Zero Punctuation: Quantum Conundrum

[Vulpis]

It always bugged me that this was in a guy's house.

I mean, this guy LIVES in a house that can't be navigated without using an alternate dimension to place a safe on a button. Which brings me nicely to point 2....how many god damn safes does one man need?

At least portal was a deliberate rat in a maze scenario.

And then there are the gameplay goofs like the pin precision jumps. I'd also say its a lot less intuitive than portal was. I never had to think WHAT to do in portal, just how. QC had me very confused as to what the aim was in several places.

Well it *is* stated pretty early on in the story that there's malfunctioning matter replicators involved (and I seem to recall a 'Can't have too many coffee tables!' line, as well). Why the complex locks and switches are needed just to get around the house--now *there's* a valid question, which isn't answered by the 'things are broken' excuse.

One thing that does bug me about Yahtzee and his forum-buddy there is that I have a pretty crappy system as far as modern gaming systems go (only dual-core, and a GeForce 9800 GTX+ video card, which is pretty much bottom of the line for 'modern' games), and I had little or no problem with it. Though the way he describes the power lines running--it makes me wonder if it actually *was* a system issue, or if he was running into problems with the Slow-Mo dimension, as there were puzzles *based* around the idea of triggering the switch and racing to the door before the power got there, because it didn't stay open very long.

As far as the platforming...I have mixed agreement there. Yeah, the smaller objects were a pain in the tail (though I think it was even more of a problem controlling them once you got on them, particularly for the various 'flying' routines where you had to feather the reverse-grav on and off), but...not especially impossible.

 

[CardinalPiggles]

Oh dear, no graphic settings? No sale. I made this mistake with Magicka a year or so ago, never again.

 

[Vulpis]

Actually you know what, screw it, I'm throwing my two cents in.

How to best enjoy a "hardcore" PC game: Fuck around with the ini. files for an hour until it runs perfectly, alt tabbing occasionally to browse the forums to see if other people have been having the same problems as you and know how to fix it. This tactics as best supported by: the majority of PC gamers (going by what the consensus in this very topic seems to be, at least, that the guy Yahtzee talked about at the end was right and he was a douche for calling his douchebaggery out for what it was.)

How to best enjoy a "hardcore" console game: Put the disc into the console. Play it. As supported by: common fucking sense.

Not really. Try 'Put the disc into the console. Wait for it to install to the hard drive. Wait for it to call home, see if there are patches, and install *those*, while staring at ads for Facebook and social networking sites since for some reason the console won't let you do too much else while letting the game patch in the background, as opposed to how it updates on a PC. Fix dinner and get some sleep while waiting for the patches to finish due to the network being slower than two tin cans and a string. Play the game, and try to rememeber why you wanted to play this in the first place.' Mind you, this is PSN--XBL may provide better results.

I *really* miss the 'Put the disc in and play' days...which is why console-wise I stick with my PS2 and am reluctant to borrow my brother's PS3. :-/

 

[FalloutJack]

I would just like to point out one TINY thing about the frame-rate thing. Right, I have this game and it's on Alienware, so it works very nicely. My girlfriend, who originally got me the game, received a copy of it from me and her computer is not so advanced. Just your basic home computer with a few niceties, not a GAMING computer. Still runs. Yahtzee, we understand that you don't like other people harping you about computer specs. I, for one, am not nearly a PC gamer because I favor console games more. Even still, the game doesn't require a chugging Nascar engine of a system to run. Not really. Fairly streamlined. Suffice to say, I'm having fun with this game and that's what's important.

 

[Vulpis]

Presuming that the torches and pitchforks folks even got the right victim here (and I do agree with the posters saying that that kind of stalking should be bannable), am I the only one amused that the person who presented a rational, thought out examination of the post is called 'mindlesspuppet'? ;-)

Again assuming that actually *is* the post Yahtzee is referring to, the puppet's right--it's pretty much the opposite of what Yahtzee was actually complaining about. Bad form, Ben. :-/
And as for the 'He says that anyone with gaming experience should be able to do it, but doesn't actually explain it himself'--makes sense, given anyone who's been around gaming for more than a few years should *also* be able to use this little thing called 'Google' (or something similar) to do the research to find out the information and much much more.
About the only thing I can see to gripe about in what the puppet quoted is the line wondering what you're playing if your system can't meet recent game specs--*that* kind of attitude deserves my library of DOS games dumped on their heads. ;-)

 

[Aprilgold]

Quantum Conundrum was OK from what I've played. It was just to simple to do. Sure Portal was simple but I had to something stop and go "Boy how do I beat this one" but in Conundrum its just "DERP STACK COUCH THEN THROW SAFE IN FLUFFY ZONE THEN HALFWAY CHANGE IT TO NORMAL SO IT BREAK GLASS!" Which isn't that fun. Your more guranteed to die from this first-person one because its in Unreal Engine 3, a engine which should NEVER be used in jumping games.

