My sentiments exactly. He says he states his opinion, and I believe it. He said some things were fun, even if the emphasis was somewhat more on the bad things, and he even gave Crysis a fair recommendation, so it isn't all mudslinging, right?Sylocat said:3. And, indirectly, the lot of you who start yammering about how Yahtzee "isn't a real reviewer" and "isn't funny anymore" whenever he bashes a game you don't want him to bash.
Zero Punctuation: The Witcher
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
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I don't think the great stallion is interested in bestiality games staring dumb blonde's...altho......Rodge said:
My main 2 complaints about the gameSylocat said:I haven't played The Witcher, and I might give it a try even despite Yahtzee's objections because I've heard that once you get past the confusing interface it actually grants you some REAL moral choices, rather than just presenting you with saint-or-Skeletor either-or options over and over again. But in spite of that, this review touched on a couple of things that I've been griping about for years:
1. Entertainment that pretends to me "mature" just because it has a lot of swearing and PG-13 sexual situations. Look at the late-night fratboy cartoons (criticizing Family Guy on the internet, even on a board that prides itself on having some semblance of intelligence, is a one-way ticket to flameville, but I hate it, so fuck you, I'll criticize it) that call themselves "for mature audiences" just because they have a lot of ugly characters with grating voices yammering about bodily functions. Why do things get rated "mature" by having some of the most immature material imaginable?
2. PC users' superiority complex. I've tried to stay out of the flame wars on here between the consoletards and the PC Master Race, but boy did I ever laugh when Yahtzee went on the tirade about "typically designed to be as complex and unintuitive as possible so that those dirty console-playing peasants don't ruin it for the glorious PC-gaming master race." (note that I am a PC gamer as well as a console gamer, so this isn't a "nyah nyah u PC snobs suck" so much as it's a "don't take our preferences so fucking seriously all the damn time")
3. And, indirectly, the lot of you who start yammering about how Yahtzee "isn't a real reviewer" and "isn't funny anymore" whenever he bashes a game you don't want him to bash.
1.it tries not to be a point and click action RPG and fails, dodging is cute until you realize it serves no real purpose other then..."hey this is moving from KOTO to a diablo clone wat to do let strow in dodge and remove most of the pause command system lulz"
2.Menu system and even combat is needlessly cumbersome and out of the box you cannot rebind the keys/commands right because of bugs.
Past all that the english dialog is annoying sometimes...I got to the point to drop the polish voice tracks in it and leave the wonky english subtitle in, the experience improves, is like moving from a poorly dubbed anime game to a import that sounds a hell of a lot better even if you have to learn to play it since you can't read it..only this you can read....
One could say this is like a game version of the the brotherhood of the wolf the myth and sex factors make it a worthwhile film same for the witcher more or less, theres enough in it to make it worth while if you can get over the kneeing in the groin parts.
the review also had me laughing, pretty much like like every yatzee so far, whether i played the reviewed game or not. but this one I found a bit too harsh. lots of stuff he critizes is true, yeah, the researching, the point-click-combat (that actually had me frustrated for half an hour till I got the yist of it, then it was cake). but it didn't bother me as much. the combat was actually pretty nice, different styles for different enemies/situation, like Kotor. Alchemy could be more intuitive, as well as the researching bit, but well, nobody's perfect. I got through it and I really enjoyed the game, even more than the Kotor or NWN series. The only game that got close in atmosphere was Gothic 1&2.
I thought Yathzee reviews were supposed to be 'intelligent'. That is what the ads say and private advertisements are always right and the state is always wrong.
First it was the potty humour and unnecessary sexual jokes. Now Yahtzee is dissin' on tha Witcha because it is apparently not easy and intuitive to use - which translates to 'I want instant gratification and I want it now'.
I believed the Escapist was about games as art, or at least something more than dumb mindless entertainment. But apparently for the loudest voice of the Escapist an RPG is considered bad if the interface is not watered down for console controllers with two buttons, 'Kill everything ninja style' and 'Kill everything manga style'.
