A Fanboy's Guide to Fanboying

[RelexCryo]

Experienced Points: A Fanboy's Guide to Fanboying

Follow these few simple rules to avoid the wrath of the fanboy.

Read Full Article

Hate to dissagree with you Shamus, but your satier was off on the first two points.

1)You're not allowed to review games you know you won't like.

Why review a game if it's not for you? If you're not going to like a game, then don't play it. Leave the reviews to the true fans.

You're not allowed to have an opinion on a game until you've played it.

2)It's unfair to judge a game before it comes out, or to decide you don't want to get a game when you haven't tried it. For a reviewer, this is incredibly unprofessional. Reviewers that do this are just attention-starved hacks.

Nobody should say anything negative about a game until they've played it themselves and have formed an opinion. Until then, they should only be allowed to say nice things.


Both of those 2 attempts at satire are wrong.

1) I have seen people give games negative reviews(or at least deduct points on a review) simply because of conventions that are inherent to the genre/sub-genre. For example, I have seen people complain that you become too powerful and the game loses challenge in Role Playing games like Jade Empire where becoming an extremely powerful badass(greatest Martial Artist in the World in Jade Empire's case.) and curbstomping everything endgame is a significant part of the games appeal. Some people don't like that sub-genre of roleplaying game, and they will actually give negative reviews simply because a game is part of that genre- even though this is pretty much the only way to effectively roleplay as someone like Musashi. Many people believe that games *must* become more difficult as time goes by, and will give negative reviews if a game actually becomes less difficult endgame, when you are a maxed out insanely powerful badass. Building up to becoming the most powerful badass in the world is a legitimate sub-genre of roleplaying games, but many people will give negative reviews simply because a game is part of that sub-genre.

2) Reviewing a game you haven't played is unprofessional. Deal with it.

That said, I love your stuff in general Shamus.

 

[hyperhammy]

I think this explains it all. Hilarious shit.

You have been ninja'd! ON DA INTERWEBZ!

 

[sylekage]

All of those points have some truth in them, even though it was almost pure sarcasm throughout . Good article though, funny stuff.

 

[chozo_hybrid]

My sarcasm detector is going off the charts!

A sarcasm detector... What a useful invention. cookie for reference

Thank you, I haven't had a cookie in ages. I tried to find the youtube clip, but it was only in German for some reason...

Still, this article is awesome XD

 

[Mr Companion]

Let's keep a running count of how many people completely miss the satire.

The count is at: 1

Yeah I bet you are gonna get a lot of that for this. Because as clever as most people on the escapist are there is always a select few who just don't understand good humour. See those who misunderstood the Duke Nukem zp review.

 

[Zukhramm]

1) I have seen people give games negative reviews(or at least deduct points on a review) simply because of conventions that are inherent to the genre/sub-genre. For example, I have seen people complain that you become too powerful and the game loses challenge in Role Playing games like Jade Empire where becoming an extremely powerful badass(greatest Martial Artist in the World in Jade Empire's case.) and curbstomping everything endgame is a significant part of the games appeal. Some people don't like that sub-genre of roleplaying game, and they will actually give negative reviews simply because a game is part of that genre- even though this is pretty much the only way to effectively roleplay as someone like Musashi. Many people believe that games *must* become more difficult as time goes by, and will give negative reviews if a game actually becomes less difficult endgame, when you are a maxed out insanely powerful badass. Building up to becoming the most powerful badass in the world is a legitimate sub-genre of roleplaying games, but many people will give negative reviews simply because a game is part of that sub-genre.

How would someone know the game is of this "get very strong sub-genre" before playing it? In the end, if that is something the review does not like, is not the point of a review to point out what you like and dislike about the game?

2) Reviewing a game you haven't played is unprofessional. Deal with it.

But he didn't say "You're not allowed to review a game until you've played it.", but rather "You're not allowed to have an opinion on a game until you've played it.".

 

[Chrinik]

Fun how many people missed the point entirely XD
Although some points sound like valid arguements. Afterall, the best satirist has knowledge in the specific field so he can mock it more.

BUT, I have my own thought about fanboyism...
/ignore...

I just ignore most fanboy hate...I watch reviews of a game I might like, I read reviews, maybe download the demo and play for a bit.
But I judge a game by how much it entertained me through story, gameplay or the little picture on the box (XD) by my PERSONAL Standarts...not some made up standarts chart everything has to be measured with...
I liked the Halo series, and I´d probably get Reach, altho I had XLB Gold for about 3 months before turning back to SP or offline MP entirely.
I liked the CoD Games.
I liked Kane and Lynch, both parts.
Etc etc etc...
And I´m not going to dictate my opinion, I´m not going to make shallow points or whatever to claim these games be "BESTEST GAMES EVAR!!!"

But what I absolutely don´t like is when the "haters" go about hating and rambling about a certain plothole that has been explained in like the first few minutes, or the game before, and they just didn´t get it because they skip cutscenes with bathroombreaks or skipped the game entirely, whatever<.<
I don´t watch a serries mid season and complain about how I don´t know what the fuck is going on<.<

But afterall, both sides are massive Nerds...

 

[Cherry Cola]

Experienced Points: A Fanboy's Guide to Fanboying

Follow these few simple rules to avoid the wrath of the fanboy.

Read Full Article

Hate to dissagree with you Shamus, but your satier was off on the first two points.

1)You're not allowed to review games you know you won't like.

Why review a game if it's not for you? If you're not going to like a game, then don't play it. Leave the reviews to the true fans.

