Zero Punctuation: God of War: Chains of Olympus
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
Those little analog psp knobs are removable. You'd know this if you've ever played a PSP on demo inside of a game shop because people fucking steal them.
Oh come on, DMC and God of war were so similar Jaffe had major problems even getting funding for the game. Everyone he talked to saw it as a derivitive DMC knock-off (of which there were already dozens) and didn't want to throw another bomb.
God of War is nothing more than macho-fantasy violence-porn; a game's whose popularity is based on the fact that it allows a bunch of whiny losers to feel powerful for once in their lives. Kratos is a psychopath who is rewarded with godhood for commiting mass-murder, only taking a break from slaughtering innocent lives in order to bang two chicks at once. How Xtreme!!!! When I first played it I thought it was so ridiculous I was sure it had to be a satire. Oh and also it manages to shit all over every greek myth. When did Pandora's box make mortals into power rangers? Make my Kratos GROOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW!!!
God of War is nothing more than macho-fantasy violence-porn; a game's whose popularity is based on the fact that it allows a bunch of whiny losers to feel powerful for once in their lives. Kratos is a psychopath who is rewarded with godhood for commiting mass-murder, only taking a break from slaughtering innocent lives in order to bang two chicks at once. How Xtreme!!!! When I first played it I thought it was so ridiculous I was sure it had to be a satire. Oh and also it manages to shit all over every greek myth. When did Pandora's box make mortals into power rangers? Make my Kratos GROOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW!!!
haha, another great review. the thing i agreed most with was it being a "stress reliever". you don't have to be a "whiny loser" or "weak" to enjoy slicing everything with a pulse with two swords. the first time i played GoW1, i played it for 4 hours straight and felt very relaxed afterward. the fact that you have to use your brain when fighting is rewarding.
no sex scene reference, but the "girlfriend" comment was funny. it might be the fact that your honest and funny at the same time, plus the accent and pleasing looks. personally, i'd just like to meet you. it'd be a nice break from the annoying retards at my school who can't hold a decent intellectual conversation to save their lives.
no sex scene reference, but the "girlfriend" comment was funny. it might be the fact that your honest and funny at the same time, plus the accent and pleasing looks. personally, i'd just like to meet you. it'd be a nice break from the annoying retards at my school who can't hold a decent intellectual conversation to save their lives.
I'm glad that a few other people were willing to share their thoughts on "respite" with me. Was interesting to see that saying it as "re-spit" and "re-spite" are both valid. Also nice to know that I can ask a genuine question to "The Internet" and get some decent (non bitchy) replies.
Cheers
Cheers
Has anyone but me (apart from the now obvious post above me) realised that Yahtzee is pictured (I guess) playing the PSP in front of a television like a controller?
I got a PSP, and I totally agree with Yahtzee about the fact that your finger keeps sliding off the damned analogue button. It was a real pain in the ass, until I found that you can get these $5 replacement sticks at Gamestop. There are 3 to a pack, they are bigger, actually made of rubber so your thumb doesn't slide off, and makes playing EVERY game much easier, and much more fun.
Of course, if you are unfortunate enough to have bought the newer slim PSP, you're SOL, as the stick it comes with cannot be removed and replaced like on the old fat one.
Of course, if you are unfortunate enough to have bought the newer slim PSP, you're SOL, as the stick it comes with cannot be removed and replaced like on the old fat one.
When half-assing it like that, anything can sound bad, DMC included: DMC, when speaking in the same analytically diminishing terms as you're speaking in, is nothing more than a paint-by-numbers hack-and-slash who's fame comes from the fact that it pioneered a sub-genre from which only two or three games series are worth noting everything else being a one-shot game or utter shit. Dante is a cocky punk (who makes an even worse "cool and calm badass" as shown by DMC2) who's flair as a character comes from nothing more than his abilitiy to seamlessly slay demons while making a trash-talking a-hole out of himself, only stopping with the fighting to further focus on his narcissistic taunting. Not to mention how it takes beings and such from multiple mythologies (Greek included) and desecrates them into a modern-day goth goth run. Since when was the ruler of hell a three-eyed blob stuck in a statue? Since when was Echidna a Poison Ivy wannabe? Since when was Lucifer a back-pack that shot out red blades?Grampy_bone said:
Making good things sound shitty is never fun though.
Let's face it-this is a stress release game for people (such as myself) who have to assuage the homicidal rage they feel towards the retarded twats they're surrounded by in a manner that does not involve a jail sentence and the inevitable ass rape-age that follows.
now i am just as guilty as the above poster but i feel that after a year and a bit he deserves to be told what necroing is, the act of necroing is posting in a thread that has been dead or inactive for an extended period of time.crampy said:
THE MORE YOU KNOW!!!!!
