Zero Punctuation: Bulletstorm
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
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I loved that he called the kick, "using your MIGHTY BOOT".
It reminded me of sunny days in my youth when I did not go outside.
It reminded me of sunny days in my youth when I did not go outside.
Good thing, that warning. That was bizarre =|LordOrin said:He references it in the credits ("I LOST MY HEART AND VARIOUS OTHER THINGS TO A STARSHIP TROOPER"):Pikey Mikey said:what song?LordOrin said:Augh! Thanks Yahtzee, now I'm going to have that song stuck in my head for another 5 years
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TL6MAyTXMRA
Warning: the 70s were WEIRD!
i loled the second i saw that! perfect yahtzee style one liner XDTrue Nero said:
awesome review yahtzee! imo your funniest yet!
Eh, Yahtzee has a point. Bulletstorm falls somewhere between mass-slaughterfest and QUICK TAKE COVER in design, but that's not a good place to be. It ends up half-assing both of them. I enjoyed the characters, I enjoyed the dialogue, I enjoyed the fact that he knocks his own ass out once an hour at the very least because he's such a moron, but I didn't really enjoy the combat so much, which is the entirety of the gameplay apart from the odd setpiece.
In short, I had a lot of fun, but I'm sure not going to replay it. Epic should stop stuffing Gears into places they don't belong.
In short, I had a lot of fun, but I'm sure not going to replay it. Epic should stop stuffing Gears into places they don't belong.
Fun video
Maybe I've not had my coffee this morning but... can someone explain the wearing a bin comment to me?
Maybe I've not had my coffee this morning but... can someone explain the wearing a bin comment to me?
I think I am done caring about his reviews. It seems like he complains just to complain. I honestly love the game, and thought that after his complaining that he would enjoy the feel of it. But he isn't happy with anything so I am done. I guess a guy constantly complaining can only be entertaining for a little bit.
Nice article.NathanS said:
Oblige + ZDoom2 + Aeons of Death
Excellent.Really? I thought it was spectacularly predictable that he would relate Bulletstorm to Painkiller and think 'No'. His disappointment echoes what he's always said about modern shooters.Thomas Guy said:
Probably because better graphics demanded making use of them, tilting everything towards realism.misterprickly said:
"Realistic"? Honestly? Realistic games incredibly thin on the ground, jeez, give me some more I say. How on earth is GoW realistic, or Bulletstorm? They're about as realistic as the third Rambo movie ... no actually, much LESS realistic. As someone who enjoys realistic games (and has to search around like a detective for them, the unrealistic games I enjoy also, but much less) I find it mildly offensive, it'd be like me saying "I'm sick of all this tasty food!" and you replying "all we have are rocks and the odd piece of corn we pick out of the sewer". But hey, unrealistic games sell
You realize that the entire point to ZP is to ruthlessly rage on whatever game happens to be crossing his path, right? Honestly, his videos are 6 minute long sprees of vitriol because anger is the easiest button to push on the day to day Escapist denizen. It's not "another panning", it's ZP where it's all pans all the time.[footnote]And before someone jumps me on it, yes he has given positive rambles to games (Painkiller and Saintsrow 2 most notably, since he keeps referencing them) but here's the rub; Those games, for whatever reason, rubbed Yahtzee "the right way". Opinions, kickbacks, snobbish non-mainstream attitude, whatever. They're no less flawed than Bulletstorm or any other game he pisses on, he just keeps his criticism saved for a small addendum at the end of the clip to hide that it's still shit.halofreak123 said:
Painkiller - The story is entirely needless and entirely forgotten during actual gameplay but you wouldn't think it how the way cinematics bang on and on emptying huge wastebins filled with half-baked expositional dialogue onto our screaming faces because they were determined to crowbar this shit in somewhere... the storyline can go fuck itself.[/footnote]
By your logic, since everyone seems to have such a nerd-on for classic era games, moving past 8 bit graphics was a mistake. The medium develops and with it the means and talent that can go into them. Saying "Baww, it's pretty so obviously that's why I didn't like it, they spend more time on the graphics than the 'fun'" doesn't suggest a decline in developer priorities, it's an indication that you won't like every game that comes out, even if they're from your favorite genre. If they can make something look great now in the same time it would have taken them to make something look good three years ago, why are you crapping on their initiative to do so?Marik Bentusi said:
OT: While I realize arguing against a ZP is about as effective a waste of time as you can get... I'm bored and I enjoy Bulletstorm so what the hell, I'll point out where he's just plain wrong.
On Realism[footnote]The human enemies are resembling your co-workers, in-laws and probation officers, with their mohawks, tatoos and piercings... wait what?[/footnote]
So sliding twelve feet on your ass and still having enough momentum to send someone end over end with your boot is...
So being able to kick someone across a hotel lobby is...
So being able to put a rope around someone's neck and pull them to you from two stories up is...
So PCF's attempt to have 50% of the color spectrum onscreen at any one time was...
So being able to steer a bullet in flight or separate someone's funzone from the rest of their body, kick a mine without it exploding, slowing time to launch someone into the air then light them on fire and cut them in half is... (and the killer thing is he mentions all of this later on so I'm not sure if he's "taking the piss" or he wrote each half of the episode on two separate days)
On chest-high walls
First, yes there are chest-high walls, but there is no GoW cover system, or ANY cover system for that matter. The environments would be pretty barren without crap littered all over the place (some less chest-high-ier than others) and ducking behind a wall not to get your ass blown off isn't a tired mechanic, it's limiting the chance of getting a superfluous new orifice. They don't need to put platforms covering all the bottomless pits in Mario, you need to jump.
On pacing
There's an entire game mode where you are being timed and rewarded for completing the stage quickly. Who exactly is playing to suggest that Bulletstorm is slow paced? Mice become slow paced if you put them in a freezer first. There's nothing to inhibit you from having a guns-blazing firepower romp through each level. Going on to complain that "enemies don't line up for the charged shots" kind of takes the piss when your kick and leash are all there in order to change how enemies line up, not to mention circle strafing and sliding. The game just won't hold your hand while you do it and the AI isn't as retarded as all hell.