Man, if someone was to waltz in here unknowing of this community they might think nerd/geek culture slaughtered some users whole family and burned their house down. Ironically it's the same people who tell people to chill about getting hate boners for things. Neat!
It is neat, isn't it? I especially love those that one minute act offended by someone's choice to stereotype, and the next minute will proceed to stereotype.
"How dare you say are all ! Ugh. You're just as bad as those gamers/geeks/nerds/etc."
I swear, it's the fuckin' 80s again...
And for the record: The nerds AND the jocks were shitty people in that film. Much like today...
I'm seeing a lot of the old sentiment that we should be nice to the old, rude, exclusionary geeks because they suffered!!
No. A previous history of suffering is certainly unfortunate, but it does not excuse awful behaviour. I would suggest therapy for those people who are still struggling with things that happened years ago in school. Therapy is helpful. I'm not even trying to be a *****, here.
Geek culture was never your safe space, so getting defensive about it being 'invaded' by people who were always there is just ridiculous. (Especially considering the majority of geek culture's attitude towards safe spaces to begin with).
The problem isn't geek culture, the problem is the internet as the primary medium of geek culture and all the behavioural problems that stem from anonymity.
I've been involved in geek culture for twenty-five years, and my RL experiences of it have never been anything other than fun and inclusive, so I don't believe the problem is with geekdom itself.
I'm seeing a lot of the old sentiment that we should be nice to the old, rude, exclusionary geeks because they suffered!!
No. A previous history of suffering is certainly unfortunate, but it does not excuse awful behaviour. I would suggest therapy for those people who are still struggling with things that happened years ago in school. Therapy is helpful. I'm not even trying to be a *****, here.
If this thread is any indication, not two people can agree on what constitutes 'awful behavior'. If that Ghostbusters thread is another indication, mere disagreement constitutes 'awful behavior' for some.
Wait, what? A subculture formed by people to discuss things and hang out with people with interest in these same things and away from other subcultures that marginalize them for talking about said things is not a 'safe space'?
I don't even share the notion that subcultures can be invaded, but that flat-out makes no sense. Especially when you go out of your way to make this absolutely baseless assertion:
(Especially considering the majority of geek culture's attitude towards safe spaces to begin with)
Leaving aside the pitfall of this major generalization that is about as nuanced as the soundtrack to elephant-on-dinosaur porn, whatever of said attitude exists is because of the notion that some people invade the culture and then try to appropriate it; a point that you yourself disregarded altogether.
Bilious Green said:
The problem isn't geek culture, the problem is the internet as the primary medium of geek culture and all the behavioural problems that stem from anonymity.
I've been involved in geek culture for twenty-five years, and my RL experiences of it have never been anything other than fun and inclusive, so I don't believe the problem is with geekdom itself.
The anonymity certainly plays a part in it, but I'd argue it's the nature of the Internet (and modern society) that's the real issue. Everything moves too fast, which lends to reactionary cultures all over the place. This isn't a problem with geek culture, it's the nature of online interaction in the information age, where we consume far too much of it in as little time as possible and just comment on it at the speed of sound, before moving on to the next thing.
If this thread is any indication, not two people can agree on what constitutes 'awful behavior'. If that Ghostbusters thread is another indication, mere disagreement constitutes 'awful behavior' for some.
Well, I'm not those people. People are allowed to disagree. I, like everyone, have my own definition of 'awful behaviour', but rest assured simple disagreements don't fall under that. (Unless it's something like 'I disagree that [X group] are people')
Wait, what? A subculture formed by people to discuss things and hang out with people with interest in these same things and away from other subcultures that marginalize them for talking about said things is not a 'safe space'?
No, it's not. Not in the way people have been treating it as one. I've had people excuse guys being dicks to me for being female because, according to those people, I'm an interloper in this 'safe space'. That is the kind of safe space that nerd culture is not.
That's the kind of bullshit I'm talking about. I have no issue with people being happy and feeling safe within geek culture, I have an issue when they try to use that as a stick to beat others with.
Stewie Plisken said:
I don't even share the notion that subcultures can be invaded, but that flat-out makes no sense. Especially when you go out of your way to make this absolutely unbased assertion:
(Especially considering the majority of geek culture's attitude towards safe spaces to begin with)
Leaving aside the pitfall of this major generalization that is about as nuanced as the soundtrack to elephant-on-dinosaur porn, whatever of said attitude exists because of the notion that some people invade the culture and then try to appropriate it, a point that you yourself disregarded altogether.
