Magic system is well made if your attention span exceeds that of a cat noticing a string during a hunt. Combat system takes a bit of practice and the shield issue does annoy me. The graphics are excellent if your computer wasn't made in the early 90's. The NPC's are dumb as rocks but will kick your ass if you fuck up. If you actually get into the story it's very good as those "mediocre" quests do actually have meaning most of the time. I too found his voice strained and unrealistic as if the character was voiced by a guy who really wanted diversity in the characters and tried to whisper/talk quietly in order to achieve said goal. I always thought that the locks sounded like the cocking of a shotgun. I noticed that you didn't mention the alchemy system. I imagine because it's an excellent aspect and we simply can't have any positive content in your sad existence. (I mean it, you having to play those awful games would make me want to run to a foreign country and start anew.)
Zero Punctuation: Two Worlds II
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
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Why is that so funny?!? I literally just laughed for a whole two minutes at that one photo!arc1991 said:
Wow they made a very crappy sequal to a very crappy game in the first place. No really why the hell do you have to do a check list routine to just kill something... usually you think you die,
what a crappy sequal
what a crappy sequal
Squilookle said:
Zudarkness said:
Exterminas said:
.Strife17O7 said:
Having played the game I can tell you this: It's pretty darned good. Yahtzee's only real complaint was that he didn't understand the quick set selector, where in you can put a whole set or armor and weapons on a key to swap at any time. I want you to run your fingers across your number pad 5 and 4 keys and tell me if they feel the same. And I'm happy with that said he wasn't really all that negative. Always assume he's blowing something out of proportion. You DON'T have to do a crappy check list, but it would have been nice if you didn't have to manually sheath and un sheath your weapon. If you don't actually pull your weapon out your character starts doing unarmed attacks. Which suck and will make you die. They apparently don't kill people? But most people/animals/monsters/demons don't care about your well being so good luck with that. And it's easy to forget you have to pull the weapon out. It's a minor nuisance but it's not as game breaking as he makes it sound.Dead Raen said:
That magic creation system is pretty neat. Say you have a fireball attack. You'd make that by combining fire and projectile cards. Add a powercard and now you have a massive fireball attack. Add a homing and a richochet card and now you have a massive fireball that kills something then bounces to another enemy and kills it too. Add a summon card and suddenly you have a massive burning hell hound that tracks down your enemies for you. Take away the power card and he's now a tiny burning hell hound. Take away the dog/summon card and add a wind card, put two of the powercards back in, take out the homing card. Now you're making fire tornados that suck enemies into them.
Exactly. This guy. He gets it.wtfclowns said:I don't know, the magic system was pretty good once you got into it. Any game that lets me fire a fireball that explodes and summons 6 stone golems on contact is okay in my book.
The game has some wonderful writing that turns RPG conventions on it's head. You can fail a lot of quests just by doing exactly what the quest tells you to instead of using your actual wits. There is a quest for instance where you see some men building a house. One man tells you that they're having trouble building the house because baboons keep stealing all his tools. He thinks maybe they're building something. Outlandish? Yes. But this is typical RPG math right? Go to point a, kill baboons 1-15 and return to point b for reward X. Only it's not your typical RPG. You might notice that this quest seems weird, perhaps even implausible. Or that the men working on the house are all armed. You might dismiss this as typical video game stuff. Turns out they were bandits and when they saw you riding up they pretended to be working. The guy you talked to was being robbed and told you something so stupid he thought nobody that was sane or non-retarded would ever believe it, hoping you'd notice they were armed and would help him. So dead baboons later. Quest failed. The game is full of these moments where you shouldn't make the default "good" or "bad" choice (not that there aren't moral decisions) but the smart one, use your own intelligence and perception and not just follow the guide like an automaton. And I liked that. If I gave you more examples I'd ruin them for you. Sufficed to say this was a good idea and the game deserves some positive recognition for it. they use your learned RPG/video game logic against you. The first time you spot one of these for yourself, go off the rails or just do what you'd expect to do in real life and get "quest complete" it's incredibly rewarding.
Also, the main character sounds like JC Denton. It's not him it turns out, but darned if he isn't doing a heck of an imitation. Also, I liked something Yahtzee pointed out. The armor shop will indeed end you. Once you start buying stuff, you can't stop. It's all so good and you want to match right?
I'm not saying it's a great game. It has it's flaws But it's actually pretty fun imho. You may not agree, but before you judge it crap give it a rental first. Maybe you'll hate it maybe you won't. I rented it because I heard this one was better than the sequel and I walked away with a positive, non-sponsored opinion.
There is one guy who talks like that in the second game. He is in a tavern. The main character makes fun of him.gellert1984 said:
Madara XIII said:
You were saying?
