Zero Punctuation: Kid Icarus: Uprising

[ACman]

I don't have this problem in all but 3 levels.

So you did have this problem for three levels then?

nothing more than trivial ***** fitting and/or bullcrap, Yahtzee.

Whooo. Projecting much?

 

[Spenstar]

I didn't have that problem at all, I really don't get why it would be an issue to someone, actually...

 

[MaxwellEdison]

Surprised he didn't complain about the alien invasion. Seriously, who nitpicks deviations from Greek mythology when a game decides to have an alien invasion in the middle of their interpretation of Greek mythology?

I'm just gonna assume that everything he didn't bring up in the review is good, because that leaves about 95% of the game. He didn't touch on the story outside of the outline you get in mission fucking one. He didn't remark on the bosses at all. He didn't say anything about weapon variety or enemy design or level design or fucking ANYTHING about the game design outside of shitting on the controls, which he also didn't mention are highly customizable to the point where you can remove the stylus completely. And what, exactly, annoyed him about the dialogue again? I think he called it "self-referencing" but I'm not sure what he means by that. Referencing the one game they had 25 years ago? They stop that after mission 10. Hell, the first 10 missions are basically a remake of that game anyway, and they're never annoying about it. Most of my favourite jokes in the game are when the gods make fun of Pit, which is all the time and all of them do it.

I'm wondering where he gets the retro feeling from. This is the most baffling comment he made, really. After Skyward Sword and Mario 3D Land this game feels a full decade ahead of the rest of Nintendo's offerings. It's easily the most contemporary feeling game Nintendo's made since the GC was in it's prime. This feels like a game from 2012. But I guess because it showed an 8-bit sprite at one point and uses chiptune music for some enemies it's a "retro" game.

I usually don't get into arguments over games I haven't played, but he did actually mention the bosses and the level design.

 

[Trishbot]

Kid Icarus: Uprising is currently my favorite game of the year.

The controls take awhile to get into, but once you get past the learning curve and you get into the groove, they work just fine. I only wish they supported the CPP more.

And it's crazy that if you'd ask me whether I was going to enjoy Kid Icarus or Mass Effect 3 more, I'd have laughed and told you it wasn't going to be a contest. And yet, nope, Kid Icarus is insanely addicting, insanely good, insanely charming, insanely fun, insanely deep, and insanely satisfying, while Mass Effect 3's finale was the complete opposite of "satisfying".

Of course, that's my personal opinion... but also not one that I would have believed myself if I had time-traveled back three months and told myself this.

 

[Miroku2235]

I'd love to watch this review/critique and toss in my two cents, but that stupid ad for that stupider show, Space Janitors, is causing it to bug or something and just give me a black box.

 

[NiPah]

Yeah cause its really good game design for people to have to change the control scheme because the default controls are shit

To complain about something that trivial shows how lazy, petty, ignorant and downright ungrateful today's gamers have become to me. Thanks for reminding me that, assclown.

Yes! We're so lazy and etitled for demanding that developers do their job and get game design right! God, we're soooo damn naggy and entitled! We should just give them our money and stop being so judgy about what they give us! God!

Yes! Yes you are! It took me barely a minute to adjust the controls to my liking, what's your fucking problem then?

And they are doing their job, what might be good controls to one person may be shit to someone else.

Seriously I'm fed up with twats like you that share Yahtzee's elitist mentality and I'm not going to be nice about it anymore since it's why we can't have nice things apparently. Come up with a more legit complaint or shut your fucking mouth.

Back in my day you had to be ab elitist prick to be called an elitist prick, now we have people using it more then Rush Limbaugh talking about liberal politicians...

While you may have no problem with the controls, or even fiddling with controls, other people may. This is why reviews are very personal things, and why certain things that irk a person may mean they just won't enjoy Nintendo games since they will do it again and again.

 

[major_chaos]

Yahtzee is not anti Nintendo, he just hates Kid Icarus, Zelda, Metroid Prime M and Brawl. Just coincidence! Of course not, doesn't matter what he says he's biased whether he believes it or not.

Except for the fact that he doesn't hate Metroid prime he hates Other M and IMO anyone who has any level of taste hated Other M. He also doesn't hate Zelda he hated skyward sword, from passing mentions he seems rather fond of Wind Waker. On top of that he spent the first minute or so of the review talking about how he liked the GameCube and the original DS, but no because he had the nerve to not like a game you enjoyed it is so very obvious that he is biased.

OT: most funny ZP in recent memory, but I already knew I wasn't going to be buying this game and it was only half because of the controls, the other big reason was that based on the clips in the Game Trailers review the voice acting is terrible and the "humor", if you can even call it that made me want to punch my screen.

Ok, he hates Nintendo as of now, Wii and 3DS.

It's not because he doesn't like Kid Icarus, it's because what he says is stupid, incomplete and even false! Yes, it's obvious he's biased, did you watch SSBB review?
It's other M, sorry for the mistake. And it's interesting he likes WindWaker because it's one of the worse Zelda's for home consoles.

yes I did, in fact I went back and watched it again to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything, and I didn't see anything terribly biased,yes he didn't like it but he didn't hate it anymore than most games, and I thought most of his complaints were accurate.