When you're talking about an entire culture, yeah, I'm gonna be generalising. I don't need to #notallgeeks every sentence.
I'm of the belief that some cultures can be appropriated. Nerd culture cannot be. If you disagree, fine. I'm not really in the mood to have a big back-and-forth, but yeah. Agree to disagree.
Well, I used to think of it as a sort broad hobbyist community akin to the model railway crowd - the domain of tinkerers. Now whenever I hear the word culture in relation to geeks or nerds I instead imagine the kind of culture you scrape off a yogurt lid after a week behind the heater at a public school and is instead full of people wound tighter than knock-off Swiss clocks.
I don't want it to go away or die, I want it to chill the fuck out.
Saying that the culture should die isn't going to win anybody anything, including you. Being a part of something good is better than shouting at something as though it is beneath you.
I think you may have misread StatusNil's comment, because your response seems to be one that would be for a comment taking the exact opposite stance of what he said.
I don't see how taking issue with the fact many faux-nerds are openly hostile towards nerds is a problem, and I don't see how being positive about a problem helps fix that problem when only one sides wants the problem solved, and it's not the side with the numerical advantage. Or at least the mobilization advantage, since we don't really know what the numbers are due to one group being highly sociable while the other is anything but.
I was actually agreeing with StatusNil and speaking to anyone that thinks that nerd/geek culture should die. Being positive helps because this is a community, not a war. Exclusion is what is causing the friction. Exclusion because you aren't a "real" nerd, or exclusion because you exhibit social ineptitude. It isn't a war, the fact is we are all here because we have all found it fun to enjoy the same media.
This isn't a numbers war or a popularity contest, it is equal parts cultural study and psychology. Being inclusive has no drawbacks for either side but it does require the effort of seeking understanding and tolerance. Judgement is not a valuable tool here but some are quick to use it on both sides of StatusNil's coin.
If we can all coexist well together, we get cool movies, comics, and games as rewards as the budgets for such things will increase and the quality will go up. If we bicker and try to tear each other down, there is nothing positive. Actually, if that is your intention, I don't know if you actually know what it is like to be part of nerd/geek culture. I don't know why you would want to attack something you love so much unless you value it less than you admit.
Considering I've never been much part of any other subculture (and even saying I'm "part of the geek culture" is stretching it), I can't say how much this is a problem in, say, wrestling or sports fandoms, but IMO the core of the problem is this:
Nerd culture is a culture that thrives on passion. Collect more comics, more video games, more merchandise. Look, have you got this super exclusive 25th anniversary 7-disc bluray of that one movie you like? Get that too! Have you been to E3 this year? What about Gamescom, PAX, Quakecon etc.? The more passionate the fans, the more lucrative the business will be, as more media, merchandise and stuff can be marketed for them. It's a seemingly win-win situation: geeks get more of what they want, and businesses thrive. But this passion has a dark side, and its name is fanboyism. In a world of forums, user groups, subreddits and other closed groups of like-minded individuals it's easy to find oneself in an echo chamber. A place where everyone agrees with everyone within that particular system, and feeds each others' beliefs that yes, Nintendo IS indeed the best at everything, that Marvel IS indeed the absolute pinnacle of comic books movies from here to eternity, video games ARE in fact the highest form of art and so on. When this bubble bursts, or the individual steps out of the echo chamber, full of confidence in that their stances and beliefs are right, the feeling when someone calls Nintendo a pile of hacks recycling the same formula for decades on end can provoke a senseless reaction, leading to ad hominems, harassment, twitter feuds and other petty shit. Hence why so many people say geek culture is full of assholes.
As many have said, it's not fundamentally a geek problem, but a human problem. It's just that geek culture might reinforce those harmful aspects of humanity more strongly than other subcultures: at least in sports you do get to see the other teams' supporters and you do get to see your team lose. On the internet however, it's much too easy to just shut that stuff out.
This thread shows the same sentiment that led to those Gamers are Dead articles - Geeks are selfish and savage losers with terrible social skills and a history of being bullied. Luckily there is a more enlightened, empathic and progressive elite, who can lead the way to a more civilised geek culture. Any resistance is a sign of bigotry and intolerance, as the geeks should be grateful for the chance to be educated and made better.
It's all just class warfare and people feeling uncomfortable about sharing hobbies with people they feel are inferior.
To step into nerd culture just to berate those who are in it seems really pretentious and no doubt means you are probably a major source of negativity and thereby toxicity in the community.
