Zero Punctuation: Burnout: Paradise

[Sylocat]

The game takes place in a strange post-apocalyptic future, where advanced sat-nav systems have resulted in a race of murderous sentient cars, and the only surviving human being is an insane DJ calling himself Atomica, who spends his nights running around setting up ramps everywhere, and his days holed up in a radio station trying to talk the cars into destroying themselves, so that he might one day reclaim society.

That may have been a sarcastic rewrite of the game's plot, Yahtzee, but it actually sounds like a pretty cool idea for a game on its own.
Who here would love to play a game that actually HAD that storyline?

EDIT: Oh, and by the way, I'd just like to mention that the drawing Yahtzee did of Atomica was quite possibly the funniest character rendition he's drawn yet.

 

[sonicliam]

The UK now hates you, I think.

well im from the UK and i dnt hate him so if u mean the actual ground of UK hates him then u are wrong

 

[randomjoe333333]

Wow no SSBB this week? what a surprise....


btw Gaming Macht Frei was unbelievably hilarious!

Australia wont be getting ssbb for a while lets just say Australia is living in the past

 

[Bombader]

Releases tend to follow the trend of Japan > USA > Everyone Else

Especially when they come from Japan

 

[tkdking]

Burnout is an mazing game, and i agree about the apocolyptic version of DJ atomica being the only human

 

[Dectilon]

Releases tend to follow the trend of Japan > USA > Everyone Else

Especially when they come from Japan

Actually, it's Taiwan > Japan > USA > Everyone Else, regardless of where it's made to begin with

 

[tkdking]

Phew! And here was me worrying for a second that EA might have actually made a half decent game...

Ambition:
The UK now hates you, I think.[/quote

Seriously man, Diana was years ago. Not being able to let go and still be upset about that would be like America still being angry and upset about 9/11... ah... well, we ain't the US.

That's just slightly offensive. I'm not usually one to not be able to let things go, but comparing Princess Di's death to the worst terrorist attack in the world?

The fact that you think 9/11 is the biggest terrorist act ever just shows how ignorant you really are.

I wouldnt say that any of you are wrong, but Di's death was a while ago, and the U.S. isnt still stuck in the past, so, in my opinion, just leavee the peple be, and dont talk shit about yahtzee man, he awesome ! !

 

[m_jim]

Phew! And here was me worrying for a second that EA might have actually made a half decent game...

Ambition:
The UK now hates you, I think.[/quote

Seriously man, Diana was years ago. Not being able to let go and still be upset about that would be like America still being angry and upset about 9/11... ah... well, we ain't the US.

That's just slightly offensive. I'm not usually one to not be able to let things go, but comparing Princess Di's death to the worst terrorist attack in the world?

The fact that you think 9/11 is the biggest terrorist act ever just shows how ignorant you really are.

I wouldnt say that any of you are wrong, but Di's death was a while ago, and the U.S. isnt still stuck in the past, so, in my opinion, just leavee the peple be, and dont talk shit about yahtzee man, he awesome ! !

Noting recent trends in the ZP forums, I propose a parallel to Godwin's Law. Jim's Law: "Regardless of topic, as a ZP forum gets longer and longer, the probability of someone bringing up 9/11 or denigrating US foreign policy goes to one."

 

[Strafe Mcgee]

Is it just me, or am I the only one that actually likes paradise? It's not without flaws and Yahtzee is bang on the money with his review, but I think it's great fun smashing things to bits and racing around the city finding new places to jump, smash and race. Yahtzee's always really harsh on games, it's what makes his reviews so funny and memorable.

But paradise is fun. Argue or flame me if you wish, but I don't care, cos I think I'm right

 

[Blayze]

If Yahtzee thinks Burnout: Paradise hates players, imagine what would happen if he reviewed I Wanna Be The Guy.

 

[VeryOblivious]

VeryOblivious - "losing faith" is a figure of speech you moron, not that i was part of some yahtzee cult. Anyway, shouldnt you be off picking out spelling errors on some other forum?, seems like your part of that kind of idiot forum demographic.
Pifft

I didn't pick out spelling errors. Read again, lad.

 

[Lee Christie]

(Note: This reply isn't directed at one particular poster, but the people in the Diana discussion.)

I (like the herculean exemplar) am British and that was funny. Although I'm aware national stereotypes are usually self-invented and may not be accurate, we like to think we have a sense of humour. If you can't laugh at something just because it's slightly politically incorrect, grow up. We and the rest of the world were all sad when we lost Diana, but the world keep spinning.

And BTW, comparing Diana to 9/11 (or anything else)? If ranking tragedies is according to how subjectively tragic they were is your only hobby then... that's just tragic... get out more.

And to those of you asking about SSBB, the UK release date is early Summer, I think Australia might be the same but I'm not sure. It'll be a while.

 

[Psykoo]

I dont know if anyone has already commented this or noticed, but has anyone got any idea why this review has less comments besides the fact (the only thing i can think of) that it is a racing game and might be considered 'less enjoyable'. I havnt actually counted...becuse who would, but this review seems too have one of the highest quantity of jokes on its shelf, which are as funny as ever! yet it has less comments than previous reviews and newer reviews, can someone shed some light on the confusion i have please :S , the review is great as always, i would say "GO YAHTZEE!" but i dont want him too think hes some sort of god creature in the gaming world XD, so, well done on another successful review .

 

[Psyco Slim]

i pesonaly think that Revenge was better than Paradise because of the whole "hey, why dont u read this tiny map while drifting at 13709183123652546547478 mph" thing

 

[Pie21]

WOO DAVE MATTHEWS BAND! 154 comments and no one mentioning how awesome DMB are and how unbelieveable it is that someone else in Australia has so much as heard of them? Yahtzee just gained +41 <3 points in my book.

 

[Zephirius]

Is it just me or does the whole post-apocalyptic murderous car thing sound like an awesome concept?

 

[Chieffw]

To be honest, if every time Burnout: Paradise was replaced with Motorstorm, you would have a really sensible review. 100% of it applies fully to the gameplay of Motorstorm

 

[Diegolomac]

Is it just me or does the whole post-apocalyptic murderous car thing sound like an awesome concept?

I also thought it was very good. Maybe that really is the idea of the game, after all. Who knows?

 

[Cmo21]

Ohh Yahtzee you clever bastard
using "Crash Into Me" as an opener...

 

[Wingmna]

Bit where he says "just like any other theory" is where I thought he'd make a pun on evolution, guess he's just biased though... ><