Your Biggest Epic Fail
- Thread starter MercurySteam
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This, but it took one of my friends going into Voice Chat and explaining it to me before I got the idea.Sharpeye42 said:
Let me preface this by saying: It was my first day living on my own in my own apartment, and i was under ALOT of stress because my dopey girlfriend decided to make reservations for this REALLY nice restaurant on the day i was scheduled to have my parents help me move...I was late for the reservations because my parents were getting all "omiboy is all grown up" on me, and wouldn't let me leave..(Of course i didn't want them to, but every five minutes my gf was texting me with "Where the hell are you?" and was getting ticked at me)
SOOOOO i finally got out of there and tore down to the restaurant, cursing traffic the whole way and generally just getting really really stressed.
I got to the restaurant (A fondue and wine bar), and my girlfriend was ragging on me SO much that I just started drinking... I downed an entire bottle of white wine in about 10 minutes.
I was okay for about an hour. Obviously tipsy, but in good spirits.... And then...the last thing i really fully remember is that I just suddenly vomitted ALL over the table of the people sitting next to us.. Like ALL over.....Everything after that is a blur.. I obviously passed out... Woke up in the bathroom leaning over a toilet, with the ownership of the restaurant telling my girlfriend that they HAD to get me out of there...
I remember flashes of being dragged out of the restaurant, and then next thing i knew i was waking up with my head in the toilet at my brand new apartment, with my gf pissing in the bathtub because i was in the toilet. Then i passed out again again and woke up about 12 hours later, still with my head in the toilet.
Yep, that's about my most epic fail ever.
That restaurant went out of business a couple years later, and i always felt like i may have played a part in it.
SOOOOO i finally got out of there and tore down to the restaurant, cursing traffic the whole way and generally just getting really really stressed.
I got to the restaurant (A fondue and wine bar), and my girlfriend was ragging on me SO much that I just started drinking... I downed an entire bottle of white wine in about 10 minutes.
I was okay for about an hour. Obviously tipsy, but in good spirits.... And then...the last thing i really fully remember is that I just suddenly vomitted ALL over the table of the people sitting next to us.. Like ALL over.....Everything after that is a blur.. I obviously passed out... Woke up in the bathroom leaning over a toilet, with the ownership of the restaurant telling my girlfriend that they HAD to get me out of there...
I remember flashes of being dragged out of the restaurant, and then next thing i knew i was waking up with my head in the toilet at my brand new apartment, with my gf pissing in the bathtub because i was in the toilet. Then i passed out again again and woke up about 12 hours later, still with my head in the toilet.
Yep, that's about my most epic fail ever.
That restaurant went out of business a couple years later, and i always felt like i may have played a part in it.
skate boarding down steepest hill in area, after they resurfaced it, hit the only pebble on the entire slope, board stopped and my face broke my fall. My board then proceeded to roll down hill past me as I lay groaning in pain, I rolled over just in time to watch my new deck I had just purchased for newly surfaced road go under front wheel of car at the intersection of the bottom of said hill. Agony and loss all in one.
Oh dude, don't get me started. This one time, I was out drinking with my best friend, another friend, my best friends' sister and his girlfriend. I was totally in love with the sister, but she didn't love me back. So I was kinda depressive the last 2 years. But back to topic here. So we were out drinking, and I got totally smashed, so I went up to her, fell on my knees before her, started worshiping her like a goddess, kissing the ground the walked on, etc. I don't remember this, but my best friend told me afterwards. So now, she doesn't even want to talk to me. THAT'S what I call epic fail. But hey, to see it positive, now it's easier to tear her from my heart, and concentrate on this girl I met last week which is just like me, when it comes to character traits, and seems to be interested in me.
EDIT: From this day, I owed to never drink more alcohol than the "necessary" one shot I have to drink with the girlfriend of my best friend on her birthday. Or as she said:"If you don't drink vodka with me on my birthday, we don't know each other anymore."
EDIT: From this day, I owed to never drink more alcohol than the "necessary" one shot I have to drink with the girlfriend of my best friend on her birthday. Or as she said:"If you don't drink vodka with me on my birthday, we don't know each other anymore."
XD
At the Leeds Festival me and some friends decide to go on the dodgems. Bear in mind by this point we've had a fair amount of beer intake. We go up, pay for our tokens and leg it to find a car each. Success.
