A Fanboy's Guide to Fanboying
- Thread starter Shamus Young
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At first, I thought this was serious.
Thought it was a little crazy, but serious. Lol
No one is safe from the fan boys. Not even the fanboys of games that I just made up.
Thought it was a little crazy, but serious. Lol
What did you say about my absolute favorite game of all time Final Metal Halo: A Link to the Sequel 26, that just came out on the Sontendosoft PSBox 4-720ii? I'll have you know you're a hack! You've obviously never played it and shouldn't be allowed to say bad things about it! And just because people mysteriously come back to life after being killed by marauding Darth Teddy Space Marines with absolutely no explanation, doesn't make it bad writing. You're just too thick skulled to understand the subtleties of the experience. And just because it you have to evade every enemy in the game, because you start with a toothpick and they all have 10,000,000 Hp, does not mean the game is bad. Nor is the multiplayer broken when you start with a slingshot and everyone else has BFG 9000's. You obviously just suck at multiplayer! Practice you noob!Onyx Oblivion said:
No one is safe from the fan boys. Not even the fanboys of games that I just made up.
Can I get a certificate saying I completed this course? I figure it'll look good on my CV. I can then brag about being a certified Fanboy! For the scientifically inclined:
I've actually seen all of these while I was on Metacritic this morning. I was looking up reviews for MMetroid.
I feel like a lot of these contradict some of the stuff that Yahtzee does when he reviews a game. 
Anyone else notice that by chance?
Anyone else notice that by chance?
Onyx Oblivion said:
Not at all.
Think of a game series you like... Now think of your favourite title from that series. Got it? Good. There are fans of this very same series who will consider you a monster and a mental aberration for liking that particular title instead of another one from the same series, ready to vomit out paragraphs detailing why you are both wrong and EVIL and probably a poser who came late to the series or an old timer who refuses to accept the new directions of the series. You're worse to them than people who don't like the series at all, like some parasitic worm attached to their favourite thing... unless their favourite thing is a parasitic worm in which case feel free to supply your own metaphor.
Bah! TLDNR.
The secret to proper fanboyism is none of those things: it is incandescent incoherent rage. Period. This not about showing the idiot that his/her opinion is wrong, this is about showing the Interwebs that the idiot is worthy of eternal horrific torture for daring to have an opinion at all. This is best accomplished through carefully misspelled words and typographical errors - research shows that the average forum reader spends more time reading these posts, and is thus obviously paying more attention to them - and through the prolific reference to sex, which kindles interest by association with the unknown, and rage... again, mostly by reminding the reader that they have, in fact, never had any. It also helps to maintain almost toxicly high levels of self-loathing while writing the post; childs play for the true fanboy. But those are merely ways of expressing the rage in text; its the rage itself that is important. Logic of any flavor need not apply, much the less rules.
The secret to proper fanboyism is none of those things: it is incandescent incoherent rage. Period. This not about showing the idiot that his/her opinion is wrong, this is about showing the Interwebs that the idiot is worthy of eternal horrific torture for daring to have an opinion at all. This is best accomplished through carefully misspelled words and typographical errors - research shows that the average forum reader spends more time reading these posts, and is thus obviously paying more attention to them - and through the prolific reference to sex, which kindles interest by association with the unknown, and rage... again, mostly by reminding the reader that they have, in fact, never had any. It also helps to maintain almost toxicly high levels of self-loathing while writing the post; childs play for the true fanboy. But those are merely ways of expressing the rage in text; its the rage itself that is important. Logic of any flavor need not apply, much the less rules.
Not at all. Just goes to show great minds think alike.Straying Bullet said:Seriously, didn't notice man. Sorry if you feel ripped. =3The_root_of_all_evil said:Which is why I posted it on the second commentStraying Bullet said:
I was wondering whether or not you were serious until about the second page. Good job, sir!Shamus Young said:
Hah, almost got me. Read the first page and was thinking over an argument in my head. Read the second page and had a good laugh.
Lovely! I was a couple paragraphs in thinking you'd lost your mind before I realized what was going on here....very subtle and well-played!
I hope you have a follow-up article for that curious reversal, the fan hater, and how he can get the most out of his poignant, scathing critiques to send the teeming masses in to a frothing boil...!
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FanHater?from=Main.FanHaters
(Yes, technically it would be the same article with a very slight change of context....)
I hope you have a follow-up article for that curious reversal, the fan hater, and how he can get the most out of his poignant, scathing critiques to send the teeming masses in to a frothing boil...!
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FanHater?from=Main.FanHaters
(Yes, technically it would be the same article with a very slight change of context....)
I almost missed the satire (sad to say), but then I hit the end of the article. Well played, Shamus. Well played.
I get that this is supposed to be a joke, but I legitimately agree with some of the points, such as you can't judge a game until you've played it.
I think a fair ground rule should be that you can't fault a game for being what it is trying to be. If you know a game is unrealistic, you can't fault it for that because it was trying to be that way. Same with the graphics. It's not fair to use what is supposed to be an integral part of the game as a complaint, unless they failed at making said part good. If it I'd done poorly, that's a fault that can be criticized.
I think a fair ground rule should be that you can't fault a game for being what it is trying to be. If you know a game is unrealistic, you can't fault it for that because it was trying to be that way. Same with the graphics. It's not fair to use what is supposed to be an integral part of the game as a complaint, unless they failed at making said part good. If it I'd done poorly, that's a fault that can be criticized.