 

[DolorousEdd]

Oh, I hate these hardware and IT cunts as well. And many others like them.

 

[Dooly95]

Not really. Try 'Put the disc into the console. Wait for it to install to the hard drive. Wait for it to call home, see if there are patches, and install *those*, while staring at ads for Facebook and social networking sites since for some reason the console won't let you do too much else while letting the game patch in the background, as opposed to how it updates on a PC. Fix dinner and get some sleep while waiting for the patches to finish due to the network being slower than two tin cans and a string. Play the game, and try to rememeber why you wanted to play this in the first place.' Mind you, this is PSN--XBL may provide better results.

I *really* miss the 'Put the disc in and play' days...which is why console-wise I stick with my PS2 and am reluctant to borrow my brother's PS3. :-/

Although, 'the console does everything for you' compared to 'you fiddle around the .ini files because the devs only programmed to have it optimized on ONE particular machine, which unfortunately wasn't yours'... I dunno. I like my odds with the console, to be honest.

You'd have to go through the same process of downloading patches on a PC anyway. If your connection is as slow as you say, then...

 

[Vigormortis]

Finally! Somebody else on this planet who absolutely hates motion blur in video games. It's always the first thing I turn off in graphics.

I only hate when it's implemented poorly. Which, honestly, is often the case with most games.

However, when it's used subtly, and only in moments of extreme motion (and coupled with a very slight DOF effect), it can make a game seem quite cinematic. At least, in terms of it's look.

Is it necessary? Of course not. But again, done well it can add that little extra "oomph" to a graphical engine.

Finally! Someone not afraid to call out elitists. Seriously. I like hanging around P.C. forums and tech forums to nerd out over the latest hardware, but the things like wot Mr Croshaw describes in this video really pisses me off.

Same here. I'm an avid PC gamer, have been for years now, and I love keeping "mostly" up-to-date on the latest tech and advancements. As for consoles, even though I grew up playing on them, I find it harder and harder to even want to play on them anymore. (save for my collection of old consoles. gotta love the classics.)

However, I can not fucking stand the elitists, often in the minority, who scream and yell and insult on forums like that. I don't care if their elitist stance is for PC, a console, a game, or a developer. They really just need to grow the hell up and stop being a prick.

 

[Jailbird408]

Yahtzee: *calls someone a *****
Escapist Magazine reaction: *keeps making videos out of it*

Escapist forumer: *calls someone a *****
Escapist Magazine reaction: *bans forumer*

Cool story, Escapist Magazine.

Escapist Magazine reaction: *bans forumer*
But in all seriousness... uh...
I was going to say something about ponies, but... Yeah, I got nothing.

 

[PurePareidolia]

I really enjoyed Quantum Conundrum. Possibly because I played through Half Life enough as a child that I could navigate Xen without any trouble, so the first person platforming didn't bother me that much. That meant I could just fly around on sofas with impunity, and didn't have to care about the shockingly bad decision not to include player legs/3rd person mode/some sort of auto-jump targeting.

Captcha: hard and fast

 

[Endocrom]

In case anybody was wondering, Sarah Winchester (as in Winchester firearms) was a crazy rich lady who believed that if she ever finished construction on her home, ghosts would come and kill her. So she kept adding to it. Now it's a twisted maze of dead-ends, doors opening up to open air and pointless stairways.

 

[CheckD3]

Every PC gamer who is trying to stop people hating on them probably face palmed when Yahtzee pointed out what he did

It's easy to see why the game is less fun than it sounds on paper, cause paper is a flimsy thing that gets see through when you rub grease on it. Best things in life come unexpected and without anything to compare it too. That's why Rick Astley will ever be known for only one song and most people won't even know who he is half the time.

 

[Adam Loughnane]

"...into a ring of hungry wolves."

That was my favorite bit.

