Zero Punctuation: Everybody's Gone To The Rapture

[thanatos388]

Jesus Christ, nothing's coming out anymore. At this rate, Yahtzee won't be able to make a Top 5 video.

Wonder if he'd be able to do a retro Top 5 of 2007...

Until Dawn came out a couple of days ago, and we have Phantom Pain, AC Syndicate, Fallout 4, the annual COD misery train...

I doubt Yahtzee will review MGS5 Part 2 unless as a last resort. After that, that's only 5 games total, and COD won't be coming till November.

You say "Part 2" as if the content in "Part 1" was enough to be considered part 1 and not simply a short bullshit prologue with some silly mods on top. On that note Yahtzee loves to shit on Kojimas writing too much to pass up the final Metal Gear I think. Also its gameplay is so different that it probably warrants a review from him just to see if the larger focus on gameplay was enough to entertain him.

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

He likes some of them, but IIRC, he doesn't like any of the "new" FF games, pretty much any of them after IX(has he ever said anything about X?).

I'm not 100% sure but I think he criticized X's [ridiculously convoluted] story in one of his recent Let's Drown Out videos. I forget which. Also made a similar observation regarding the Kingdom Hearts chronology, in comparison.

 

[GrumbleGrump]

I'd like to see Yahtzee review Splinter Cell Blacklist or Mortal Kombat 9(and his thoughts on it getting banned and then unbanned in Australia).

He already did Mortal Kombat 9, dude.

He also sorta liked Arkham Knight.

Eh, he liked the gameplay, which is really the only thing to like about the game apart from the graphics. Besides, it's not really top 5 material as the story was terrible. Whats worse, it's the kind of terrible that isn't even funny.

You say "Part 2" as if the content in "Part 1" was enough to be considered part 1 and not simply a short bullshit prologue with some silly mods on top. On that note Yahtzee loves to shit on Kojimas writing too much to pass up the final Metal Gear I think. Also its gameplay is so different that it probably warrants a review from him just to see if the larger focus on gameplay was enough to entertain him.

He did admit to liking the gameplay, so far to say that if it was on a game longer that what he got for 40 smackaroos, he would love it. It's hard to debate him on that too, I played Ground Zeroes (bought it for like 5 bucks) and it's pretty good. Flows quite well actually.

 

[Blood Brain Barrier]

So, another typical Chinese Room "game" - an audiobook, where you hold the W-key for an hour to listen to it with a lot of pause.
I feel those guys should just do that, audiobooks, as they clearly don't have the slightest grasp of what a game is supposed to be. You know, interactive in SOME way.

You're right, they should have allowed you to punch and shoot things at random intervals. Because that's basically what 'interactivity' entails these days.

 

[Bindal]

So, another typical Chinese Room "game" - an audiobook, where you hold the W-key for an hour to listen to it with a lot of pause.
I feel those guys should just do that, audiobooks, as they clearly don't have the slightest grasp of what a game is supposed to be. You know, interactive in SOME way.

You're right, they should have allowed you to punch and shoot things at random intervals. Because that's basically what 'interactivity' entails these days.

No, but say, having to press a button to lower a bridge. Or offering two routes, leading maybe or maybe not a different storypath. Stanley Parable did that as basically its sole "game mechanic". It had no proper failure state (you could get an ending you already knew about from the five billion or so the game had and consider that as failure state), but it was still interactive and it reacted to what you did - either by adapting the story or questioning you straigh up.
Here, we got "walk to listen to audiologs" and nothing else. The order doesn't make a difference, either. And Dear Esther was even worse as you were stuck on rails.

 

[madattak]

It would be interesting to see what Yahtzee thinks of 80 Days, a game that is primarily narrative but still stays a game, but alas it is only a mobile game and so I would presume not up for review.

 

[Ver Greeneyes]

Hey, what's with the dig at Ethan Carter? Among scenery-touring, gameplay-light software where you bump into audio bits, it had the most interaction of all of them combined and then some, and that puzzle with the house layout house very clever indeed. It even had a context for why it all happened, who you are and why you are there. AND you could run. Very fast, actually, with unlimited stamina.

I don't think that was necessarily a jab at Ethan Carter, though I could be wrong. I think he was just using it as an example of a walking simulator with some actual challenge to it. After all he also lumped Stanley Parable in with the rest of them, then went on to praise it later.

 

[GrumbleGrump]

I didn't think the story was "terrible" at all, I thought it was pretty damn good(though the Arkham Knight's identity was a tad predictable) and Yahtzee certainly didn't seem to hate the story.

It's terribly boring, it's has even more of that bullshit "batman is such a badass he doesnt afraid of anything" to the point that he beats the fear toxin out of sheer will. It also destroys any kind interest in Batman's character development, where every traumatic event he undergoes is completely moot (Batgirl's "Death", Jason Todd coming back) as it doesn't end up affecting Batman in the slightest. The story is a zero sum in every way.

 

[Steve the Pocket]

I'm not very interested in the premise of this game, but I'd put even less stock in Yahtzee's opinion of any story ever. It's not like he's liked any of the interesting narrative games of the past few years, or basically any JRPG ever, mind, so in terms of game narrative criticism he's slighting everything against an invisible rule stick.

Adding to the dogpile on this post by reminding you that he loved BioShock Infinite, and I'm sure it wasn't because of the innovative and engaging gameplay.