You're not allowed to have an opinion on a game until you've played it.

2)It's unfair to judge a game before it comes out, or to decide you don't want to get a game when you haven't tried it. For a reviewer, this is incredibly unprofessional. Reviewers that do this are just attention-starved hacks.

Nobody should say anything negative about a game until they've played it themselves and have formed an opinion. Until then, they should only be allowed to say nice things.


Both of those 2 attempts at satire are wrong.

1) I have seen people give games negative reviews(or at least deduct points on a review) simply because of conventions that are inherent to the genre/sub-genre. For example, I have seen people complain that you become too powerful and the game loses challenge in Role Playing games like Jade Empire where becoming an extremely powerful badass(greatest Martial Artist in the World in Jade Empire's case.) and curbstomping everything endgame is a significant part of the games appeal. Some people don't like that sub-genre of roleplaying game, and they will actually give negative reviews simply because a game is part of that genre- even though this is pretty much the only way to effectively roleplay as someone like Musashi. Many people believe that games *must* become more difficult as time goes by, and will give negative reviews if a game actually becomes less difficult endgame, when you are a maxed out insanely powerful badass. Building up to becoming the most powerful badass in the world is a legitimate sub-genre of roleplaying games, but many people will give negative reviews simply because a game is part of that sub-genre.

Many people will give negative reviews because it's a bad sub-genre.

If a game stops being challenging by the end, then it severely undermines the climax, and ruins much of the experience. Talk about how it's a legitimate sub-genre all you want, it doesn't mean it's a good sub-genre or that the game is free from criticism.

Besides, you need to criticize the sub-genre anyway, because people reading should be able to understand why you don't think that sub-genre works. It's professional to criticize a game for being part of a sub-genre you don't like if you explain why it doesn't work in the game and how it makes the game worse. Fanboys ignore that and simply argue that the game isn't your cup of tea. That is the point Shamus is making, and it's a real, legitimate point.

2) Reviewing a game you haven't played is unprofessional. Deal with it.

He never said "reviewing" a game if you haven't played it. He said judging a game.

A reviewer is fully capable of judging a game before he's played it. Yahtzee did it to Starcraft 2 when he explained why he didn't want to play it. Like it or not, reviewers have opinions too (their entire job is about expressing their opinions after all), and if they don't want to play a game, it's in no way unprofessional.

To quote George Orwell from his "In Defence of the Novel": "there can be no such thing as good novel criticism so long as it is assumed that every novel is worth reviewing." This statement works just as well with games as it does with novels.

 

[Swaki]

I agree on 2 of the points you made in your oh so witty ways, It's not fair to criticize a multiplayer game if the community is horrible. sure i have been called terrible names in every multiplayer game i have ever played, something that made my experience less enjoyable, but it didn't make the game worse, and you shouldn't criticize a game before it gets out, heck i have even had fun with a rebellion game.

 

[Ashsaver]

"You're not allowed to criticize a game unless you've played the entire series."

I have to lol at this thinking there are bazillion of Pokemon games out there, One must wonder how many Pokemon fans are actually allowed to criticize Pokemon.

 

[Cgull]

It's a little concerning that some people have missed the satrical entirely.

Still, 'twas a funny, and worryingly accurate, article either way.

 

[C95J]

This, is the best article ever.

 

[Inco]

Haha... That had me laughing.
Satirical.
Easily.

The main message here is "don't bother arguing with the fan boy, as it's pointless" if you missed it.

 

[Kollega]

I haven't laughed, but that's probably because it's cold here.

Rule #1: do not talk about Fight Club you're not allowed to review games you know you won't like.

If you are a proper reviewer (as opposed to a professional troll), why would you even touch a game that you know you won't like? The only reason i can think of is to preach about *insert a particular genre's problem here* and how it's ruining the entire genre - but that's not too reviewer-like, now is it? Well, unless you specifically intend and label it as a genre criticisms.

Above all, to be a fanboy (or girl, we're elitist not sexist)...

The future is here, ladies and gentlemen. Hooray for equality!

 

[roekenny]

Only ever had one heated argument on-line with people been civil as what was better air-soft or paint-ball 10 people either side bickering pros and cons for about a week and 8 pages and all we ended was all agreeing to disagree and admit combining the two would be awesome. Still give me hope that such rabid fanboyism of two rivals can come to a happy conclusion.
Ironic however if were all face to face would been a very heated fight with plenty of trash talking and bruises the day after and of settled the argument with a clear victor and to the losers goes the first 3 rounds at pub.

 

[Mordwyl]

Straight from point one you can immediately tell this is satirical.

 

[megs1120]

I hate to sould like one of those people, but I have to take issue with You're not allowed to review games you know you won't like. People look for varying things out of games and different genres have different experiences to offer.

I don't like rythm games. In fact, I hate them. If I were told to review Guitar Hero or DDR, I'd give them bad reviews. It would be wrong for me to review them because I don't enjoy what fans of the genre would find fun and rewarding. Likewise, Adam Sessler hates JRPGs, so he generally doesn't get the task of reviewing them. Even if it was the greatest JRPG ever made, it would never click and provide an entertaining experience for him.

Authors really do matter, especially since entertainment can't be judged objectively. There is no accounting for taste.

 

[Dhatz]

nononono! Fans, haters and people inert to the game! you just grossly underestimated the value of a review.

 

[TheDoctor455]

So, you can't judge a game!

Got it!

I am now safe from fanboys.

Right?

Probably not.

Incidentally.... this article... did someone get into an argument with Yahtzee?