Zero Punctuation: Mafia II

[SturmDolch]

Nice for entertainment, but like most of the reviews for this game, not really a review.

Think of it like going into Zelda: Wind Waker and critiquing it on it's puzzle abilities because it had a sliding puzzle. It gets a 6/10 because the puzzle was simple and there was only one. Reservoir Dogs gets a 4/10 because it's a shitty action movie. Machete gets 5.5/10 because it didn't hold up as a romance film. Get my drift?

Same idea when you critique Mafia II based on its open world environment and limitations. It's a simulation game, not a sandbox game. It simulates the life of Vito, a gangster in 1940s and 50s America. You want side missions? Why would Vito be doing side missions? He's a made man. Like hell is he racing around, doing dirty jobs for someone other than who he's told to do jobs for, or doing pretty much anything else. I'd say the trash compactor and robbing grocery stores is kind of lame in that respect; it should have only been included in that one mission where you have to get $27k.

As I usually say when I post a comment on these videos, I wouldn't mind so much if people took the "reviews" as what they are: entertainment. But the problem is that there's much more sheep on this site that take these as fact than there are people who can think for themselves.

 

[justjrandomuser]

I'm still perched on the fence about whether to buy this one or not, and this review hasnt really helped me to jump to either side.

Yeah, I know what you mean. Sometimes Yahtzee tends to miss the good aspects of games.

You watch zp to decide if you buy a game? I just watch it for fun and fun it was^^ Otherwise you end up with maybe 3 games in 5 years, excellent games at least.

Well, no, I was just saying that I don't watch zp to decide if I buy a game, because like I just said, "sometimes Yahtzee tends to miss the good aspects of games."

Most of the time if Yahtzee doesn't at least half like it I'll stay away from it, but hey what can I say, I am sheep! I'd love for him to review Naughty Bear, it just seems like the kind of cutesy violence that he would have a field day with.

 

[Vrach]

I think the length of the prison term was determined because gasoline was rationed due to the war.

Spoiler

Yeah, it's a federal crime, but it's ridiculous to put you in the can for 10 years for such a crime and then not lift a finger over all the murders, blowing up buildings and such.

It takes you quite a while to get into the mafia itself in the storyline as well and you're a bottom feeder all the way through anyway, so it's not like you have the protection from them with the cops.

In the first Mafia game, Salieri clearly tells you he's paying the cops off, but not to get stupid or they'll hunt you down. Since you're talking to the head of the crime family right from the start, it makes sense that he does his part in protecting you and making sure you aren't caught for your crimes, but in Mafia 2, you're not a mafioso, you're just an ordinary goon hired by the mafia. Even when you're accepted into the family itself, you're never even mildly important, all your jobs are done on your own and often even against what your superiors asked you to do. It just doesn't hold up.

It's also just completely disappointing at how irrelevant the main character and in fact, the whole story is. Again, first Mafia game, you're pretty much the right hand of one of the biggest mafia bosses in the city. In the second, you go around running whatever chore they throw at you at the first promise of cash. The missions rarely amount to anything bigger and when they do, they don't really make sense.

I mean think about it. You're running the mafia. You need to kill the head of another crime family. Do you really send just the regular asshole who spends his day selling cigarettes from the back of a truck? Again, first game you earn your respect. They don't give you much credit right at the start, but you show them you're capable and take notice of it and use it. Second game they just chuck random jobs at you.

 

[FallenMessiah88]

Well what can i say! ZP+Brownies+Dr.Pepper = WIN!!

 

[dragonburner]

I thought that he would also rag on the melee, but no...

 

[hoov]

Strong episode this week. Though I do wonder if you lifted the pretty cars and fast women joke from "A bit of fry & laurie"

 

[JUMBO PALACE]

He's more than right about the ending unfortunately. Great game though!

 

[GLo Jones]

I completely agree about the freedom it gives you. The game could've been awesome if there was more you do in free roam.

I also liked the ending, that was

 

[Valagetti]