I am sure Yathzee thinks the paragon of modern RPGs is God of War because it has the coolest moves. At least in God of War, you do not have to make that annoying and overly difficult choice between strong, fast and group attacks that totally draws you right out of the game. You do not even have to run around between NPCs who all seem to take this monster-pwning thing way too seriously, almost like they were a character in a role-playing setting.
I have not played The Witcher because it is not my kind of game, but with reviews like that, who needs EA?
First it was the potty humour and unnecessary sexual jokes. Now Yahtzee is dissin' on tha Witcha because it is apparently not easy and intuitive to use - which translates to 'I want instant gratification and I want it now'.
I believed the Escapist was about games as art, or at least something more than dumb mindless entertainment. But apparently for the loudest voice of the Escapist an RPG is considered bad if the interface is not watered down for console controllers with two buttons, 'Kill everything ninja style' and 'Kill everything manga style'.
I am sure Yathzee thinks the paragon of modern RPGs is God of War because it has the coolest moves. At least in God of War, you do not have to make that annoying and overly difficult choice between strong, fast and group attacks that totally draws you right out of the game. You do not even have to run around between NPCs who all seem to take this monster-pwning thing way too seriously, almost like they were a character in a role-playing setting.
I have not played The Witcher because it is not my kind of game, but with reviews like that, who needs EA?
I think Yahtzee's point about the gameplay was that it feels like work, which I believe he states verbatim in the review. Not that it didn't give him instant gratification but that you play a game to...well...PLAY a game. When the controls and interface become so bogged down the game ceases to be fun and begins to be frustrating. There is value in simplicity.
yes, there is, and The Witcher isn't as "intuitive" or effortless as it could be - but nowadays a lot of games ain't. And if I have to push through that pain-phase to be rewarded with a great gaming experience - so be it. But well, guess opinions differ on that. Yatzee called it First Impression so I guess it's ok, as long as it's not supposed to be a in-depth review of the game.
Good points. And I think it should also be taken into consideration that these reviews are supposed to be negative and funny. I'm sure there were good points of the game but that just isn't going to send me rollin' on the floor. I mean...what do you expect from a fellow who ranked Adventures of Dizzy as the greatest game ever.
QFE. Our man Yahtz obviously didn't get to 90% of the content.Shinsquall said:
The only knock that the Witcher deserves is that its starting area is far, far too long, boring, and slow-paced. I almost quit playing before it ended as well -- but once you arrive in the city, the game becomes one of the finest RPGs I've played on a PC to-date (maybe KOTOR still beats it, but whatever: it's fucking close).
I love this dude's reviews, but I was pretty disappointed today. Though in retrospect, I can't say that it's out of character as he does seem thoroughly incapable of enjoying any game that requires reading anything longer than three or four words at a time.
If you're still considering checking this title out, I highly recommend that you ignore Yahtzee's shallow and inaccurate synopsis and do so at your earliest opportunity. I believe Fileplanet is still offering a demo of the thing for members.
Guys, for those complaining that Yazthee hates games with lots of text:
He wrote story-based adventure games WITH lots of texts. That how he gained his fame. That why he managed to actually get the attention necessary to go and review games. Before you deride him for coming up with lame storylines, why not play his FREE games with storylines? (Never said the storylines were good, even though I think they are, but hey, at least he is a game writer who doesn't want too much text, short, snappy, to the point...at least that what he said. To me, his games has "about the same amount of text" as a regular RPG, but heh.)
http://www.fullyramblomatic.com/games.htm
He wrote story-based adventure games WITH lots of texts. That how he gained his fame. That why he managed to actually get the attention necessary to go and review games. Before you deride him for coming up with lame storylines, why not play his FREE games with storylines? (Never said the storylines were good, even though I think they are, but hey, at least he is a game writer who doesn't want too much text, short, snappy, to the point...at least that what he said. To me, his games has "about the same amount of text" as a regular RPG, but heh.)
http://www.fullyramblomatic.com/games.htm
Now, there is a difference between yon Traditional RPG, and the subclass of RPGs which are, or play like, MMORPGS. In the former, while you do have to grind some, you don't have to FARM EPIC MOBZ. And the combat, depending on if turn-based or semi-action, is generally moar than.. well, one click. Also, while you may have quests and things, you have less of the Collect 10 Heads of My Enemies type quests. Et al.
