Zero Punctuation: Pikmin 3

[Yahtzee Croshaw]

Pikmin 3

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews Pikmin 3.

Watch Video

 

[ZZoMBiE13]

Escapist Magazine: The Darkness where the nerds belong

Seriously guys, this should be your tagline from now on!

 

[Genocidicles]

I'm sorry but the references to the Battle of Somme were highly distressing to me. The Battle of Somme is one of the bloodiest battles in human history, where over a million men were wounded or killed. It makes me sick that such a thing was made light of, and I request that it be changed.

I can't in good conscience continue watching Zero Punctuation after that. It made me feel uneasy, and I'm ashamed Mr Croshaw brought it up.

 

[RJ Dalton]

I'm probably going to get crap for this, but the dodo didn't go extinct from people eating them. If you read the journal entries of people who arrived on the islands, they tried eating them at first, but something about their biology caused their meat to be really greasy and have a really bad taste, so nobody could stomach it. The dodo's went extinct because humans introduced a series of new predators to the islands. Dogs and pigs, mostly. The pigs ate the eggs constantly.

 

[PsychedelicDiamond]

Yahtzee, being german i'm offended by your reference to german scatporn.

Not only does ignore all the other varieties of hardcore fetish porn my great country produces, it also completely disregards the high quality scatporn made by other countries which i'm sure is going to offend shit fetishists from all over the world. I demand that you change it to something less inflammatory until next week otherwise i'm afraid i'm going to have to complain on the internet and pretend that anyone cares for my hurt feelings!

 

[kailus13]

I'm probably going to get crap for this, but the dodo didn't go extinct from people eating them. If you read the journal entries of people who arrived on the islands, they tried eating them at first, but something about their biology caused their meat to be really greasy and have a really bad taste, so nobody could stomach it. The dodo's went extinct because humans introduced a series of new predators to the islands. Dogs and pigs, mostly. The pigs ate the eggs constantly.

Didn't the pigs also eat everything the dodos ate, thus dooming them to starvation?

I wonder how long it'll take for someone to translate that german phrase.

 

[Laughing Man]

That joke at the end about throwing vegetables I am just gonna wait for the uproar from the coma patient community.

 

[manicfoot]

Uhh... Why didn't Yahtzee bother to check out the other control schemes? Wii remote + Nunchuck is much more intuitive than the GamePad.

 

[Ayay]

Never could get into the first game .this looks the same so screw it . And btw her i was thinking Yahtzee was a man´s man but sitting down taking a pee hmm thats so girly

 

[Something Amyss]

Has anyone called Yahtzee TEH BIAS yet? If so, I want to be the first. Oh Yahtzee, yhou obviously hate every Nintendo game ever, you charismatic stallion.

Escapist Magazine: The Darkness where the nerds belong

Seriously guys, this should be your tagline from now on!

I'm sold.

I'm probably going to get crap for this, but the dodo didn't go extinct from people eating them. If you read the journal entries of people who arrived on the islands, they tried eating them at first, but something about their biology caused their meat to be really greasy and have a really bad taste, so nobody could stomach it. The dodo's went extinct because humans introduced a series of new predators to the islands. Dogs and pigs, mostly. The pigs ate the eggs constantly.

I don't think that would come off as very funny, though. Except in an Angry Birds review.

 

[Casual Shinji]

You know, I could already sense the amount posters waiting behind the bleachers with baseball bats for this Zero Punctuation, aching to get a crack at Yahtzee.

 

[KDR_11k]

Controlling the aiming cursor is done with the Wiimote, not the gamepad (which is used for giving long distance marching orders to your commanders) but I guess Yahtzee's Wiimotephobia is still in effect. I suppose his hate of RTS will also prevent any Dragon Commander reviews.

 

[Xeorm]

Curious. For anyone that's played the earlier games, was this version all that much harder to control?

It sounded like they changed the control mechanics drastically from the first two, and while it was never exactly pinpoint accuracy, it was fairly straightforward.

 

[ToastiestZombie]

Uhh... Why didn't Yahtzee bother to check out the other control schemes? Wii remote + Nunchuck is much more intuitive than the GamePad.

Because Yahtzee has had a terrible fear of Wii Remotes ever since he was mugged by a gang of Wii Remotes weilding nunchucks. The irrational ignorance of the way the game is actually meant to be played is probably due to that.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Yahtzee, being german i'm offended by your reference to german scatporn.

Not only does ignore all the other varieties of hardcore fetish porn my great country produces, it also completely disregards the high quality scatporn made by other countries which i'm sure is going to offend shit fetishists from all over the world. I demand that you change it to something less inflammatory until next week otherwise i'm afraid i'm going to have to complain on the internet and pretend that anyone cares for my hurt feelings!

I'm sorry but the references to the Battle of Somme were highly distressing to me. The Battle of Somme is one of the bloodiest battles in human history, where over a million men were wounded or killed. It makes me sick that such a thing was made light of, and I request that it be changed.

I can't in good conscience continue watching Zero Punctuation after that. It made me feel uneasy, and I'm ashamed Mr Croshaw brought it up.

Damn, you've already taken 2 points to complain about, so I need something new...

Well, I am not a nazi, otherwise I could complain about him always hurting my feelings by making fun of ze glorious Führer...

OK, as a hungry foreign sailor, I demand you change your depiction of my culture, seeing as we never stuffed our Dodos with chestnut stuffing.
I find your suggestion that we did so very offensive and shall now complain to the internet, demanding that my feelings be considered in every form of entertainment.


And as a survivor of the great guinea-pig massacre of 2009, I demand you change your depiction of guinea pigs as "innocent" creatures in that one throwaway joke, for they massacred many of us and left me heavily traumatized and having to see a guinea pig not only triggered these memories again, but having to endure being told that they are "innocent" creatures is just adding insult to injury.

That joke at the end about throwing vegetables I am just gonna wait for the uproar from the coma patient community.

Well you're damn right about that.
As someone who is currently in a deep coma, I expect an official apology from Mr Croshaw. Him making fun of my lifestyle choices is unacceptable and I shall piss through his mailslot if he does not issue a formal apopology and make a considerable donation to our cause.

 

[ToastiestZombie]

Curious. For anyone that's played the earlier games, was this version all that much harder to control?

It sounded like they changed the control mechanics drastically from the first two, and while it was never exactly pinpoint accuracy, it was fairly straightforward.

Well if you use the Wii Remote Plus and nunchuck it has the best and most precise controls of the series.

 

[Covarr]

Curious. For anyone that's played the earlier games, was this version all that much harder to control?

It sounded like they changed the control mechanics drastically from the first two, and while it was never exactly pinpoint accuracy, it was fairly straightforward.

If you use the Wii Remote + Nunchuk controls, it's actually significantly better than the first two (and pretty much the same as the New Play Control versions of 1 and 2).

P.S. Thanks

 

[Thaluikhain]

You know, I could already sense the amount posters waiting behind the bleachers with baseball bats for this Zero Punctuation, aching to get a crack at Yahtzee.

Heh, yeah. Ah well, at least nobody is getting banned for just posting "First!" like they used to.

Nineteenth!

 

[slacker2]

edit: wrong quote