Zero Punctuation: Bayonetta
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
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I still hate this fucking game.
The dialoge alone was enough to make me ride my bike through a snow storm in order to return it.
Plus, 70% of the time when an enemy appears you get a cutscene, and you get attack the micro-second it ends. If I had a nickel for every cheap shot this game gave me, I'd...................well, I'd atleast have 5 bucks.
The dialoge alone was enough to make me ride my bike through a snow storm in order to return it.
Plus, 70% of the time when an enemy appears you get a cutscene, and you get attack the micro-second it ends. If I had a nickel for every cheap shot this game gave me, I'd...................well, I'd atleast have 5 bucks.
never played god of war so im assuming herehayashi38 said:
but doesn't god of war do it right... i.e. make QTEs an expected part of gameplay?
i think the point in both this review (and the regular escapist review) is that the events come out of no where
hilarious review but since i dont play devil may cry im not really caring about this one either
Just clearing it up for you, but God of War never had QTEs. QTEs, IMO, are "Press button or die." What God of War had is "You CAN press these buttons to defeat monsters easier or kill the boss." The thing is, QTEs in games SURPRISES you and you die because of being not alert, and God of War's Simon Says are done to make things easier or to progress, and those are optional and you CHOOSE if you want to do it and not be surprised out of your arse.hayashi38 said:
Looks like he reviewed the PS3 version as the 360 one has hardly any loads at all.
Apart from that its pretty much nail on the head, shame things like the weapons/combat details were ignored in favour of takin the mick out of a game that does not take itself seriously for the crime of..... Not taking itself seriously.......
Oh and then there is quick time events....... Sure they are a pain in the backside but the gripe about "I want todo what the cutscene did" used DMC4 is null and void with Bayonetta as you CAN do what the cutscene did (the outlandish style of the cutscenes is representative of what the character is able to preform unlike in DMC4).
What do you want a game about killing angels todo in a cutscene with an angel that you are going to kill or have killed? Secondly how impressive would a cutscene be if all it displayed was moves you could do yourself exactly as you could do them? There would be no point to having the cutscene at all in that case, unless it contained no action at all. I suppose your idea of a cinematic is for the characters to take a break for a cuppa tea and a piss between fights?
You cannot criticise an action game for having cinematic's that revolve around action, that's like complaining that a can of Pepsi contains Pepsi.
Apart from that its pretty much nail on the head, shame things like the weapons/combat details were ignored in favour of takin the mick out of a game that does not take itself seriously for the crime of..... Not taking itself seriously.......
Oh and then there is quick time events....... Sure they are a pain in the backside but the gripe about "I want todo what the cutscene did" used DMC4 is null and void with Bayonetta as you CAN do what the cutscene did (the outlandish style of the cutscenes is representative of what the character is able to preform unlike in DMC4).
What do you want a game about killing angels todo in a cutscene with an angel that you are going to kill or have killed? Secondly how impressive would a cutscene be if all it displayed was moves you could do yourself exactly as you could do them? There would be no point to having the cutscene at all in that case, unless it contained no action at all. I suppose your idea of a cinematic is for the characters to take a break for a cuppa tea and a piss between fights?
You cannot criticise an action game for having cinematic's that revolve around action, that's like complaining that a can of Pepsi contains Pepsi.
If the games story is confusing, then this review really isn't all that much better in this respect. Yahtzee says a lot of different things both negative and positive (mostly negative). But he never actually deals with the question of whether the game is actually good or not.
He also didn't get the facts quite right. Sega didn't actually make the game. They just ported it over to the PS3 and did a spectacularly bad job of it. It's a shame because the PS3 is perfectly capable of matching and/or surpassing the 360 version but Sega royally screwed up the job.
Don't get me wrong. Sega is by no means an enemy of the PS3. Games like Valkyria Chronicles and Yakuza 3 are proof enough of that. But I guess the Bayonetta fiasco also proves that as far as PS3 development is concerned Sega still has much to learn.
I guess Yahtzee made the same mistake here as he did when he reviewed The Force Unleashed. He didn't research the differences between the versions.
Anyway, I think that Mass Effect 2 is the most likely choice for next week.
From the looks of the release dates both Dante's Inferno and White Knight Chronicles seem unlikely. And he's probably not going to go anywhere near MAG for obvious reasons.
He also didn't get the facts quite right. Sega didn't actually make the game. They just ported it over to the PS3 and did a spectacularly bad job of it. It's a shame because the PS3 is perfectly capable of matching and/or surpassing the 360 version but Sega royally screwed up the job.
Don't get me wrong. Sega is by no means an enemy of the PS3. Games like Valkyria Chronicles and Yakuza 3 are proof enough of that. But I guess the Bayonetta fiasco also proves that as far as PS3 development is concerned Sega still has much to learn.
I guess Yahtzee made the same mistake here as he did when he reviewed The Force Unleashed. He didn't research the differences between the versions.
Anyway, I think that Mass Effect 2 is the most likely choice for next week.
From the looks of the release dates both Dante's Inferno and White Knight Chronicles seem unlikely. And he's probably not going to go anywhere near MAG for obvious reasons.
Regarding the "ridiculously oversexualized" thingy, here's the trailer for the game, in which baynetta.... Kills a doppelganger through pulling a centaur thrugh her vagina or sumthin, i dunno what it's supposed to be really that japanese imagination is just too sick for me.
http://www.gametrailers.com/user-movie/bayonetta-not-so-subtle-gameplay/333902
http://www.gametrailers.com/user-movie/bayonetta-not-so-subtle-gameplay/333902
Good luck on getting borderlands working, it would be interesting to see especially with yahtzees tendency to hate rpgs (or was that just jrpgs?).
Oh, and by the way, no Borderlands please, it would take less than a minute to mention any of it features, pros and cons.
Loading times was my main quarrel with the game since I was going in expecting the ridiculous. While I'm glad to see there will be a patch to let you install the game coming out for the PS3, I sometimes miss the days when a console game had to get it right the first time and not plan to patch it at a future date.
MUST ... BREAK ... NEWS ... BEFORE ... 360 ... FAN ... BOY!
It loads faster on the 360, as annoying as that is =/
It loads faster on the 360, as annoying as that is =/