Zero Punctuation: Mailbag Showdown

Jack Spencer Jr

New member
Dec 15, 2007
96
0
0
m_jim said:
Here's the problem with what you are saying... A) You are quoting a piece of crass commercialism that is a screed against crass commercialism and don't seem to see the irony of it. B) People don't stick to simply insulting what someone likes. These new kids decide that if someone likes a game that Overlord Yahtzee disapproves of, it is obviously indicative of a character flaw, so they insult accordingly.
I came up with direct response that consisted of two words, but let's try addressing you points directly.

A) Yes I did get the irony when watching the movie. Although that has fuck-all to do with the topic at hand. You might as well talk about sourdough starters or rainfall percentages in the Amazon river basin while you're at it.

B) The character flaw being demonstrated is not liking a game that Yahtzee gave an unfavorable review. He's given unfavorable reviews to other games, and the discussion threads didn't balloon this quickly. There must be some reason for it. Thee are actually two main possible reasons. The first Yahtzee gave in the Mailbag Showdown is that these people are not actually enjoying the game as much as they've convinced themselves that they are, so they react poorly to others confirming their own niggling doubts. The same thing happened when Phantom Menace came out. The second is what I've said, these are nerds with no self-esteem in themselves but in the games (and movies, and TV show, etc) of which they are fans. Both of these reasons indicate a pathetic immaturity, which only follows given the average age of Wii owners. But it is telling that Halo 3 did not warrant such a response, but that probably means that Halo 3 fans were too busy playing the game to give two shits about what Yahtzee had to say (unlike SSBB fans, apparently) or that Microsoft fanboys are more mature than Nintendo fanboys, which is a scary fucking thought.

And throughout this thread and the previous one are the constant piddling of the horse apple cobbler of "this is not a review" citing some minor detail or whatever that Yahtzee got "wrong." Since apparently you guys don't know, let me be the first to tell you: reviews are little more than advertising. For every person who is scared of some game by a review, there are like a million people who'll go buy it anyway. This explains why the Fantastic Four movies keep turning a profit. All a review does is make people aware that a game exists. The secondary purpose of reviews is to be entertaining to read in their own right. Any consumer advise found there is just getting some general idea of what the game is like, regardless of the reviewer's opinion. So whining about features that Yahtzee "got wrong" is at best misguided and at worst a thin veneer of bullshit to hide the real reason you're complaining, which is likely one of the two reasons above or a combination thereof.

But, all of that would fit better in the thread for the SSBB review. This thread is for the mailbag, which also exploded a bit, mostly because all of the SSBB fans took it personally, saying Yahtzee was portraying SSBB fans as a pack of grunting retards. (see, reason #2)

Since Yahtzee has not done a mailbag before, it's hard to judge if other mailbags would garner a similar response. But, he only had to select emails from the glut of responses he'd gotten to his review. I don't know if he used some kind of criteria for selecting these emails, such as selecting those that reflected a large number of the responses or if he just picked a few at random. But, in any case, Yahtzee isn't making SSBB fans look like twats as much as the chodes who'd written those emails in the first place... and continue to argue the point here. The actually intelligent SSBB fans... if they're even aware of this thread since they're too busy having fun playing the fucking game to give two shits... would probably die of embarrassment to be lumped into the same category as these idiots.
 

BYeth

New member
May 11, 2008
3
0
0
First post around here, let's see if people around here are smarter that those of other Forums.

First off, is it me or are the "terrible fanboys" not only coming from Nintendo, but other consoles? This is very hypocritical.

As pointed out earlier on in this thread (and as conveniently ignored), Nintendo fanboys aren't the only ones that are appearing here.

"OMG LOL YAHTZEE DID JUSTICE I TOLDZ DEM NITENDO FANBOIZ BRAWL SUX HAHAHA"

Is that not a form of fanboyism?

I've had massive fun with Brawl. Does that make me a stupid person? I'm a fan of Nintendo. Again, does that make me a stupid person?

Next, hypocrisy or contradictory, you decide.

"To bash people for their opinion is stupid"
And then later...
"I think Nintendo fanboys are stupid for liking Nintendo games."

Listen up, people. To like Nintendo doesn't automatically make a person "blindly embrace every game Nintendo throws at them".

Nintendo fans mostly find fun in them.

I believe part of the reasons Nintendo fans are so persistent is that Nintendo has been around for a long time. The sense of nostalgia lingers in Nintendo games. Brawl uses that to it's advantage. Even someone who has barely played any Nintendo games could be overwhelmed by nostalgia. Played Super Mario Land on the Gameboy? Easton Kingdom's music is in it. Played the first Pokémon? There's a whole ton of music in Brawl.

If Yahtzee is seeing this, I'd like you to understand some things.

"This game suffers from a problem common to all fighters. It can quickly descend into a fight that is no more challenging than hitting buttons over and over with no attempt at strategy. It's not a programming fault, but it's still there."
Go to "Group", open a CPU slot, change the CPU level to "9". Choose any character, choose Final Destination. Try button mashing. See how much "hitting buttons over and over" would help you. I dare you.