So anyway. Whether or not he likes RPGs, I think what's real obvious is not liking the MMORPG playstyle, whether or not the game is, in fact, multi-player. You can and should Do Moar with the quests if you're not lightening the system up to function while carrying the weight of tons or players humping on your server.
So anyway. Whether or not he likes RPGs, I think what's real obvious is not liking the MMORPG playstyle, whether or not the game is, in fact, multi-player. You can and should Do Moar with the quests if you're not lightening the system up to function while carrying the weight of tons or players humping on your server.
Dear everyone who is all 'well he clearly didn't play the whole game hurr':
OF COURSE HE DIDN'T PLAY THE WHOLE GAME. THAT'S THE POINT- HE COULDN'T PLAY THE WHOLE GAME BECAUSE IT FELT LIKE WORK*. THAT'S WHY THIS ONE IS TITLED 'FIRST IMPRESSIONS' INSTEAD OF 'A COMPLETELY FAIR AND BALANCED REVIEW OF THE WITCHER'S 80+ HOURS OF PLAY BY A MAN WHO LOVES GRIND AND KILLING GENERIC MONSTERS FOR CASH'!
I will probably regret yelling in the morning, so I'll apologise to you all now. Sorry. I am going to sleep.
*This was also brought up in... Super Paper Mario, I think? You know, with the penguin-on-a-stick. Games should be entertaining to the person who's playing them.
OF COURSE HE DIDN'T PLAY THE WHOLE GAME. THAT'S THE POINT- HE COULDN'T PLAY THE WHOLE GAME BECAUSE IT FELT LIKE WORK*. THAT'S WHY THIS ONE IS TITLED 'FIRST IMPRESSIONS' INSTEAD OF 'A COMPLETELY FAIR AND BALANCED REVIEW OF THE WITCHER'S 80+ HOURS OF PLAY BY A MAN WHO LOVES GRIND AND KILLING GENERIC MONSTERS FOR CASH'!
I will probably regret yelling in the morning, so I'll apologise to you all now. Sorry. I am going to sleep.
*This was also brought up in... Super Paper Mario, I think? You know, with the penguin-on-a-stick. Games should be entertaining to the person who's playing them.
Love it...Yahtzee is funny until someone's favorite game gets hurt!
Personally, the Witcher is shaping up to be my favorite RPG ever, but the review was funny as hell nonetheless. And yes, the game gets off to a shitty start. I'm in chapter 2 right now though and it's a different game at this point...
As a game journalist, you probably have a shitload to play as it is, but if you ever find the time to get past the first couple hours of the game, give it a shot...you'll find a lot of the stuff you complain about is cured. The only MMORPG type quests are side quests called contracts. Otherwise, it's all pretty thick with story.
Personally, the Witcher is shaping up to be my favorite RPG ever, but the review was funny as hell nonetheless. And yes, the game gets off to a shitty start. I'm in chapter 2 right now though and it's a different game at this point...
As a game journalist, you probably have a shitload to play as it is, but if you ever find the time to get past the first couple hours of the game, give it a shot...you'll find a lot of the stuff you complain about is cured. The only MMORPG type quests are side quests called contracts. Otherwise, it's all pretty thick with story.
Now it's 4%.Kadayi said:And only 3% of the people who read that article agreed with it. The other 97% asked for the reviewer to be fired for ineptness.SilentScope001 said:
Honestly, why do people scream when someone disagrees with them? Sounds utterly useless. <snips argument where I try to argue that the game is in fact bad because I realize that just hypocritical, but I have read the storyline and didn't like it>
Fun is relative, guys!