Is there anyone who does this though? From where I am standing, as a self-proclaimed geek of almost 2 decades, it seems as if the main sources of toxicity are the hardcore geeks, who act as self-proclaimed gatekeepers to keep those they don't consider invested enough in the culture out of it. This vocal minority will dismiss an entire gender as not being geek enough (Fake Gamer Girls), they will attack media critics for wanting to analyze the content of their hobbies (Sarkeesian and anyone who's ever written a post-colonial blog/op ed on gaming/comics/nerd culture), they will hate on developers for not listening to fans and will hate on developers because they listened to fans. They will hate developers for not being innovative enough and they will hate developers for "changing the formula too much". They will rage on about how their hobbies and cultures needs "standards" because otherwise any old pleb with a passing interest might think that they are actually welcome into the hobby. They are so afraid of their hobby changing and new people that aren't exactly like them joining their hobby that they are ready to exercise scorched earth tactics via all manners of harassment, ruining the reputation of the hobby in the process. And then, just to top it all off, they have the hypocrisy to claim that they are unfairly judged because of their hobby.
For a long time I fought hard to be accepted by those people, thinking it'd make me a "real gamer". But in the end, I want to share my hobby with others. I want others to realize what's so great about gaming, sci-fi, fantasy, roleplaying, collectible card games, board games and all these other things that can make my spare time so amazing. So these days I spend less time engaging with the broader community in favor of being a positive voice in the small community I am a part off. I know I am not alone in wanting to make geek culture a more inclusive place, but the vocal minority that is the regressive old guard have the ability to drown out almost all other conversation and they are not worth my time.
This thread shows the same sentiment that led to those Gamers are Dead articles - Geeks are selfish and savage losers with terrible social skills and a history of being bullied. Luckily there is a more enlightened, empathic and progressive elite, who can lead the way to a more civilised geek culture. Any resistance is a sign of bigotry and intolerance, as the geeks should be grateful for the chance to be educated and made better.
It's all just class warfare and people feeling uncomfortable about sharing hobbies with people they feel are inferior.
...the irony here is that the Gamers are Dead articles were about how a specific subset of gamers were ruining the hobby for the rest of us by being elitist, gatekeeping pricks who harassed the hell out of anyone who disagreed with their narrow views.
So... yeah. Fun Fact of the Day.
Anyway, onto bigger fish.
...literally.
StatusNil said:
The "nerd/geek culture" of today... isn't.
See, what the words basically mean is a certain lack of social graces, combined with an intense preoccupation with a number of niche interests. Really we're talking about the higher functioning parts of the autism spectrum. And when it comes to popular culture, this frequently means people who have a real need for structure in their fantasies. That's their comfort zone in a world that frequently appears chaotic and arbitrary. Hence the importance of "canonicity" of story elements, and the inflexibility when it comes to messing with it. "Nerds/geeks" crave consistency instead of "fresh new takes" because they're not good at adapting on the fly. That's why they're those things in the first place. And that's why the relationship between the "core" (longtime, not "just a-phase") fans of things like superhero comics and their producers is inescapably fraught.
Meanwhile, the whole notion of "nerd/geek culture" is that of a socially self-aware playing with "geeky" elements. It's "I'm such a BIG NERD I had a cartoon character tattooed on my ass, LOL!" And such awareness is of course the hallmark of the ironic posture. It's a lower tier of cool for those who didn't make it to impeccably hip: hip-sterism. That's the domain of socialites like "Queen of Geeks, Felicia Day!" "But why is she the Queen? What has she made that was so great?" "Dude, she's like totally hip to what's cool in teh geek scene, so we all must love her! AND she hangs out with Wesley from Star Trek!" "But everybody always hated Wesley..." "Shut up, dudemeister is a GEEK ICON, he can totally laugh about himself!"
And that's the major internal contradiction in this alleged "nerd/geek culture". It's dominated by socially adept hipsters who have learned to ironically embrace "geeky" signifiers, building "fandoms" predicated on sociability. And these hipsters have zero empathy, in fact a burning contempt, for the authentically dysfunctional "nerds" who sincerely cling to their favorite pop culture products for comfort. "Like, how GAUCHE is taking this shit SERIOUSLY, man?" This is in fact much of what this very thread is saying. "Nerd/geek culture is cool, except for all the TOXIC nerds who give it a bad name!"
