Zero Punctuation: Halo Wars

nought_0

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Sep 17, 2008
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I love RTS games, but one of the best decsriptions of them I ever heard was: "You command by drawing a box with the left mouse button, then conquer by clicking the right mouse button."
Mind you, most FPS games boil down to "get the target in the centre of the screen and hold down a button until it dies"

On the RTS front, I'd say Play Company Of Heroes & Supreme Commander. If neither of those take your fancy, you probably just plain don't like RTS games.


AND NO MORE CROSSOVERS.
 

Enosh_

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Aug 27, 2008
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oh and just btw:
marines in halo aren't using power armor afaik, it's just normal armor, only the spartans use powered armor
 
Mar 31, 2009
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Without a doubt, and my main strategy was to bum rape everything on teh screen with chimeras and dragons. Forgive with obvious harry potter references and it is very fun. I doubt yatzee would play it though because he hates JRPG's of any kind and some characters have unfeasible boobage, or am I thinking about Odin sphere. back to point, Dragon+faeries=bum rape
 

ikari_matt

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Aug 19, 2008
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ajaja xD the face of yug on that troll was so fucking funny xD hahahaha also the trolls at the end taking over the show x3
 

GyroCaptain

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Jan 7, 2008
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Eternal Vigil said:
Geo Da Sponge said:
Eternal Vigil said:
2. The whole point of that mission was to recover troops and return to your ship before it got sucked into a massive portal and they be trapped on the surface of the planet and chewed on by the alien hordes, hence the time limit. The 'We've lost contact' was about the ship, not your units.
Quoted for truth. I didn't particularly want to type the exact same thing that someone else has undoubtly said before, but I would like to bring this up again so that anyone else missing the point can understand.

EDIT: Wait, if Yahtzee didn't make it to the end of the game, he can't have seen the last few cinematics! No wonder he doesn't like them!

Overall, I would say what I always say about Halo Wars. You may not enjoy it, you may think it's a cash in, but it has had effort put in. Some games, eg. Lord of the Rings: Conquest look like they were squirted out in an afternoon. Games like that don't get nice prerendered cutscenes and (mostly) inventive missions.
Thanks for quoting me.

If he didn't finish it, he can't really give a fair view on it, my like I think his overall opinion on the entire franchise is a little biased as he's only played Halo 3, and that's one of the weakest in the series.

I agree. Ensemble really did put some effort in this game and making it more accessible to RTS newbies, and I think it's control scheme is better than the other console RTS' which are all ports.

I not going to deny the game have problems, as it does and it know where near the best RTS game ever made, but for what it is, and who's its aimed at, I don't think it came out that badly.
I read this thread as far as 8 pages, and between the frankly unreasonable prejudice against the Halo franchise and unwillingness to adapt to games trying new things or pay attention I don't think anyone should take this as holy writ that Halo Wars sucks. 80%+ of the posts here are "Halo (Wars) sucks because it's Halo!", "PC RTS ONLY, RAWR", and "LOL YAHTZEE". Seriously, some of these people should just try the GD demo and see for themselves. I think he really missed the point about vehicles; the upgrades to turret turning speed and other abilities highlight the place of infantry and the fact that you're supposed to experience traffic jams with heavy vehicle rushes.

This isn't to say the review wasn't funny (particularly the Pedigree Chum imps), but going into it with "this is a game for retards" as a preconception wasn't a good idea.
 

Typhron

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Dec 17, 2008
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Oh man. That caught me off guard a little.

Edit x2: LOL DISREGARD HAIRSPLITTING STATEMENT I SUCK
 

PeterDawson

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Feb 10, 2009
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I had no idea X-Blade(s) was even out. Of course, watching an Americanized Japanese heroine going through a lot less interesting romp than her spiritual ancestor from Heavenly Sword has a large lack of appeal, much like Too Human and its Devil May Die syndrome.

As for Halo Wars, that clock thing was absolute BS. If the units are within a safety zone and there's no threats, the game can detect that. It just screams lazy level design. Hell, a lot of Halo Wars feels a bit lazy, but as he pointed out it is supposed to appeal to Halo fans thus you can't make a complex RTS based on an FPS without making it more accessable to the action gamers that are FPS players.
 

providen

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May 27, 2008
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sacrilege! this only proves how much talent is needed to being a really good professional smugjerk, which is what I love about zeropunctuation and I wouldn't have it any other way.

on a sidenote, X-blades comes from Russia, and was originally called Onibleyd, published in 2007
 

S_K

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Nov 16, 2007
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Yay for dissing the RTS genre, the only thing you missed is that oh so WONDERFUL situtation where you spend all your time grinding and defending to try and get stronger, while your stronger opponent spends that time beating the crap out of you like an endless cycle which normally ends with you dying no matter what you try. The only way to stop something like that is to somehow bottle neck their attack, but that sounds too much like I actually care about those kind of games =P
 

Zedzero

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Feb 19, 2009
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Another great episode, funny intro.

Does this mean Ben's endorsing Unskippable?
 

kenji8055

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May 28, 2008
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I guess this was an attempt to help UnSkippable try and gain some of ZP's fanbase. An interesting idea that should work in theory but I think they underestimate just how many people will see it for what it is instead of just moaning that someone is stealing time from their weekly fix of yellow backgrounds.

Personally I found it quite good, watch unskipable anyway so I guess it wasn't aimed at me anyway :p
 

amara2021

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Mar 29, 2009
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Both of their reviews were hilarious especialy the part about Yatzee running out of time on halo wars and the girl from x sword's imaginary thog strings. As an RTS fan I guess its my time to burst from under my rock and belch out The Battle for Middle Earth 2!
 

Arkhangelsk

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Mar 1, 2009
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amara2021 said:
Both of their reviews were hilarious especialy the part about Yatzee running out of time on halo wars and the girl from x sword's imaginary thog strings. As an RTS fan I guess its my time to burst from under my rock and belch out The Battle for Middle Earth 2!
Since you're an RTS fan, maybe you can give me some tips on a good RTS except Middle Earth, cause 1. I don't like Lord of The Rings (don't try to find me and assassinate me with your Legolas bow and your Frodo dagger cause I don't belong to the fan base, cause I still stand corrected, the book was too long, and the movies were horrible)and 2. I played The Battle for Middle Earth (no! I'm still not a fan or a hypocrite, I was 8, and that's the age where you don't have a free will, you just do whatever gets you friends...anyway, where was I? oh right) and when I played it the second time about a year ago, it's horrible quality scared me away so much I had to hide behind Starcraft so it couldn't hurt my brain anymore. Anyway...what was the question? Oh, right, any good RTS you know? (except Middle Earth 2) And I'm getting Starcraft 2, just so you know.
 

Primedeath

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Jul 11, 2008
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Hmm I'll admit that level with the timer was a bit challenging, and i had to play it on the easiest difficulty. All you need to do is pull a massive Scorpion tank rush and then use them to guard the Flood spawns from regenerating, then retrieve and pull your units in from across the map.
Actually, you can easily accomplish this by just building Vultures.. They are available on that map for a good damn reason.. I used only THREE vehicles to complete that map.


Just create three Vultures and upgrade to Mega-Barrage... What you do is do a hit and run tactic on the things that spit at your planes.. You select it to Barrage one, then once it lets the missiles loose you get out of range of the others. You use each Vulture independently on each thing that attacks you. They gain veterancy damn easy as well, at the end all three had two or three stars. For the flying units, you use Cryobomb and Barrage those as well..

L2Play this easy RTS.

Edit: I did this on Legendary easily.. It was so much easier than on Easy.. I mean it, once you learned how to play.