Zero Punctuation: Final Fantasy XIII

[SomeBritishDude]

Loved the bit about the stove. Nice analogy.

I've been hearing this game is not only bad as games go, but bad as Final Fantasy games go. Even look at the game from a great distance it's easy to see that turning a franchise known for great sprawling environments full of lots of weird arse monsters to grind and reducing it to a bunch of linear corridors is just madness.

 

[lollipopz]

Wow, Was I the only one to find this episode.....Alot worse than usual?

I mean if you've got a load of work to do with other stuff do that, take a week off from making this show or something.

Well what can I expect from free entertainment.

Totally agree with this. Its pretty common knowledge that FFXIII is a long game. Playing for five hours, calling it shit even when its meant to be 50 hours is kind of ridiculous really <<;

Massive ZP fan, but if you don't have the time... Stick with the stuff you do have the time for maybe?

 

[Carnagath]

Let's face it, noone actually expected him to play up to chapter 11, did they... Anyway, I hope that bar goes well enough for him to be able to relax a bit and get more into the games that he is reviewing, because the "valid point - to - comedy" ratio went from 50/50 to 10/90 in the last few weeks and that kinda sucks.

 

[Jaranja]

This game is bad and you should feel bad for liking it.

I'm sure it is to you. I love this game.

 

[Zombie Nixon]

Why are people saying that the game starts to be fun twenty hours in?

In twenty hours, you could play two games that are fun all the way through.

Why shouldn't a game be enjoyable from the beginning?

 

[dragonshardz]

Screw bias when JRPG's are involved. I always hated them and I always will. Hail Yahtzee!

 

[gamegod25]

Eh, I thought it was a pretty bad review. Even though you have the boredom threshold of 12 picoseconds, you could at least give it a bigger chance and give it some more substantial criticism. The nitpicking was more present than the actual criticism.

Still, it was pretty funny, I know you do this for comedy, so I will still get FFXIII, despite all horrible things said.

I think 5 hours is more than fair to give any game a chance. If it takes 5 to 20 hours for the story to kick in and the gameplay to get good, then that's not good game design. I know many gamers think that longer is better (especially for RPG's) but I'd rather play 2 hours that's good all the way through (ex portal) than 20+ hours of padding.

But like others have said, we don't watch Yahtzee to make buying decisions, we just enjoy watching a brit go crazy XD

 

[GameGoddess101]

Congrats on the Mana Bar. Glad its doing well.

But honestly, this review was something I expected... As I played, I saw exactly what Yahtzee would hate and I knew exactly what he was going to say about it...
Unbiased... I am SO sure... ¬.¬

Funny though...
With the erotic fanart though.... it's Final Fantasy... if there isn't one picture of the "kooky" girl getting her pumpkin tits out or being raped by tentacle monster du jour then it's not a Final Fantasy game, is it?

 

[JoshuaMadoc]

What Yahtzee has touched upon here is that he seems to (inadvertedly) realize that games need the quality to "last" the gamer long enough 'till the very bloody end. I think "customer satisfaction" might be one way to put it.

 

[sunpop]

I made a promise to myself I would not be playing this game, It hasn't been hard to keep as I got sick of final fantasy a while ago.

 

[Brad Shepard]

Did he say he loved FF6, yet shown a image of FF 3? or did i miss something? xD

Yes, you missed the notice that everyone who posts "XD" or it's variations are faggots.

well, someones grumpy arnt they?

So much heresy, so little time.

you know what, i saw your other post, im not even going to give a troll like you the time of day. reported and moving on.

 

[Ddgafd]

Did he say he loved FF6, yet shown a image of FF 3? or did i miss something? xD

Everywhere else than Japan(I think) FF6 was FF3 and FF4 was FF2. FF2, 3 and 5 didn't get released anywhere else.

OT: I knew this game sucked. FF games have always sucked after 9, with the exception of 8, because that game was awful. Good review, Yahtzee.

 

[Fappy]

Yeah I honestly didn't believe he would play FFXIII, much less 5 hours. Yahtzee is a trooper.

 

[twaddle]

I didn't see that coming. not the fact that he thought it was bad but the fact that he ever reviewedit at all. we had a discussion about this awhile back and we all thought he wasn't gonna review it.

 

[Orekoya]

Did he say he loved FF6, yet shown a image of FF 3? or did i miss something? xD

FF6 - was originally released as FF3 in the US for the SNES; the original 2, 3, & 5 were initially not released in the US. They were later released after initial releases were getting recycled.

 

[Elesar]

OKAY, SO. The chocobo in Sazh's afro. Can we all agree to start calling it "frocobo"? Yes?

No, it's the Chocofro.

 

[Sparrow]

He hated the game?

WHAT A TWIST!

SHOCK HORROR!

But no, seriously. As much as I usually pan Yahtzee for speaking crap, he shares much of the same opinion I do on the FF games: First few were good. Middle few were pants. Current few are bollocks.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Well, did you expect him to like it?

 

[Luis Felipe]

I approve this review!

 

[ALPHATT]

Nice. I guess hoping you might like THIS one was very silly of us.

very silly of you. Besides he's 100% right.