I'm 40 and I wish I had the mentality I have now back when I was in my teens and 20's. Back then everything seemed so crucial and if someone had beef with me it seemed like a big deal. Now I'm like "who gives a shit". Most of the stuff that was drama back then is water off a duck's back now. As you get older you realise what's important and what's just noise. Plus I've got a wife and kids, so I'm happy how things turned out.

The only thing that sucks is my body isn't as resilient as it once was. I'm still physically strong, but if I'm not careful I cop an injury and it takes a long time to recover. Case and point, I got involved in an arm wrestling contest with my 20 something year old cousins. Whooped them all, but a couple of days later the bulging disc in my neck flared up and I've spent a month in discomfort while it heals. Was it worth it? Well, the jury is still out on that.

 

[Programmed_For_Damage]

I don't generally click well with children and up until fairly recently I considered myself child-free . If I turned out to be infertile because of some medical defect, I wouldn't go stealing babies from hospitals and I don't think it would make that much of an impact on my life personally. That being said, taking a potentially child-free stance has caused some... interesting responses.

I have been called selfish, I am regularly told "If you don't have one, you're going to regret it."
One time, I told my boss I was feeling sick in the morning and his response was "You don't think you might be pregnant do you?" there was little reason other than feeling sick (in the morning) for that conclusion.

After a while ... it does get to you. My SO and I are pretty set on the idea that we will not be having kids right now, if I had to get an abortion, the absolute only person who would know is my SO. God help me if any of our parents found out we aborted a grandchild.

I know ultimately it's my decision and I can, with little regret tell them all to kindly fuck off. It just gets tiring.

Can I just applaud you for being honest about it? I've known quite a few mothers who should not under any circumstances have had kids. They had them for misguided reasons and they fucked the kid's life up right out of the gate. If you look inside yourself and you know that hey, I'm just not cool with the kids thing, that's emotional maturity right there. You might change your mind, you might not. But that decision is yours and yours alone and it sucks that you cop grief over it. I must admit that being a guy you don't get so much pressure in that regard.

I'm good friends with a guy in his 50's at work and him and his partner of 30+ years have never had kids. While I love my kids to death and don't regret being a father, I'd be lying if I said on the odd occasion I've never felt a pang of jealousy of them having so much disposable income and the ability to do whatever whenever.

 

[Zhukov]

29, 30 later this year.

Fuck me sideways, where did those 20s go?

My hair is a lost cause and I've noticed that I no longer heal like I used to. Injuries that I could recover from in weeks can now take 3-6 months to completely go away.

On the other hand, I'm fitter and prettier than I ever was in my teens or early twenties.

As for the whole life progress/goals thing... umm... my affairs are stable but not where I want them to be long term. Much work remains to be done, including, yes, shit that I really should have been doing at 25. Oh well, there's still time. I'm not old yet, right? Right?

 

[josnorgren]

25. But have a younger appearance. People regard me as a 18-to-20-year-old.
I'm quite childish though. I guess that works.

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[TheMysteriousGX]

32 and having to rebuild by digestive tract from scratch after a pair of stomach viruses back to back. Tell you what, all sorts of...interesting things happen in a small intestine that lacks bacteria.

Past that, I feel I'm wise enough to evaluate my past self and figure out how much of an idiot I was. Not sure if that's introspection or depression, but there you go. Pretty resigned to being a cog that helps out the more talented and passionate among us. No girlfriend, no boyfriend, no kids, and okay with all that. Got some stellar friends and a YouTube show to whittle away the time.

 

[Scarytown_v1legacy]

28
Thinking I should probably get settled but there's still so much I want to do before that. Also feeling pressure that if I wait too much longer to make a decision (aka have children) I could regret it.

26, nearly 27.

Feeling restless to get settled, if that makes sense. A lot of people I know are having babies and getting married.
I know we're not quite ready for all the rest yet.

So it kinda feels like I'm waiting until we are.

