Zero Punctuation: Halo Wars

[kavinsky]

I think that if Graham had gotten a better mic and done star ocean istead of x blades it would have been better. But im glad to see that Yahtzee and the unskipable guys are getting out of there comfort zones and trying new things that thye hate, yahtzee should do either driv3r (he hasn't done a drivng game in awhile) or barbie horse adventures next and paul should do zp next week.

 

[Dectilon]

Hei I lkei stracfratf! u shuld reviu it lol!

Seriously, isn't Halo Wars basically My First RTS?

 

[Crash486]

Why review DOW2 instead of halo wars? They're practically the same game.

not realy no

if there is anything he should review it's Company of Heroes^^

DOW2 was a ridiculously oversimplified RTS which was a real letdown to anyone who was a fan of the original Dawn of War and it's various expansions. All the reviewers claim this simplification of RTS gameplay showed true innovation, but all I see is yet another game genre falling to the plague of casualgame-itis.

 

[Incredible Bullshitting Man]

OK, now this collaboration thingy has (un)officially become...WIN! Yahtzee was as hilariously angry as always and Graham managed to pull off a good joke on him. Very nice indeed.

 

[NOOBSAUCE]

Loved the part about why yahtzee doesn't play rts, plus the guest appearance was hilarious

 

[Joreal]

Nice. Good to see collaboration between friends, especially when it results in hilarity like that. Graham was awesome. Glad to see it wasn't straight Graham, or rather just him, because nobody can really rage like Yahtzee. I needs me my cup of Croshaw Rage on Wednesdays.

Also, isn't it time that either A) Yahtzee put up the forum topic for each week's ZP ~5-10 minutes after the episode goes live, or B) puts the thread up and then lock the sucker for ~5-10 minutes? I think that'd put an end to most "ZOOMJ FERST DERP" posts, or if not at least make them look even stupider. Granted, they'd be refreshing like crazy and all that... but then you could put a buffer that locks them out of the forums for 30 minutes due to 3-5 refreshes within the last 30-45 seconds.

At least I'm thinking. :|

 

[Kstreitenfeld]

unskippable guy wasn't TOO bad, it just sounded like he was trying to be like yahtzee. halo wars part was pretty good. i don't blame his for hating strategy games. the only one i ever liked was fire emblem.

??? Fire emblem is not an RTS (Real Time), it's a Turn based strategy game. Not saying its bad, its just not an RTS.

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

So that's what they sound like...
My mind is completely blown.

 

[Aqua Trenoble]

It's nice to see the people at the escapist trying to mix things up a little, as much as it seems Yahtzee would prefer not to. This experimental stuff is pretty good though, and it appears that Yahtzee is finally developing emphasis and emotion.

 

[Escapefromwhatever]

This is the funniest Zero Punctuation yet! Don't give up Graham and Imps, all you need to do is, well, come back to life.

 

[Nico4]

One of the best

 

[Logicality]

I totally agree with Yahtzee on those timed missions. I understand that games need to be challenging, but some of those challenges make little to no sense at all.

The first portion was kinda funny. I loved the collaboration on Unskippable.

 

[MagusUnion]

The fact that he wouldn't even restart that mission is kinda horrible on his end. HAD he just replayed the damn level, then he would have found out that the ship he was commanding on was FUCKING 3 MILES IN A PLANET at that point. Yeah, you CAN lose contact to a command group eyebrows away when you HAVE NO BASE SHIP TO CONTACT ANYMORE!....

But on that note, Halo Wars is slightly broken. Tanks are overpowered, Infantry is slighty useless unless you are playing that ONE leader who can spam a bunch of those fuckers on the ground. And as far as X Box Live goes, it really just becomes a race for all the human factions to grab their "special unit" first and spam creating them as quickly as possible using "all-peeps-target-kill" button...

BTW Yahtzee, you could select all units of a particular type using the right trigger. So yes, you can send your stupid flying fucks into battle individually. But then again, there's really no point to in most cases...

It's a review that might have made more sense if he had finished the rest of the game, and maybe I'm a bit dissapointed in that. I completed the mission with more than enough time to bone the girl next door, but then again RTS's aren't that unfamiliar to me, probably less so than the female anatomy....

But in conclution to the rant. YES: Halo Wars does suck on the level of dim witted unbalanced unit shit that it has. YES: It's okay to hate it (and yet like it if you are dumb enough to buy the LCE version of it *coughcough*). No: Just because you failed one damn mission for a stupid reason doesn't mean the whole game sucks overall (see: Homeworld 1 and/or 2). and No: Just because you had one bad encounter with an RTS doesn't mean they all reflect the same about of stupidity as a whole....

Only those on a console do, and that may be why only stupid fan boy fucks play the damn game...

 

[whaleswiththumbs]

Did anyone besides me here ACTUALLY watch it, or just LOLRUN here to attempt a ZOMG I R FURST, I M SHPESHAL!!!...?

I watched 3 times, and showed my friends, where it starts with the tanks steamrolling, bull f***ing s*** funny funny funny

 

[Tech Team FTW!]

Wow the guy reviewing X-blades has such an annoying voice. Although I did love Yahtzee's bashing of halo fanboys.

you seem to have not noticed all the youtube zero punctuation copycats who all have massively annoying voices.

 

[ideitbawx]

haven't laughed this hard at a zero punctuation ever! the start was awesome, yahtzee was awesome, the imps were awesome, it was just awesome

 

[Quelthazar]

... *facepalm* as i wrote at the Unskippable, the glorifycation is making me sick... Enough of that.
This was a nice ZP. The Z-Blades part was nice but as always the original ZP part was better. Awesome ZP for April 1.

 

[almaster88]

I realize everyone wants to be a noob and complain about it in someway, so just to be different, they should have more guest appearences, I thought it was pretty funny.
Little bit hard to catch everything he was saying, but I guess you need a brilliant accent to pull it off completely.

I'll expect my complementary T-shirt someday soon ^_^

 

[Enosh_]

DOW2 was a ridiculously oversimplified RTS which was a real letdown to anyone who was a fan of the original Dawn of War and it's various expansions.

that still doens't make it anything like halo wars from a gameplay perspective, which was your original comment.

and the original DoW is nothing compared to CoH or DoW2, hell I didn't touch it since I got CoH. CoH yes it is atm better than DoW2, but CoH has 2 years of polishing, dow2 is out for something over a month. But already at this stage it is way ahead of DoW1 (imo ofcourse, I realise there are people that expected DoW1.5 and are now bitter beacose DoW2 is something difrent than just a graphic update)

 

[Nazulu]

That was brilliant, haven't laughed so hard since I started watching your reviews from the beginning! For a second I thought someone replaced you this time because you were of in wonderland or whatever. Not saying he wasn't funny because he was!

Well, I am surprised you ended up doing a RTS title but it all ended up pretty well, I learnt from you that there is piss all startegy since you could just clobber them with tanks and that the movement is shit! Tiberium Wars had the worst vehicle movement, having to make them go in reverse whenever they got stuck on EVERYTHING!

What a shame, another RTS down the drain! I swear, Starcraft 2 and Dawn of War better make up for this!