Zero Punctuation: Dragon Age II

[Casimir_Effect]

personally I kind of liked how you didnt have some huge world ending plot and it was more about your life.... altho they certainly could have done a better job at that and the endless baddies did get old, I mean you would think at least the dogs would have some self preservation instinct

This. I haven't played the game and have tried to see very little about it, but upon hearing the plot wouldn't be the typical End of the World bullshit I was very happy.

I prefer it when the plot is more self-involved and revolves around a character instead of an event. Explains why my two favourite RPG stories are Planescape: Torment and Mask of the Betrayer. If only more games did this instead of always opting for an apocalypse.

 

[Nomanslander]

Fuck subtitles.

If all sequels went that route you can bet you'd see a bunch of games coming out in a year with the subtitle "Revelation" or "Resurrection" or "Requiem." Pretty much whatever Bible word that starts with an R that the developers thought sounded cool and epic.

Then there's also some subtitles that are just made up on the spot. Once again some idiot developer thinking it's cool to combine words like "Pandora Tomorrow" or "Daikatana" even though they made absolutely no sense.

Finally, you have the generic Pulp titles that likes to play mad libs with words, the so and so called Rise of [blank], Fall of [blank], Attack of the [blank], Revenge of the [blank], [blank] of the [blank].

To hell with all of them I say. I'm with The Angry Video Game Nerd on this one. All people want to know is what came first, middle, and last. Numbers are perfect for this, and if you want them to look fancy use Roman numerals.

 

[Darks63]

So its the matrix reloaded of the series then?

 

[Apollo45]

I was honestly expecting a bigger rant on the dungeon recycling.

I didn't. Yahtzee tries to mention things that other people don't. Critical Miss and everyone else is ranting about the recycling to the point where I'm almost ready to rip my ears off and tell people to get some originality in their life.

Ironic, considering how unoriginal the dungeons were...

On topic, excellent review. Pretty much what my thoughts on it were, although I am also surprised that he didn't mention the recycling areas more... That's honestly what pushed the game over in to 'unplayable' for me.

Edit: I'm also surprised he didn't mention how shallow all the characters felt... But, that might just be my opinion. I haven't fully decided on that one yet, although I can definitely back up my claim. *shrug*

 

[scw55]

I went with "Sparrow" (yay rubbish humour).

I did annoy me despite the many flaws Dragon Age 2 had, I did actually enjoy it and felt fully submerged.
Shame I can't bring myself to play it a second time. I got as far as landing in Kirkwall and felt "cba".

On the plus side, the city was pwretty and the music was great. The writing was awsome. Just everything was a bit meh.

I did like the story. But perhaps it didn't fit in an RPG setting. It was too political and too much auto-biographic.

I too also boned the gay mage.


An explanation for the out of place odd narrative; is Dragon Age 2 establishing a story for the other main character in the third where the Champion of Kirkwall and the Grey Warden Commander hold hands as they hop and skip through the flower meadows of corpses because Thedas has gone to shit?

 

[RatheMcGrath]

I gotta disagree with Yahtzee here, but I've done that before, so no biggie. While undeniably a second game (with another to follow) I thought that Dragon Age 2's approach (a rags to riches story) was an interesting place to take the genre.

Not a very funny review, either. Other than his first Mass Effect review, I often get the impression that Yahtzee doesn't know what to do with Bioware games, They just don't inspire him to his best stuff, whether he likes or dislikes the game.

 

[Tryforlive]

i thought this was funny but i still like DA 2

 

[Iskaminien]

I agree with you, Yahtzee.
I mean, I haven't played the game, but I'll take your word for it, so maybe that will piss off some fans.

 

[MrSnugglesworth]

I was gay with Anders too!


I HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON WITH YAHTZEE! WOOOOOOO!!!

 

[hecticpicnic]

There a hum in the background that turns on and off...fix that shit!

 

[draconiansundae]

i thought this was funny but i still like DA 2

Me too. Yahtzee hates on games I love all the time, but his criticisms still make me laugh. Especially the part about Leandra's tits. They look like a play-boy bunny's.

 

[Brotherofwill]

Glad I didn't buy the game. They'll need to do a lot better to make me buy the series again.

I went with "Mike Hawke" for my characters name. That never got old for me. I did it with rouge chick.

Hahaha, not bad.

 

[Lykosia_v1legacy]

I actually find it funny that some people really take Yathzee's reviews so seriously that they would decide what games to buy on his opinions. They have sometimes some comedic value, but that's it.

Oh.. and I remember how Yatzhee complained on DAO about having cliched fantasy story and setting. Now he complains that DA2 doesn't have cliched fantasy story and setting. I personally enjoyed the story because it was different and even felt unique for the genre.

 

[Andothul]

My biggest regrett about DA2 is that I bought it for a SHITLOAD of money!

And halfway through the game I felt a sudden urge to play DA1... The real dragon age!

I've heard mixed things too, so a quick question:

Whose opinion is more on the money, camp "storyless loading-fest" or "epic introduction to something even greater than LotR"?