Now, when I was at the Download Festival a couple of years previous we did a similar thing, however at that festival a guy ran around collecting the tokens off of people, then the whole thing was started up. At Leeds, however, you slot the tokens in the front of the car. So you can imagine when the thing starts up everyone gets going and I, sitting in the corner, facing the barrier and a small group of people laughing at me, FAIL. On an epic scale. After about 30 seconds I suss out the whole token-in-car thing and get started, aiming to annihilate my friends to regain any scraps of pride I had left.
I have to admit, looking back it was pretty funny though...
At the Leeds Festival me and some friends decide to go on the dodgems. Bear in mind by this point we've had a fair amount of beer intake. We go up, pay for our tokens and leg it to find a car each. Success.
Now, when I was at the Download Festival a couple of years previous we did a similar thing, however at that festival a guy ran around collecting the tokens off of people, then the whole thing was started up. At Leeds, however, you slot the tokens in the front of the car. So you can imagine when the thing starts up everyone gets going and I, sitting in the corner, facing the barrier and a small group of people laughing at me, FAIL. On an epic scale. After about 30 seconds I suss out the whole token-in-car thing and get started, aiming to annihilate my friends to regain any scraps of pride I had left.
I have to admit, looking back it was pretty funny though...
1) When I was 4 I self stabbed myself, with the bit of the hammer used for removing nails, in the head. Nothing happened as far as I know but it's pretty hard to tell when I say something particularly dumb.
2) I was 16 playing a friendly game of rugby with school chums and I managed to break through the line and ran down the field to score a try. Seeing as no one was going to catch me, and being an arrogant 16 year old, I decided to do the leg slide try at the end just to drive the dagger in deeper. I pull off this amazing slide which was much better than any other I'd tried before. When I got up I saw why. I'd landed in a big pile of dog shit and I'd just used it for gel on my awesome move. I had crap all the way up my pants and about half way up my shirt. My antics weren't nearly as funny then, at least for me, my friends thought it was hilarious.
3) Drank half a bottle of tequila, then slammed the rest in about an hour. I was fine for a while then all of a sudden I was completely gone. I won't bore with all the details but on the way home I managed to vomit in my friend's expensive leather bag (it was lame anyway, it had a truck on it. What kind of self respecting person has a leather bag with a truck on it?), vomit all over my friend's car, vomit in some random dude's bins that were out on the street (I do not envy whoever had to tip those bad boys out), spit a glob of black stuff onto my friend's shoe when he thought I'd passed out, get naked in front of 2 of my friends and his mum because I couldn't shower by myself and threaten my friends with "inhuman revenge" if they didn't leave me alone (my actual words). All of that was epic fail but the next day was an epic win because I didn't have to clean up any of it and I had no hangover.
2) I was 16 playing a friendly game of rugby with school chums and I managed to break through the line and ran down the field to score a try. Seeing as no one was going to catch me, and being an arrogant 16 year old, I decided to do the leg slide try at the end just to drive the dagger in deeper. I pull off this amazing slide which was much better than any other I'd tried before. When I got up I saw why. I'd landed in a big pile of dog shit and I'd just used it for gel on my awesome move. I had crap all the way up my pants and about half way up my shirt. My antics weren't nearly as funny then, at least for me, my friends thought it was hilarious.
3) Drank half a bottle of tequila, then slammed the rest in about an hour. I was fine for a while then all of a sudden I was completely gone. I won't bore with all the details but on the way home I managed to vomit in my friend's expensive leather bag (it was lame anyway, it had a truck on it. What kind of self respecting person has a leather bag with a truck on it?), vomit all over my friend's car, vomit in some random dude's bins that were out on the street (I do not envy whoever had to tip those bad boys out), spit a glob of black stuff onto my friend's shoe when he thought I'd passed out, get naked in front of 2 of my friends and his mum because I couldn't shower by myself and threaten my friends with "inhuman revenge" if they didn't leave me alone (my actual words). All of that was epic fail but the next day was an epic win because I didn't have to clean up any of it and I had no hangover.
This chick I liked was playing soft ball at a feild, There was a hill and I was at the top, and I had a can of root beer in my hand, and I was on my bike so i could only steer with one hand...I wnet down the hill and hit a bump, my front wheel turned, I flipped over the handle bars of the bike, landed on my face, and my bike went soaring, smashing into the batters cage so EVERONE at the soft ball game froze and looked at me....THAT was fun lol