 

[FallenMessiah88]

So I finally decided to goo and watch some footage of this game. It looks alright if a little too portal-ish. The thing is though, I'm just not a big fan of puzzle games. Still, seems worth a try.

 

[Hungry Donner]

I really enjoyed QC, but some of the puzzles are really twitchy, and they were often over needlessly lethal pools of water. Portal had plenty of lethal floors, but I didn't fall into them with any frequency.

I am looking forward to the DLC, and I mostly enjoyed completing the shift and time challenges (although a handful of the latter were brutal).

 

[Waaghpowa]

I would just like to mention that at no point did they guy say that "you're not a PC gamer if you don't own a high end system". He said

"PC gamers need a gaming PC. Not a triple-SLI, nitrogen cooled, plutonium powered Pineapple systems 74, but at the least a reasonably fast dual core and reasonable fast graphics card."

If you read later on, when he says gaming PC he says

I said a PC gamer must have a gaming PC. Just like a 360 gamer must have a 360. It's the minimum requirement for entry to the club

Nowhere did he say that you need to have a high end pc to play PC games, he simply said you needed a PC capable of running the games on their minimum settings.

Also, if you actually read the post, his reply is in regards to the OP's comment regarding being a PC gamer since the "Dawn of 3D games" and that Quantum Conundrum needed additional graphics options. His response was merely to point out that in the "dawn of 3D gaming", there weren't interface options for graphics or resolutions and you had to know how to edit .ini files to do so. Basically he called the OP out as being someone who hasn't been gaming since the "dawn of 3D gaming", because if he had, he would full well know how to edit the .ini files to get the settings he wants.

Sure, he sounds like a jerk for calling him out, but he's not being elitist. He's simply pointing out that all the options that the OP was looking for were available given that he really was from "the dawn of 3D gaming".

It helps that you read the post comprehensively before going around calling people cunts.

-Link removed by Mod

 

[xorinite]

Here is the c-- he is poster number
Prepare the flamethrowers

I'm sorry, but am I the only one that thinks the kid had a perfectly reasonable response and Yahtzee simply made him sound like some elitest PC gaming ****?

You are not the only one who thinks this. I found his post, read it and then shrugged. Its nothing to get excited about and personally I think he has a point.

I believe Yahtzee plays games on a laptop, and while its nice that pc architecture is modular and unified so that it's possible to put components together in any form and then run games on them, its not really a fair comparison as a platform to an 360 or PS3, since neither of which is a mobile platform and therefore neither of which has its processing power gimped.

I know! Those evil, evil consoles! Giving games to people who paid less than you!

Wait, paid less?

I bought the PC version of DE:HR on release day for like £27.
I think on the 360 it was £39.99
(just checking...)
**** me, it was £49.99.
Gee, I wonder why the second hand market is so big, thank goodness it exists, that is price jump is absurd.

Edit: Oh I read your other post, $3000 for a PC, for $3000 Id want it gold plated and studded with precious gems. I paid about £325 (plugged into my TV btw) which is slightly more than my PS3 yet I've made the money back easily in the significantly lower cost of games. I made my friend a gaming PC for £250 and it can run Skyrim on default high settings no problem.

I've thought about spending more on a PC, although I settled with the idea that its a bit excessive to spend £600 just to be able to run my dwarf fortress smoothly.

Edit 2: I spent more on a gaming laptop than my desktop, about £500. It ran almost everything without complaint, however it was made by Sony who decided to solder the graphics chips on with jelly. Lesson learned; desktop is how you game on pc.

 

[jamesbrown]

It always bugged me that this was in a guy's house.

I mean, this guy LIVES in a house that can't be navigated without using an alternate dimension to place a safe on a button. Which brings me nicely to point 2....how many god damn safes does one man need?

At least portal was a deliberate rat in a maze scenario.

And then there are the gameplay goofs like the pin precision jumps. I'd also say its a lot less intuitive than portal was. I never had to think WHAT to do in portal, just how. QC had me very confused as to what the aim was in several places.

Maybe instead of a seperate testing area, he turned his house into a testing area; room by room; until he was trapped deep in it. Why buy a seperate property when you can use the one you got

 

[duchaked]

lol lot of Internet action after this...well okay that's a drop in the ocean but whatever. it's easy for people to be aggressive "counts" from behind a computer screen after all much more passive in real life, but still "counts" haha