"The characters are too small and the camera zooms out too far."
Then try turning off the Deflickering and get a TV with a better definition. Unless your eyesight is THAT horrible, you SHOULD be able to see the characters even fully zoomed out in New Pork City (should be the largest stage iirc).

"The particle effects are distracting and obscure the action."
This is where I start to doubt you've played the game. The ONLY thing I can think of that obscures the action is the cracker launcher, and it's SUPPOSED to do that. The rest of everything has barely anything that "distracts" or "obscures the action".

"For a first time play, it is disappointing to have to unlock characters that have been hyped by the company for the new game."
Then go play Adventure Mode. Unless you haven't played platformers in your entire life, it'll only take about half a day give or take to unlock Sonic and Snake, and then some more.

"Some of the characters aren't that well known outside of Japan. Since this is a world-wide release, it should feature the more mainstream characters so that people can relate to the game better."
Mr. Game & Watch, Marth and Lucas. That's all. I think your "some" isn't that dramatic. The other 32 characters are probably well-known outside of Japan.

"The single player is good and a lot of hard work was put into it, but they make you go through it twice which becomes boring and repetitive to the point that you feel like you're stuck in "Groundhog Day.""
This I have absolutely no counter-argument to, simply because I feel the same, just not to such a dramatic extent.

"This game was disappointing because there is nothing new and interesting about it. It's the same old game repackaged and resold. Nintendo needs to develop some new concepts."
Subspace Emissary? Tons more customization? Online play? Boss Battles? More than 10 newcomers to the series? Assist trophies? Seriously, seriously. Think of a new "concept" for the Smash Bros. universe and I may give you a prize (cookies).

Have fun ripping apart my argument.
 

Kaos Incarnate

New member
May 7, 2008
94
0
0
Like I said earlier the problems he listed do seem similar to Melee's, so I doubt I will have as much of a problem with them as he did (plus I'm not that bothered about playing as Snake or Sonic). All I have to do is wait for another month till it is released over here.
 

BYeth

New member
May 11, 2008
3
0
0
Onto Yahtzee's review though, I loved it, although I found some things I glaringly disagreed with. I was laughing mostly throughout the whole review, until I remembered the hypocrites in the other forum for the Brawl review.
 

Sinfulfate

New member
Nov 7, 2007
4
0
0
Great video.

Its funny to see so much hate mail he got because of his Brawl review. Nintendo's games are like Madden. Madden games aren't great games at all but if your a fan of the series you will love them. Thats exactly how pretty much all Nintendo's games are.
 

Kaos Incarnate

New member
May 7, 2008
94
0
0
Sinfulfate said:
Great video.

Its funny to see so much hate mail he got because of his Brawl review. Nintendo's games are like Madden. Madden games aren't great games at all but if your a fan of the series you will love them. Thats exactly how pretty much all Nintendo's games are.
The World Ends With You is a completely new game on a Nintendo system, true it was developed by Square-enix and Jupiter, but still it shows that Nintendo are looking for things that are different.
 

kinkyiam

New member
May 11, 2008
1
0
0
I think it's normal for any critic to tell people at least once "fuck you", when they think they can do a better job. I watch these videos to have a good laugh and see what games are worth playing... if I want to here some fanboy ranting about his high score and how that games rock's, I wouldn't watch this.
 

Vigilance05

New member
Mar 14, 2008
2
0
0
Question- To the folks who are decrying Yahtzee's review of SSBB?

Do the word: "Opinion" ," Critic" and " Review" mean ANYTHING to you. If so, then you know that this is JUST ONE opinion in a sea of many voices either saying how much this game sucks or how much it rocks. Its one opinion. He can think what he likes. How on earth does it hurt you if he doesn't like the game. Do you honestly thing Nintendo is going to suddenly fall into bankruptcy because of one bad game review? If so, then you must be completely lost as to the behemoth Nintendo is.

If you enjoy the games, go play them. If not, then don't. If you hate it when people say the things you like suck, then go stick your head in the sand and ignore them. Honestly, if your so insecure that one review on a game you love makes you go this bonkers, then I suggest some sort of Nintendo support group. Maybe there is a group where you can all circle jerk yourself while you talk about how awesome mario is and how much Sony sucks.
 

Jesus-tits-Christ

New member
May 11, 2008
5
0
0
amonk said:
wow could you guys POSSIBLY suck this guys cock anymore?

seriously your the same people that think Maddox is a messiah for telling it how it is...

grow a pair of testicals and stop posting fucking useless praise comments you bunch of fags...
yeah.. whereas posting that was a TOTALLY valid use of your time...

dickhead..
 

Kaos Incarnate

New member
May 7, 2008
94
0
0
Question to those that are telling people to stop disagreeing with Yahtzee's review?

Can you stop saying that we should stop disagreeing with Yahtzee, sure he might be your god. What you are doing is saying stop posting our opinions on the matter, while saying respect Yahtzee's opinion on Brawl. That does seem a bit unfair, some of us aren't the "raving fanboys" that most of you will accuse us of. Heck, most people (like me) in Europe are waiting for it to be released, can't we post our opinions as long as we do it reasonably?
 