Mafia II is an anright game. Not great nor shit! It lacks what other sandbox games have, lots of gameplay. Sure you fight in Sicily during WWII, avoid getting raped in prison and pretty much become part of the family and wack people. But the game just ends very fast and abruptly. Theres side missions, not many or them,there also not very interesting and you never get to play the god damm things! Killing people is fun in this game, but theres only one way to do it! What about the occasional sniping and carbombs? And the AI, surprise surprise is awful! Bad guys just seem to run into your line of fire, mistaking it for candy or something? Now I know why the Mafia died out, they mistaked bullets for sugar coated heaven.
Some of you may think I'm being too harsh on the game, well I'm not. As a kid most of you wanted to be a cowboy or a astronaut. I wanted to be a mafia hitman. When I brought this game I thought there no way 2K can screw up a mafia game for me... but they did! For christs sake they made Bioshock! Well differrent makers, maybe those czech are too wasted on cheap vodka to make a decent game and not wasted enough to make a great game. And then, I remembered they made Bioshock 2... That had more leaks and holes in the story line itself, than Rapture.
Today, it seems like all games have to be sandboxed based. Mafia II is like Wolfenstein (2009), they put too much effort into making you roam around... BUT YOU HAVE NOT REASON TO ROAM AROUND, DUE TO THE FACT THERE IS NOTHING TO FIND. Also there both 'safe' games. They don't try anything new, it just looks around and coping whats going on, as if its a student during an exam and forgot to study... like me. Mafia II is like GTA4 crashed its badly controlled car into the Godfather! (Not the original, more like the 2nd one) And the end result is just average. Your sidekick is equally stupid and drunk as that guy in GTA4, that you have to pretty much be this taxi and take him to eat.
Now I can on for days tear apart Mafia II, like the story line is alright, though is bloody predictable, of course that mouthy gun tooting teenager gets killed and whenever that happens someone gets pissy and mows down a bunch of chinks.
I'll stop now.
There really isn't that much to the game. Killing people is basic, though entertaining. Soundtrack is fantastic. Driving is fun and losing cops is 'evener' better. Your environment constantly changes. And most of all, They don't rip off The Godfather. I don't advise buying Mafia II, hell no! I made that mistake. Hire it out instead and spend the money on food and electrity, unless you (still) live with your parents.

 

[ewhac]

Quick question, who is that one guy in each of the new ZP videos? I have no clue who he is nor was it ever explained but it is a real face of some dorky guy in each of the new videos.

Does this [/forums/jump/18.182077.5394427] answer your question?

 

[Swifteye]

Nice for entertainment, but like most of the reviews for this game, not really a review.

Think of it like going into Zelda: Wind Waker and critiquing it on it's puzzle abilities because it had a sliding puzzle. It gets a 6/10 because the puzzle was simple and there was only one. Reservoir Dogs gets a 4/10 because it's a shitty action movie. Machete gets 5.5/10 because it didn't hold up as a romance film. Get my drift?

Same idea when you critique Mafia II based on its open world environment and limitations. It's a simulation game, not a sandbox game. It simulates the life of Vito, a gangster in 1940s and 50s America. You want side missions? Why would Vito be doing side missions? He's a made man. Like hell is he racing around, doing dirty jobs for someone other than who he's told to do jobs for, or doing pretty much anything else. I'd say the trash compactor and robbing grocery stores is kind of lame in that respect; it should have only been included in that one mission where you have to get $27k.

As I usually say when I post a comment on these videos, I wouldn't mind so much if people took the "reviews" as what they are: entertainment. But the problem is that there's much more sheep on this site that take these as fact than there are people who can think for themselves.

I think the problem here is that the game felt like a sandbox game. Looked like a sandbox game. Was made similar to other games that were sandbox games. But wasn't one. However short of an interview with the designers of the game one wouldn't know that ahead of time. Thanks for calling people sheep though. Ya know that's always nice.

 

[Flutterbrave]

Black Books reference was win.

Indeed it was. Now that I think of it, Yahtzee is basically an Anglo-australian Dylan Moran anyway.

 

[codernator]

I know Yahtzee thought the scenery boring, but I think it's rather nice and a great step forward from the brown and grey bland-o-vision of the general FPS genre. Indeed, it's a perfect setting for a rampage style game, which must be why you can't do a bloody thing in it. They wouldn't want you to fuck up their hard work.

I want to request that sandbox games stop featuring driving sequences. Without a real driving interface, the cars invariably control like pile of bricks on a skateboard. Even the racing games that specialize in driving suck balls without a race wheel. Likewise, the mouse is not an appropriate control for fighter planes (harking back to the BF1942 days).

 

[FuQ Halo]

Your reviews never fail to entertain, unlike the games you review.

thanks

 

[Neferius]

Huh... my Godfather gave me an Erector-set, but after a year I lost a Quaker of all the pieces and all I could build was a Trolley

 

[NewYork_Comedian]

Lol, dont mean to be a wiseass here but on every forum ive seen before this review, anybody talking about mafia 2 said "Well not sandbox game has to be non-linear" and defending it with stuff like that, and now people are saying "totally agree, the game was meh." or "the game was shit".

Talk about being a little hypocritical.

 

[Dave Green]

I don't know if anyone else did it, (or if he even read it) but I messaged him 10 days ago telling him to review it.

 

[NewYork_Comedian]

I don't know if anyone else did it, (or if he even read it) but I messaged him 10 days ago telling him to review it.

Welcome to the escapist, and since your new here, you shouldn't know that it takes about 3 weeks after he makes a review for it to actually to be posted.

 

[schiz0phren1c]

Hey Yahtzee! you didnt finish the vi

 

[Necromancer1991]

A mafia plot that ends early, that sounds suspiciously like The Sop [Fade to Black]