Zero Punctuation: Killzone 3

GeorgW

ALL GLORY TO ME!
Aug 27, 2010
4,806
0
0
Why so early, is it cuz of MM?
Nice vid, that control scheme seems moronic though.
 

elderrion

New member
Jun 25, 2010
6
0
0
what struck me as odd in this review was that yahtzee was pissed at America...wasn't killzone made in the Netherlands?
 

RA92

New member
Jan 1, 2011
3,079
0
0
So the Move is shit for aiming? No wonder devs haven't been supporting it.
 

Darkhill

New member
May 17, 2008
124
0
0
It was made by the Dutch? Now it's just downright bizzare. Still, it's obvious it was made for the American market, perhaps the Dutch wrote it as satire, which was promptly lost on the American actors/localizers?

Anyway, the baddies were just too likeable, I felt sad having to kill them :'(
 

SPARTANXIII

New member
Nov 24, 2009
458
0
0
The first minute of this is every British person's view of Killzone and America in general.

And I'm not even joking!
 

Ashcrexl

New member
May 27, 2009
1,416
0
0
i notice he didnt mention the much more fun multiplayer section of the game. i am surprised!
 

Carnagath

New member
Apr 18, 2009
1,814
0
0
Giggled like a 17 year old girl in a male strip club. It's lovely to see Yahtzee in such good shape just in time for some good old DA2 bashing. Eh? Ehhh?
 

mjc0961

YOU'RE a pie chart.
Nov 30, 2009
3,847
0
0
I don't mind R1 being used for firing in PS3 games because Sony put the worst "triggers" ever on the Dualshock 3. But I didn't have to worry about it anyway because I got used to the Move and now it's awesome. I've never had the red light reflected on the screen, at least not during gameplay. I also guess that's why they made all the menus and loading screens red.

Anyway, thanks for not hoping on board the troll bandwagon and saying that everyone is multiplayer is playing marksman infiltrator medic whatever class is up next on the troll of the day calendar like so many stupid forum goers do, while also complaining that the non-silenced M82 is overpowered which doesn't make sense because the only class that gets one is the infiltrator, which means they should never get shot by one because everyone is playing marksman infiltrator medic shut up already, trolls!
Yes, successful trolls are obviously successful seeing as I want to choke them all, and that means they win, but oh well. I'll just kill them online with my SMG as a tactician and then they can go whine about how everyone is a tactician with an OP SMG because that's what killed them last.

Huh? Oh right, review. Yeah, that bit at the start about Americans begging for help was a bit silly this time, because as has been stated many times, we didn't make this game. Oh well. We've done enough of them for the joke to still be funny. I also liked the little censor bar at the sausage slicer machine that read "Could be wurst".

Also I'm surprised there weren't any comments about the stupid stealth section, where you go and hide in a dark cave to wait to ambush some enemies, which would be normal except that the ISA all have stupid blue lights on their uniforms. So you have a giant "HERE I AM" lit sign on you. It would be fine if your attempt at stealth failed because of them, but then the Helghast will look right into that cave at you, with your big blue lights turned on full blast, and not see you. The fuck? That whole part made no sense.
 

TheMan2203

New member
Sep 14, 2010
63
0
0
I don't own a PS3 but i have played killzone 2 and i thought the controlliers were weird in that too, i spose its to make it stand out from certain other rivals that we wont mention here but it does make all the gunfights tie your thumbs and fingers in knots.
Also 100% agree that the cover system is truly pointless in these games.
 

dogenzakaminion

New member
Jun 15, 2010
669
0
0
I played this game co-op with a friend over the weekend. While I'm SOOOOO glad that proper splitscreen co-op has made a return, why does the screen split have to be so awkward? Tons of the screen are just black, wy couldnt they extend the lenght of the viewpoint to take up more screen real estate? Silly.

Also, the cockney thing is so true. 1. It never made me feel like the Helghan were evil...just made me feel like we were fighting in a post apocalyptic east London and 2. Why isn't the main character cockney? That would actually be cool! And having a charasmatic sounding lead whould be a nice change of pace.

I'm gla Yahtzee mentioned the stupidity of the ISA too. Is it just me, or are the troop carier flying box thingys the worst designed piece of military hardware in fiction. I mean, what is benefitial about it?? Explain game, EXPLAIN!
 

mjc0961

YOU'RE a pie chart.
Nov 30, 2009
3,847
0
0
The Real Sandman said:
HOORAY! Another tiresome brown n' gray cover based FPS with Nazis!
Killzone 3 is actually quite a bit colorful once you get out of the 2nd and 3rd levels. The first (just a tutorial) will show you some colors, then you go to brown and gray town for levels 2 and 3, then for level 4 you go to a jungle and colors come back.
 

cjackson92

New member
Mar 6, 2009
38
0
0
Pretty accurate tbh. I still liked KZ3 though, worth he money. They could have done a better job though, which is disappointing.
 

Seneschal

Blessed are the righteous
Jun 27, 2009
561
0
0
So, could anyone here please explain just how the Killzone controls differ from the norm? I've only ever watched gameplay videos on youtube. I've heard it handles differently, more sluggishly and with more realistic "weight". Could anyone elaborate on just what that means? It sounds interesting, but I can't quite imagine what it means for the gameplay.
 

Julian Daniel

New member
Jan 5, 2011
5
0
0
Yog Sothoth said:
Just as I've always thought: Killzone is nothing more than a poor man's Halo.
Halo is already horrible enough it can't get worse.

Mr. Yahtzee, I blame your dislike of Move Control on your ignorance/stupidity, as it works better than Dualshock AFTER you spend more than 10 Minutes with it.

I play online only with Move, and I'm still better than moster other players even in my first matches.
 

ProtoChimp

New member
Feb 8, 2010
2,236
0
0
Wow this game looks shockingly shit, also my mate said it's only like 4 hours long. I despised killzone 2 so I won't be borrowing my mate's PS3 for this... maybe Infamous 2.

The only worthwhile thing I got from this video that wasn't obvious (no offence to yahtzee, it was a good episode I've just always hated killzone) is that that advert for the film "Faster" looks shit... no wait that was obvious. Never mind then.