Ok, he hates Nintendo as of now, Wii and 3DS.

from where I'm standing he has every reason to: the 3DS is a mediocre hardware upgrade to the DS that brings exactly one new thing to the table and it is a terrible pointless gimmick that is not that visually impressive (IMO) and adds nothing to the game, and the Wii was built entirely around a gimmick that (again IMO) provides nothing a controller can't except massive amounts of frustration and also suffers from a minuscule library of worthwhile games, and I say all this as someone who is far from biased against Nintendo, I still have fond memories of the SNES and N64, and its not just nostalgia I still play my SNES and N64 on occasion, and Metroid (except Other M, fuck that POS) is one of my favorite franchises of all time. The point of this overlong rant is simply that I don't think Yahtzee hates Nintendo specifically, its just that Nintendo hasn't put out much good product since they realized that there was fat stacks of cash money to be had by being the first big name in the casual market which drew in a a large number of people with low standards and at the same time alienated people with very high standards, and the standards don't come much higher than Yahtzee.

Capcha: "broken record" great, even the anti-spam features are trying to tell me to shut up...

 

[Scars Unseen]

Medusa is really fappable now though.

"Oops... a little too erect... Anyone got a StF scroll?"

 

[A Gray Phantom]

Yahtzee liked Eternal Darkness? Really?! The game was gimmicky at best. Oh wait, what game did he review today?

 

[SAMAS]

About the only bare fact(ish thing) I have to disagree with is Yhatzee's idea that firing should have been handled by tapping on the stylus. It wouldn't have helped a damn thing, and arguably could've made it control worse.

There is a good way to fix the controls, and it's odd that they didn't think of it: If you gotta add a peripheral, it should've been the left-handed thumbstick. Considering they included compatability with it for left-handed play, it seems odd they didn't think to let you use it for aiming too.

 

[The_Echo]

Really, the controls for Uprising aren't that bad. I found them awkward at first, but was able to adapt fairly quickly. I've also never used the peripheral. It's 100% optional.

Other than that, same ol' Yahtzee hyperbolism.

 

[SAMAS]

Really, the controls for Uprising aren't that bad. I found them awkward at first, but was able to adapt fairly quickly. I've also never used the peripheral. It's 100% optional.

Other than that, same ol' Yahtzee hyperbolism.

I wouldn't say that. Read most reviews of this game, good or bad, and you usually find the same theme: People who scored it low usually did because of the controls, people who scored it high either had no problems with the controls, or were able to overlook them.

 

[CTYR]

I still don't understand what people are going on about when they whine about the controls, though.
Just from my experience, I can stand up straight whilst walking and I can play the game easily. Left thumb on the circley-thingy, left index finger on the trigger, right hand holding the stylus.
How come this is so difficult for everyone?

Have you played any chapter on the most intense mode? It's like really spraining your hand.

Yeah, I've completed several.
Why?

 

[Eventidal]

Pointless periperal...how about instead of making a stupid stand, just make the controls workable. Come on Nintendo, you're (sometimes) better than this.

Are the controls REALLY so bad, though? I played the entirety of Metroid Prime: Hunters and both Zelda games on DS without a stupid stand and my hands could go hours without a break. Both had the same "terrible" control scheme generally requiring you to hold the system with your left hand, press L and directional controls a lot, and manipulate the screen with the stylus. I never saw these complaints leveraged against any of those games.

 

[RJ Dalton]

It really blows my mind that game companies make such damn obvious mistakes with controls. It really does. How could anyone design such a set-up and then get through playtesting with it and nobody realizes its obvious problems?

 

[Enlong]

Maybe the playtesters didn't have problems with it. Hell, I'm 100 hours in, and only like 3 of them were with the stand. I mean, yeah, it's kinda nice to use, but I only use it if I'm already at a table. And if I remember it exists.

 

[T-Prime]

Does the Escapist not realize that I'm *less* likely to watch another one of their video series if the ad for that series causes the video I *want* to watch to not play? Space Janitors could be the greatest series of all time, but because I can't watch Yahtzee rip Kid Icarus I feel nothing but animosity towards all silly full-border ads from here to eternity.

 

[uguito-93]

I honestly did not mind all the in between mission micromanagement in this game and Valkyria Chronicles. I guess that seeing as how both games made the clear point that the player characters return to their base after every mission it kind of felt appropriate, you take a break from the action and choose your equipment before heading out. I guess what I'm trying to say is that it fit well with the story and it let you take a breather after every mission.

 

[uguito-93]

Pointless periperal...how about instead of making a stupid stand, just make the controls workable. Come on Nintendo, you're (sometimes) better than this.

Are the controls REALLY so bad, though? I played the entirety of Metroid Prime: Hunters and both Zelda games on DS without a stupid stand and my hands could go hours without a break. Both had the same "terrible" control scheme generally requiring you to hold the system with your left hand, press L and directional controls a lot, and manipulate the screen with the stylus. I never saw these complaints leveraged against any of those games.

I kinda feel the same, I found that after finding a comfortable way of holding the console (in my case with my left pinkie hooked under the DS and the right one over the right shoulder button) I could play the games for hours without pain. I'm guessing that hand size might factor into this though.

 

[Jailbird408]

This video is going into the TVTropes DMoS pages within the week.
I expected him to hate on Kid Icarus's controls for the entirety of the video. I did not expect him to compare it to Hunted: The Demon's Forge.
You didn't have to call it GOTY, but "a shit game for twats?" No, Yahtzee. Just no.