Well, that "toxicity" is largely a backlash of marginalized (yes) people with limited social skills to what amounts to a highly disrespectful takeover of all their favorite things by fickle trendies. Of course, even the OG "geeks" don't OWN these cultural forms. But if the substance of the new "nerd/geek" culture is to deliberately target the real nerds/geeks by appropriating what they helped build and "subverting its tropes" as a Grand Stand against their supposedly "exclusionary entitlement", it doesn't take a genius Social Scientist to understand why it might appear riven with hostilities great and small. The culturally sensitive thing is to Build Moar, Misappropriate Less. Or simply deign to treat this Lower Class of "dumpster fire" folks with some respect, even if they cramp your style with their uncouth enthusiasms.
...You know, I've never understood the 'geeks are insular/socially inept' thing. Because... fuck man, have you met older geeks? They LOVE being social. Can't get enough of it. 40, 50 year old geeks have been some of the most social people I've ever met, telling me stories of how they organized all these geeky things pre-internet by sending letters or putting up posters outside Star Wars screenings. When the internet hit they talk of how they started forums and websites so they could tell even MORE people about all these cool nerdy things with all these people who hadn't heard about it or weren't born yet. Who'd talk for hours to anyone who'd listen about how awesome all these geeky things were and that 'hey maybe you should totally check these things out they're fucking awesome!'. Who were all so excited to see how new people coming into geekdom would bring new things or look at things differently or create new things. Who just... didn't fit the 'anti-social' identity Geekdom clings to like a rash.
Like... I dunno. It doesn't feel like new geeks are 'appropriating' things. Someone rocking a Force Awakens shirt talking about Captain America ain't no different to someone rocking a New Hope shirt squeeing over the latest comic release. The insular, anti-social identity of geeks has never felt like the identity of 'Geekdom' - just something applied to Geekdom by people who didn't care, and something taken in by people who were anti-social to begin with. Passion is something far more characteristic of Geeks, and that passion often led them to be really fucking social. Hell, Geeks have been doing conventions and meetups for decades, for the sole purpose of getting together and chatting about all this totally cool shit that people are doing. New people getting into Geekdom aren't 'Hipsters' appropriating shit, they're just more geeks keen on the cool shit that is labeled 'Geeky' for whatever reason.
And the kickback against toxicity isn't something new either. There's always been a push against toxic people in the community. Much like how Geekdom is so much bigger now, the pushback is as well. And it's not targeted at the anti-social or insular geeks, it's targeted at the ones who are... well, toxic. Those who gatekeep the community ('Oh, you haven't read ALL of the Captain America comics? The fuck you wearing the shirt for then?' - actual thing someone has said to me), those who harass, those who attack and demand that No, This Is Theirs and Not Yours. It's not Hipsters vs. Anti-Socials, it's Geeks vs. Assholes. Members of a community against those who fuck it up for the rest of us.
I dunno. As said on the first page, it feels like there's this misanthropic identity with Geeks that just doesn't gel with geekdom. Both because of the steady expansion of geekdom, and because geeks just... aren't bad people. Certainly got a fair degree of fuckheads involved (The internet has been both kind and cruel to Geekdom) but burning everything down because of the fuckheads doesn't do much good. Can certainly understand people having the idea of it being a dumpster fire though (and seriously, if you guys have a problem with what Phasmal said, why not... you know, quote her or something? This passive-aggressive approach makes no sense), since close-quarters contact with assholes can spoil the taste of a lot of things.
...Hence my stance of 'Fuck Gatekeepers and harassers right in their shitty faces'.
To step into nerd culture just to berate those who are in it seems really pretentious and no doubt means you are probably a major source of negativity and thereby toxicity in the community.
Is there anyone who does this though? From where I am standing, as a self-proclaimed geek of almost 2 decades, it seems as if the main sources of toxicity are the hardcore geeks, who act as self-proclaimed gatekeepers to keep those they don't consider invested enough in the culture out of it. This vocal minority will dismiss an entire gender as not being geek enough (Fake Gamer Girls)
"Fake Gamer Girls" isn't the "dismissal of an entire gender", it's just a manifestation of wannabes/try hards/posers/etc.
you see in practically all "alternative" cultures. Basically people with a teenie bopper mentality trying to be "accepted" into a perceived social group (for whatever reason) by conforming and changing themselves in order to "fit in", which are then looked down upon/rejected by which ever group they're try to be accepted in because they don't come across as genuine/"being themselves"/etc.
To step into nerd culture just to berate those who are in it seems really pretentious and no doubt means you are probably a major source of negativity and thereby toxicity in the community.