Mystery as to why in the hell they thought it merited a sequel. TW was a huge, festering turd and a criminal waste of money. Horrible, horrible game. It was educational, though, at least for me - it taught me to never, ever, again, make impulse game buys. Or at least promise myself that
I suppose the company has invested too much in their engine or development time, and felt a second whack at this excrement-filled pinata might result in a few nuggets of gold. Or enough money to plague the world (or worlds) with yet another drink coaster, Two Worlds III!
Odd you called it a "Western RPG" - I tend to equate most of those with quality, like many of Bioware's titles. I suppose it is, when compared to JRPG's and the like. Just doesn't sound right. Maybe ERPG would be a better fit, and warning.
What, it sold well? Where, in Germany? Oh, the shame of having contributed to the emergence of a second title.
Yes, still po'd over buying it (TW 1) . [/RANT]
I suppose the company has invested too much in their engine or development time, and felt a second whack at this excrement-filled pinata might result in a few nuggets of gold. Or enough money to plague the world (or worlds) with yet another drink coaster, Two Worlds III!
Odd you called it a "Western RPG" - I tend to equate most of those with quality, like many of Bioware's titles. I suppose it is, when compared to JRPG's and the like. Just doesn't sound right. Maybe ERPG would be a better fit, and warning.
What, it sold well? Where, in Germany? Oh, the shame of having contributed to the emergence of a second title.
Yes, still po'd over buying it (TW 1) . [/RANT]
Soooo...basically...you hated western RPG because despite of the epic scale of what the diddly hoo haa is going on, there is no sense of flow in the storyline, and yet you also hated JRPG because despite of the flow of storyline, everything is skittles and unicorns and singing dancing babies with googly eyes and hair that Don King would go green with envy.
Oh Yahtzee, you poor, poor bastard. Don't worry, a sandbox game worthy of your glee would come along soon enough. >:3
Oh Yahtzee, you poor, poor bastard. Don't worry, a sandbox game worthy of your glee would come along soon enough. >:3
I'm enjoying it so far (on the Xbox, for the record).
The game itself seems not to take itself seriously at all....while it would be nice to have a more coherent plot, the side quests make it all worth it. From murdering someone's aunt so you can sell off her closet full of medicines, to delivering a severed head to a necromancer, to fighting a host of absurd opponents in gladiatorial combat....it's just goofy and fun.
The magic system is good, but you only really get the ability to do anything worthwhile when you level up talented tongue, wisdom, get a bunch of +x willpower modifiers on your equipment, and can actually use a decent staff in the element of your choice. But there is nothing more rewarding than launching five homing poison bolts from an arch necro staff on a settlement full of varn.
The game itself seems not to take itself seriously at all....while it would be nice to have a more coherent plot, the side quests make it all worth it. From murdering someone's aunt so you can sell off her closet full of medicines, to delivering a severed head to a necromancer, to fighting a host of absurd opponents in gladiatorial combat....it's just goofy and fun.
The magic system is good, but you only really get the ability to do anything worthwhile when you level up talented tongue, wisdom, get a bunch of +x willpower modifiers on your equipment, and can actually use a decent staff in the element of your choice. But there is nothing more rewarding than launching five homing poison bolts from an arch necro staff on a settlement full of varn.
Another pleasingly scathing review. while I enjoyed his Mindjack one more, it was still as hilarious.
OT: I was looking in my fridge last week and guess what I found: A jar of BRANSTON PICKLE! When I saw it, I just stood there, shocked for ten seconds.
OT: I was looking in my fridge last week and guess what I found: A jar of BRANSTON PICKLE! When I saw it, I just stood there, shocked for ten seconds.
You should review Magicka! I haven't played more than the beginning of the demo, but it looks entertaining. At the very least, it's non-dark fantasy in which you can light things on fire all over the place.
At the very end, in the credits. The funny thing is that I did read that Cracked article too...Aeshi said:
Amazing review like alway, couldn't stop giggling. Also, I'm glad you read cracked That made my day.
That made my day.
The player in two worlds II, yeah.. I love that! Oh sure your father has been lost and there are nasties about. Oh right yeah I might look into it *yawn*
So good! It gives that game something special
But well mmm a bit middle of road still daring to go that path in this time. At least it is out before Skyrim hit the market!
So good! It gives that game something special
But well mmm a bit middle of road still daring to go that path in this time. At least it is out before Skyrim hit the market!
Woah. You win the grand prize for most ridiculously stretched definition of hipster of all time.daxterx2005 said:
I thought the word had already lost all meaning and value, but you just went and sucked the last little dregs of life out of it right there.