Jesus-tits-Christ

New member
May 11, 2008
5
0
0
BYeth said:
First post around here, let's see if people around here are smarter that those of other Forums.

First off, is it me or are the "terrible fanboys" not only coming from Nintendo, but other consoles? This is very hypocritical.

As pointed out earlier on in this thread (and as conveniently ignored), Nintendo fanboys aren't the only ones that are appearing here.

"OMG LOL YAHTZEE DID JUSTICE I TOLDZ DEM NITENDO FANBOIZ BRAWL SUX HAHAHA"

Is that not a form of fanboyism?

I've had massive fun with Brawl. Does that make me a stupid person? I'm a fan of Nintendo. Again, does that make me a stupid person?

Next, hypocrisy or contradictory, you decide.

"To bash people for their opinion is stupid"
And then later...
"I think Nintendo fanboys are stupid for liking Nintendo games."

Listen up, people. To like Nintendo doesn't automatically make a person "blindly embrace every game Nintendo throws at them".

Nintendo fans mostly find fun in them.

I believe part of the reasons Nintendo fans are so persistent is that Nintendo has been around for a long time. The sense of nostalgia lingers in Nintendo games. Brawl uses that to it's advantage. Even someone who has barely played any Nintendo games could be overwhelmed by nostalgia. Played Super Mario Land on the Gameboy? Easton Kingdom's music is in it. Played the first Pokémon? There's a whole ton of music in Brawl.

If Yahtzee is seeing this, I'd like you to understand some things.

"This game suffers from a problem common to all fighters. It can quickly descend into a fight that is no more challenging than hitting buttons over and over with no attempt at strategy. It's not a programming fault, but it's still there."
Go to "Group", open a CPU slot, change the CPU level to "9". Choose any character, choose Final Destination. Try button mashing. See how much "hitting buttons over and over" would help you. I dare you.

"The characters are too small and the camera zooms out too far."
Then try turning off the Deflickering and get a TV with a better definition. Unless your eyesight is THAT horrible, you SHOULD be able to see the characters even fully zoomed out in New Pork City (should be the largest stage iirc).

"The particle effects are distracting and obscure the action."
This is where I start to doubt you've played the game. The ONLY thing I can think of that obscures the action is the cracker launcher, and it's SUPPOSED to do that. The rest of everything has barely anything that "distracts" or "obscures the action".

"For a first time play, it is disappointing to have to unlock characters that have been hyped by the company for the new game."
Then go play Adventure Mode. Unless you haven't played platformers in your entire life, it'll only take about half a day give or take to unlock Sonic and Snake, and then some more.

"Some of the characters aren't that well known outside of Japan. Since this is a world-wide release, it should feature the more mainstream characters so that people can relate to the game better."
Mr. Game & Watch, Marth and Lucas. That's all. I think your "some" isn't that dramatic. The other 32 characters are probably well-known outside of Japan.

"The single player is good and a lot of hard work was put into it, but they make you go through it twice which becomes boring and repetitive to the point that you feel like you're stuck in "Groundhog Day.""
This I have absolutely no counter-argument to, simply because I feel the same, just not to such a dramatic extent.

"This game was disappointing because there is nothing new and interesting about it. It's the same old game repackaged and resold. Nintendo needs to develop some new concepts."
Subspace Emissary? Tons more customization? Online play? Boss Battles? More than 10 newcomers to the series? Assist trophies? Seriously, seriously. Think of a new "concept" for the Smash Bros. universe and I may give you a prize (cookies).

Have fun ripping apart my argument.
yahtzee READS these comments?
i mean i know he's a game reviewer n all...but NOBODY is sad enough to read 26 pages of this odd combination of sucking his's dick, essex style, and whining about how a funny cartoon/monologue may/may not be factually innacurate...
 

dade-

New member
Feb 12, 2008
16
0
0
rightwingisgood said:
Though once a game receives a certain level of hype is it possible for it to be anything other then overrated?
hype is the root of all evil. black and white and fable for instance. notice i'm picking on molyneux. it depends on you personally. if you let yourself get wrapped up in the hype of a release then yes, you will find it largely overrated if it doesn't deliver (which games rarely do so to their sometimes extreme hype).

hype created from developers should be expected. they want to sell their game. hype from fanboys/girls, and the general public (including tabloid mediums) should be kept at a distance so that you can make your own judgement without expectations of epicness. if you read reviews, don't take them as gospel. it's all opinion anyway.
 

theprinceofcamden

New member
May 11, 2008
9
0
0
I really don't think there is anything wrong with being a fanboy myself, and I loved the way Yartzee rationalized the notion by pointing out that most people defend their own console to the bitter end. (I myself am a nintendo/PC lover, and hate the evil playstaion in all its rubbish guises)
 

SickImperium

New member
May 11, 2008
4
0
0
This "review" was hilarious, especially the "FOUR-K YOU" bit. I'm so looking forward to the GTAIV one, that game has fast become one of my favourites of all time and yet I can't wait for yahtzee to slaughter it. I guess this is what happens when you learn how to appreciate a good sense of humour and not to be a multi-million dollar corporation's little internet *****.