Is there anyone who does this though? From where I am standing, as a self-proclaimed geek of almost 2 decades, it seems as if the main sources of toxicity are the hardcore geeks, who act as self-proclaimed gatekeepers to keep those they don't consider invested enough in the culture out of it. This vocal minority will dismiss an entire gender as not being geek enough (Fake Gamer Girls)
"Fake Gamer Girls" isn't the "dismissal of an entire gender", it's just a manifestation of wannabes/try hards/posers/etc.
you see in practically all "alternative" cultures. Basically people with a teenie bopper mentality trying to be "accepted" into a perceived social group (for whatever reason) by conforming and changing themselves in order to "fit in", which are then looked down upon/rejected by which ever group they're try to be accepted in because they don't come across as genuine/"being themselves"/etc.
Yeah, sure, then how come every single girl I know who plays games has had to put up with this bullshit?
I've been told repeatedly I don't look like I play games (what does that look like?). When I bought my PS4 the guy automatically assumed it was for my boyfriend.
Hell, my friend who is also female got asked if she was a Fallout fan by the guy behind the counter at the midnight launch of Fallout 4.
I really don't think it's just a coincidence that so many women get this kind of treatment.
To step into nerd culture just to berate those who are in it seems really pretentious and no doubt means you are probably a major source of negativity and thereby toxicity in the community.
Is there anyone who does this though? From where I am standing, as a self-proclaimed geek of almost 2 decades, it seems as if the main sources of toxicity are the hardcore geeks, who act as self-proclaimed gatekeepers to keep those they don't consider invested enough in the culture out of it. This vocal minority will dismiss an entire gender as not being geek enough (Fake Gamer Girls)
"Fake Gamer Girls" isn't the "dismissal of an entire gender", it's just a manifestation of wannabes/try hards/posers/etc.
you see in practically all "alternative" cultures. Basically people with a teenie bopper mentality trying to be "accepted" into a perceived social group (for whatever reason) by conforming and changing themselves in order to "fit in", which are then looked down upon/rejected by which ever group they're try to be accepted in because they don't come across as genuine/"being themselves"/etc.
Yeah, sure, then how come every single girl I know who plays games has had to put up with this bullshit?
I've been told repeatedly I don't look like I play games (what does that look like?). When I bought my PS4 the guy automatically assumed it was for my boyfriend.
Hell, my friend who is also female got asked if she was a Fallout fan by the guy behind the counter at the midnight launch of Fallout 4.
I really don't think it's just a coincidence that so many women get this kind of treatment.
I wouldn't say it's a "coincidence", it's just not something unique to gaming, it's systemic of wider society. You have girls being brought up with the whole "queen bees and wannabes"/"conformity is acceptance" mentality, plus mainstream media's constant portrait of "alternative" cultures as being male dominated to the point people find the concept of a female being interest in it alien.
To step into nerd culture just to berate those who are in it seems really pretentious and no doubt means you are probably a major source of negativity and thereby toxicity in the community.
Is there anyone who does this though? From where I am standing, as a self-proclaimed geek of almost 2 decades, it seems as if the main sources of toxicity are the hardcore geeks, who act as self-proclaimed gatekeepers to keep those they don't consider invested enough in the culture out of it. This vocal minority will dismiss an entire gender as not being geek enough (Fake Gamer Girls)
"Fake Gamer Girls" isn't the "dismissal of an entire gender", it's just a manifestation of wannabes/try hards/posers/etc.
you see in practically all "alternative" cultures. Basically people with a teenie bopper mentality trying to be "accepted" into a perceived social group (for whatever reason) by conforming and changing themselves in order to "fit in", which are then looked down upon/rejected by which ever group they're try to be accepted in because they don't come across as genuine/"being themselves"/etc.
...so it's just sheer magical coincidence it's called 'Fake Gamer Girls' rather than 'Fake Geeks' or 'Fake Gamer Guys', yeah? Nothing gendered about that at all.
Besides, how the fuck do you even be a 'genuine' geek? Pretty sure the... for lack of a better word 'requirements' for being one is 'Did you like this thing? Are you interested in this thing? Yes? Welcome to the club!'. It's about as exclusive as a public toilet, so gatekeeping based on gender and 'genuineness' really makes no sense.
...plus, like, women have been geeks/gamers from the very start, so 'fake gamer girl' is really such a dumb thing to think is real.
Getting a bit off-topic, but that could be argued. It's a culture of honor killing when a foreign does it, and it's a one-off senseless tragedy when it's one of Us, motives and numbers notwithstanding.
I do not so much like a lot of the people it produces.