Basically this, all the "So when are you two going to get married?" and "your clock is ticking, tsk tsk" societal pressure doesn't help.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that maybe you're from the midwest or has family from the midwest? Back when I lived in the plain states half a decade ago it seemed everybody decided that anything past 25 was playing with fire and that your uterus "Best sell by date" was in jeopardy. Then I moved to one of the big 3 cities and found out that the mindset was completely different. My wife and I decided to have a child at age 32 and she was considered a "youngster" at her clinic, where the average age of the women having kids was 40+. Of course experiences may vary, but for the most part I've gotten the impression that people from the city expect 25-35 to be career time and that it's nothing unusual to wait until after you're established to get married and have children.

P.S. - I'm not knocking rural areas. There's a charm that I miss incredibly and I'd love to be able to slow down once in a while, but it sometimes feels like a completely different world to the city.

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that maybe you're from the midwest or has family from the midwest?

I'm in the south, not much of a difference from the mid-west though. I'm seriously considering moving to the north-west.

 

[Saulkar]

25. Constantly under pressure to prove to myself that I can become an artist proper which I feel necessary in order to be satisfied yet keep forgetting that that I am physically turning into a Goliath and will likely compete at Worlds in Powerlifting within the next few years.

Odd how that works.

Power lifting is merely incidental to me as I have always been strong but I just keep getting stronger. Drawing, painting, writing, 3d modeling, and animating I have not seen any of the same progress in the same timeframe (10+ years).

 

[Natemans]

Simple thread. How old are you and how do you feel about being said age?

25. Smarter than before with less anxiety and vice, yet still shackled to student debt and occasional self-doubt.

Overall? I'm okay I guess, just wish I didn't worry all the time about money.

Thread is a go.

21. Old, but young. As for how I feel about it, meh.

 

[rosac]

24.

Currently at Uni studying to become a mental health nurse, still partying when I can, taking my sport very very seriously which I never thought would happen (used to be a warhammer painter to a high level). Already regret not using my youth to travel but at the same time I didn't have much say (Year I started my 1st degree was the year before tuition fees trebled, started nursing before the bursary was cut). I feel old as fuck compared to those on my team etc. (typical student age) but fine around my course (age range 19-45).

Main issue is that I struggle to make what I see as meaningful relationships. I can make friendships that are shallow really really easily but I'm never anyone's best friend or owt. Add in that one of my best friends who I saw as a brother has drifted away from my, not replying to messages etc. and another is in Nigeria I feel kind of isolated. Also I want to start relationships but have no idea how even when people are giving off what I think are the right signals/. I can only pull girls when I'm so smashed I don;t know who I am because of my lack of confidence.

Ironically I feel confident and happy go lucky everywhere else,to the point where several team mates have said they're jealous of how thick skinned I am, and I love my family a lot more than before.

Woah, feel weird because that's the first time I mentioned my thoughts about isolation and friendship making. Feels good to have it off my chest. Thanks escapist!

 

[Gethsemani_v1legacy]

30.

Married, 1 kid, college education, stable job as a Psychiatric Nurse, studying for my Master's degree in psychiatric nursing and am about to apply to a mentorship program for prospective leaders in health care. I can't complain about where I've ended up and feel like I've got another 35 years (at least) to really go somewhere. Sometimes I think that I might have missed out on travelling, partying etc. during my 20's, but at the same time I don't regret studying and working hard to get where I am today and I certainly don't regret that I've been in a stable relationship for the past 10 years. If 15 year old me (when I first realized I wanted to be a nurse) saw me now, I think she'd be pretty proud about where she ended up.

Also, my anxiety and my depressive episodes (not actual depressions per se) are way down since my mid-20's and that's really great.

 

[DarthCoercis]

I'm 38, and I'm totally fine with it. I don't have any of the hang-ups of teens or twenty-somethings, and I'm not starting to physically and mentally break down like the over 50s.

I'm also in a position where I can get drunk at 11am, in my underpants, on a weekday, and not be concerned about my finances or future. Life's acceptable.