Somewhere in between. I'm playing it on PC, so I can't speak on the loading times (which have been great for me), but "storyless" is completely off base. The story drives every mission in the game, but you're basically playing through episodes of this guy's life, not a quest to kill a big, bad demon. It's really about seeing how companion stories play out and choosing how to shape your character within all the different events.

As a result, it loses some of the "epic" quality, but it's still a fun game and a welcome chance to experience more of the Dragon Age lore. The conflict between mages and the chantry is really at the forefront here.

What lore? DA2 has you in Kirkwall the entire freaking game. Exploration and DA2 in the same sentence is an oxymoron.

I've been replaying my mage and the second playthrough i've noticed just how very lazy the dev team was with lore and the world.

Darkspawn emissaries have the same model as arcane horrors, all the darkspawn are hurlocks and they all look like the same power rangers villian.
Like seriously they couldn't even add in some genlocks or shriekers?.

 

[Clonekiller]

Finally! A game critic that agrees with me! It's hard to believe how many people ignore the dungeon recycling thing. Story kinda seemed like the second Pirates of the Caribbean movie: loosely strung together plot that's purpose is to get people interested in the next game. One really expensive game hook. I'd rather have a prologue cinematic. Plus, if I want a game similar to my life, I'll play freaking Sims 3.

 

[sir.rutthed]

Everything he said here was true, but it was also what I liked about the game. I prefer a story that's just about some Refugee guy who's life is fucked up and gets a few lucky breaks and then makes a name for himself. Why does it have to be more? Why must the fate of EVERYTHING EVER constantly rest on THE ONE LAST HOPE OF EVERYTHING EVER? Okay, so if every story was about some random guy trying to make it in the world we'd get bored, but I thought DAII was a nice refreshing perspective. There was no good or evil, just several displaced political groups and a desperate need for some coin.

Agreed. I'm tired of all this "Chosen One" storytelling bullshit. DA:O did that quite well, and I"m actually glad they took the story telling in a new direction for the sequel.

OT: Judging my his usual level of vitriol, seems this game isn't quite as bad as so many people are saying. He hit a lot of nails on the head though, good stuff Yahtzee.

 

[OliverTwist72]

Another group of enemies spawned behind my mages while I was fighting? I'M SO SURPRISED!!! Oh wait that happens every fight.

I romanced the pirate hag (her words not mine) cause I remember her from the first game...yup that's my only reason.

I did get a bit peeved that I would start an EPIC NEW QUEST! And be in the same room I was before, it was like hey did they have someone in here to clean out all the bodies while I was gone?


Edit: If you were having trouble coming up with another name instead of Dragon Age 2, they could've closed Dragon Age: Origins with a line from Flemeth:

"Hopefully we'll all meet again in Dragon Age 2: The Search for More Money!"

 

[Lissa-QUON]

Rather glad to see someone else note the camera issues.

That camera is part of the reason I even gave up playing in the middle of the demo. I got sick of fighting it to see what the hell was attacking me.

So theres no real conflict? Odd, from what I saw in the demo of Whatsherface looking for The Champion or whatever I would have assumed there would be some recruiting to go do something or rather.

 

[rsvp42]

Somewhere in between. I'm playing it on PC, so I can't speak on the loading times (which have been great for me), but "storyless" is completely off base. The story drives every mission in the game, but you're basically playing through episodes of this guy's life.

I would like to know which game you played, because the plot is nearly nonexistent. Half of the time you will find yourself wandering around, doing quests for no reason other than they are the closest thing to you. It really plays out like a MMO in this way, where the story is an after thought to the grinding out quests.

I chose not to read your spoilers because I haven't finished the game (RL responsibilities limit my play time). While I agree that many of the optional or secondary quests were inconsequential, they still had story and usually related in some way to the events. If the plot suffers, it's only because it lacks a clear driving goal that connects everything. I don't feel like there are any more random optional quests here than there were in the Mass Effect games, but those had the benefit of an overarching goal that connected all the main story quests. I'm not saying that going for the more episodic, slice-of-life approach was the best choice, but it's enjoyable for what it is.

Whether you appreciate its approach or not, the game is at least fun with an enjoyable cast of characters. And my playthrough at least has had plenty of hefty story moments that affected me a lot more than I expected. But of course, I didn't come into the game with flawed expectations or presuppositions about how it would play, so I'm enjoying it and I'm interested in how everything turns out. I don't expect everyone to have the same experience, but I figure my favorable impressions are at least as valuable as some negative ones. I have one friend in particular that couldn't stand the first one, but is having a blast with DA2. To each, their own.

 

[Xaositect]

Yeah, pretty much sums it up really.

Both ME2 and DA2 feel like Bioware just wasting everyones time by constantly throwing hordes of crappy, stupid, monotonous enemies at the player after trapping them in their new shitty, linear environments all the while shouting their excuse of "WE IMPROOVED TEH COMBAHT!" Which happens to be debatable.