I love the idea of the underdog as much as the next person, but the reality isn't quite so sympathetic.
Turns out, if you gather up the outcasts, the misfits and the maladjusted and mash them all together the outcome actually isn't all that pretty. You get a whole lot of unhealthy, unhappy, immature, terminally bitter folks of questionable mental condition who never got over being bullied in high school and have chosen to define themselves by their preferences in entertainment media.
Many of them probably ended up the way they are through no fault of their own, but that doesn't make the end result any less unpleasant to be around.
This isn't to say "geek culture" is somehow worse than other cultures. I mean, people fucking die in riots over sport. It just means geek culture has its own brand of awfulness which I refuse to tolerate just because no corpses have shown up with "fake geek girl" etched into their foreheads... yet.
As I'd brought up in the other thread, why make the distinction then? What possible purpose does it serve other than to single out a single demographic as being wholly responsible? Are we not better served by only targeting those who are behaving poorly, rather than broadly accusing an entire, tangentially-associated group? As I'd said, yes there have been instances of sports fans going full mental and rioting over a lost game. But I would never use that as an example for the claim "sports culture is toxic and needs to die". So why do we use instances of bad behavior by some geeks as a rallying cry for the death of 'geek culture' as a whole? To me it feels just as demeaning and exclusionary as 'geeks' are portrayed as behaving.
I guess I just don't understand the hypocritical nature of todays culture/counter-culture mindset.
Err... did you just quote me twice in two threads on the same subject?
I'm happy to discuss/debate this with you, but can we please keep it to one thread? Otherwise I'm going to get awfully confused.
Anyway, so...
I am only talking about the people who are behaving poorly. I said "a lot of the people", not "all of the people" or even "most of the people".
If some geeky fellow out there is happily playing WH40K, reading Batman comics and debating the finer points of Dune or whatever then I have no problem with that guy. More power to him. I'm not talking about that guy.
Hell, if our hypothetical geek is fat and depressed and lonely while playing WH40K and reading Batman comics then, well, that's a shame and it would probably be in his own best interests to make some changes but so long as he isn't taking it out on other people then I still don't have a problem with him.
As for the "rallying cry for the death of geek culture as a whole"... umm... I didn't saying anything along those lines. In fact I said I like a lot of the stuff it produces. I probably count as a part of geek culture myself (depends on how you define it of course, it's a rather nebulous thing after all.)
If cries for the extermination of geek culture are your issue then you're going to have to take it up with someone who is saying that.
"Fake Gamer Girls" isn't the "dismissal of an entire gender", it's just a manifestation of wannabes/try hards/posers/etc.
you see in practically all "alternative" cultures. Basically people with a teenie bopper mentality trying to be "accepted" into a perceived social group (for whatever reason) by conforming and changing themselves in order to "fit in", which are then looked down upon/rejected by which ever group they're try to be accepted in because they don't come across as genuine/"being themselves"/etc.
I am pretty sure that what you are describing is pretty much every teenager (and many adults) ever when they find a new hobby. You realize something is fun or interesting so you start hanging out with the people that do it or feel the same thing and in the process you try to fit into that social group, by adopting stuff like speech symbols ("pwnd", "lol" etc.), manners, attitudes and the like. What you are describing is every socialization process ever and is a perfectly normal occurrence in society as a whole. That some parts of geek culture somehow views this as posing or "faking it" says a lot about those regressive and shitty parts of geekdom.
I'd also like to concur with Phasmal on this. I've been gaming since I was 6 and even now, some 23 years down the line, I am still met with skepticism by other (exclusively male) "geeks". From hearing I am "too beautiful" to be a gamer to being told that girls don't actually play Magic to being told I was a fake gamer girl for wearing a Fallout shirt. It is not a coincidence that we get this treatment, and it is perfectly in line with the casual misogyny in some parts of geek culture.
I wouldn't say it's a "coincidence", it's just not something unique to gaming, it's systemic of wider society. You have girls being brought up with the whole "queen bees and wannabes"/"conformity is acceptance" mentality, plus mainstream media's constant portrait of "alternative" cultures as being male dominated to the point people find the concept of a female being interest in it alien.
Bear in mind, I'm a girl, kinda have been for 26 years nearly now. And I dunno what you're on about with this.
And yeah, mainstream media does portray geekdom as some sausagefest, but mainstream media isn't telling my friends to 'watch out' because I might not really like the things I like, or suggesting that my boyfriend got my achievements for me. Nerd dudes are the ones doing that.
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