Zombies, what is your human plan!

sarethed

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Oct 1, 2010
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I would pretend to be a vampire to attract extreme Twi-tards... yum, 13-year-old female braaaaaaaaaiiinnnnnnssss...
 

FalloutJack

Bah weep grah nah neep ninny bom
Nov 20, 2008
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I am loving the answers I'm getting here.

For the record, my plan is...to start running. That's right, running. Humans will FREAK as soon as zombies start moving FAST. It'll go from "Oh crap!" to "OH SHIIIT!!!" in five seconds.
 

Daniel_Rosamilia

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Jan 17, 2008
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Wait until I mutate the power to turn invisible/camouflage, then stalk a group and pick off any stragglers.
If that doesn't work, then charge in with a horde and hope I don't get my face shot off.
 

Ironrose

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Nov 18, 2009
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I find this thread quite prophetic since I was watching 28 days Later last night.

OT: follow the noise and the lights, also cut off all access to boats. (my theory is that the safest place to be during a zombie apocalypse would be on a boat.)
 

Flackster

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Feb 21, 2010
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I'd just camp the "off campus" liquor store. Silly collage kids, your fake I.D. wont save your brains from me! =D
 

Cain_Zeros

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Nov 13, 2009
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Stick near the back of the horde and let the humans waste their ammo and energy killing the others. Then, om nom nom.
 

Manicotti

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Apr 10, 2009
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There are always lots of random corpses lying around during the apocalypse, we can just have a bunch of us play dead [footnote]pun intendead[/footnote] around doorways of supply depots and such.
 

higgs20

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Feb 16, 2010
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go for, in this order: the black one, the funny one, the ones that had sex and the fat one who whimpers a lot and never does anything useful. they are the easiest targets, it's fact.

oh and avoid the action hero and his "when we get out of here" girl friend. but if they just have to be taken out go for the girl, the guy will probably sacrifice himself to help her, and then she'll ride off into the sunset, leaving us to hallow out her buddies skulls. again all fact.
 

AcidMittens

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Jan 29, 2011
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Sit in a pub wearing a yop hat and monocle waiting for a person to enter, make them think I'm human and when they feel their safest I would eat them.
 

Cpu46

Gloria ex machina
Sep 21, 2009
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1. Find the genre savvy one
2. Do something completely out of the ordinary to catch him off guard.
3. Devour genre savvy one
4. ????
5. Brains?
 

sycoesis

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May 31, 2010
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be strapped into a car and honk horn accidentally while trying to reach fleeing humans then breaking window chaseing chipmunks up trees
 

IceStar100

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Jan 5, 2009
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viranimus said:
Sounds like someone has been playing Stubbs the Zombie

Wait.. im not the only person on the planet to have played that, right?
Nope

oh I plan to dance.
 

Nouw

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Mar 18, 2009
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Dango said:
Befriend them, you know, get on there good side, I'm sure that humans and zombies could coexist.
Shaun of the Dead agrees!

My plan is to be friendly and then BRAINS! MOAR BRAINS!!!
 

Srs bzns

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Feb 4, 2011
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Try and negotiate a compromise, maybe only eat the brains of douchebags.

Oh, wait...
 

Klopy

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Nov 30, 2009
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The more famous zombies aren't intelligent, but there are some more smart ones. If I somehow retain my ability to think and lose my morals, or I get something out of killing people, I'd probably rally zombies to attack en masse, pretty much everything. Targets would be high traffic areas to start, hands down. Then, I would have to decide between trying to catch the military off guard, or bolster my forces in an attempt to out-man them.

I would start big and then organize a search to start looking for survivors. Reading the Zombie survival guide would give me ideas of what I'd be up against.
 

higgs20

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Feb 16, 2010
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Azrael the Cat said:
Nothing beats the zombie tactics in Return of the Living Dead (the 80s tribute to NotD, NOT actually part of the famous Romero series):
(1) Morgue-workers worried about the fact that the gas they've released seems to be turning them into zombies, calls 911 for an ambulance.
(2) Paramedics arive, explain to the morgue workers that they're dead.
(3) Newly formed zombies eat the paramedics.
(4) Zombies phone 911: 'We need more paramedics!!'

They do the same thing later in the film when the cops arrive and get eaten (i.e. get on the police radio asking for backup).
watching it now, haha.
 

theonlyblaze2

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Aug 20, 2010
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viranimus said:
Sounds like someone has been playing Stubbs the Zombie

Wait.. im not the only person on the planet to have played that, right?
Of course you are, you dirty zombie! Now, I will defeat you zombie monsters with...DANCE!!
 

RetroViruses

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Aug 7, 2008
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Sing RE: Your Brains, over and over on repeat until they finally see my logic and leave their protection.