Zero Punctuation: Velvet Assassin

[peterrflynn]

Really good review. Funny as ever.

Peter

 

[Undyingmarksman]

And right at the end Yahtzee throws in a clever joke about the axis.

 

[Havok985]

Still want to try this game, but then I've always liked stealth games.

 

[andsoitgoes]

Gads, I'm just going bananas. Who is the guy with the hair that he uses all the time, normally to talk about something useless, boring or stupid?

I'm at a loss and I'm dying to know. Please for the help?

 

[Razbunare]

Great stuff i laughed through that whole thing.

 

[Tikicobra]

Am I the only person who didn't laugh at the ending?

 

[Timboman]

Sigh, why is MGS4 the only good stealth game of this generation.

 

[Safe-Keeper]

Sigh, why is MGS4 the only good stealth game of this generation.

It wasn't. It was a bad run-and-gun game of this generation. Stealth games usually involve some degree of hiding.

I know what the answer is going to be - the classic fanboy "but the great thing about this game is you can play it however you want" (Metal Gear Solid Bible, Apologetics chapter 14, verse 9). Sorry, but a Hollywood-style "mow down rows of enemies with a huge arsenal of guns and a rocket launcher" action game is still an action game even if you can choose to hide around. I can choose to race those fast little buggies around in Battlefield 2, I guess that makes BF2 a racing game in your eyes.

 

[Alima]

South Peak - the Uwe Boll of the game studeos?

Yes, I went there!

It's not a bad game, but it is very linear. Also, the story and the telling of it is a bit confusing and muddy at times.

 

[lahanl01]

do you like Dr.Who?

 

[Triple G]

Axis powers making World War 2 games...next thing you know, an Italian gaming company will make a game called "3D Punch Hitler In The Face".

xD

I live in Germany and Yathzee is right. You make one Nazi joke and they all become angry. Once, when I was in 10th grade(after it classes are removed and you proceed university style) and our class wanted to make some "graduation-t-shirts". So I said I want to have "Kraft durch Freude"("Power through delightment", the German vacation-slogan during WWII) and the teacher went mad. It was only a joke.

 

[Pimppeter2]

Haaha, great ending

 

[Anoos]

How are all those posts at the start worth a probation?

 

[Jay Cee]

The very fact that this was developed by South peak was a terrible indication.
This was getting bad scores from even the most positive of reviewers, so I could tell hilarity was coming when the most pessimistic of them all had a stab and the crappy game.

Yahtzee forever

Nice try but it wasn't developed by South Peak.

Anyway, the german government has nothing against people mentioning Nazi. In fact it's the complete opposite. The only thing the german government is careful with is the use of the Swastika. They only allowed to be used in documentary or stuff that is against nazi bullshit, like American History X. They usually censor/change the emblem if it's featured in videogames.

Oh I'm sorry I invaded your pedantic laws.
And I pretty sure I said nothing about the Germans, unless that was out of context...

 

[cutechao999]

Now all we need is a cold war game made by russia.

 

[wolfshrimp]

Actually, when he said the plot was similar to Hitman: Blood Money he meant Hitman: Contracts.

But I'll forgive that little faux pas.

Ach! Du hast mich geNinja'd Escaspister Schwein!

I personally would like to see a British-developed WWII game, if we must have any more of the damn things, where the British Army is depicted to hold more than Cockneys who use the the word 'bloody' in every sentence, red-haired Glaswegians who have nothing better to say than 'aye', and jolly old Captain Price types of the 55th Generic Officer Regiment. If we're going to continue running WWII titles into the ground let's have some diversity!

I read somewhere that Velvet Assassin had little clues that linked in to the real world. Read it in PCGamer (UK) something about some guys finding a stash of money and some gold bars which they were then allowed to keep! Uh yeah here's one story: http://www.planetxbox360.com/article_4417/Viral_Marketing_-_More_Velvet_Assassin_Gold_Found_in_UK

Funny neither the wiki page or Yahtzee mentions it

 

[NoodleWoman]

All the Nazi killing in games lately is starting to drive me mad.

 

[Taojin]

I laughed out loud, very loud when I heard the last bit Yahtzee said "What is this, community service?". LOL! Very funny episode (makes up for me looking up that baby syndrome he mentioned in the "credits" in the previous Valkyria one, ...uff still got nightmares)

 

[Vic Sage]

Good video, i have to say that i was never under the impression that Velvet Assassin would be a second rate version of both Hitman and Thief, and i was proved correct, which continues to show that people in the games industry are refusing to come up with new ideas and instead are using recycled mechanics from old games, though i am looking forward to what, if Yahtzee does review it, Yahtzee has to say about Prototype

 

[fasteddie_felson]

don't want you to get too big a head, but that is a funny review.