Anybody find sex overrated?

[Neurotic Void Melody]

... Though I do think that western culture's constant fascination with sex could potentially be annoying to people who don't give a shit about it.

I would put that down to the advertisement industry using sex to appeal to the lowest common denominators for profit. The fickle masses lap it up without a second's thought. Same as the mainstream music industry; they sell sex to the teenagers in the guise of modern music. It is where the moolah is, after all. Hormonal teenagers are cash cows for the "hotties." It annoys me, but what can you do when the market is always going to be there?

 

[lastcigarette]

I t depends on who it is with. If it's sex with me it's probably awesome.

 

[Queen Michael]

Yeah, it's honestly not that great to have sex. It's fun, but there are lots of things better.

 

[Something Amyss]

Sex with condoms is over-rated for sure. Anyone who pretends to genuinely enjoy sex with a latex dick glove stopping all of the sensation is just a liar.

I genuinely enjoy sex with condoms.

I t depends on who it is with. If it's sex with me it's probably awesome.

I'm inclined to agree, but only on the provision that you are really David Bowie.

 

[camazotz]

People have variable sex drives, and it probably has to do with your biochemistry, age in life, degree of experience and interest (I can safely say my interest has never subsided, even if age has tempered me a bit), and numerous other life factors.

I'll point out one thing, anecdotally: I had a number of partners from around age 17-23 but I did actually not have a transcendental sort of "aha I get what this is all about" experience until 1993; and the gal in question is someone I'll never forget as a result (ironically she told me I wouldn't forget her, either...and she was right, she wasn't just conceited). It took me until 2006 with my third and final wife (yep) to run into another woman who was both generally wonderful and interesting and also sexually as amazing as that age 23 event (which took place in 1993)....so in some ways, having that "moment" when sex suddenly seems more significant than you ever imagined can be almost as bad (almost) as never hitting that moment and wondering what all the fuss is about. The latter is probably more tolerable, at least.....if you don't know what you're missing then you have nothing to fret about. But of course this all relates to the old adage of "better to have loved and lost then never have loved at all."

Either way, it's important to still remember that sex in society today is a selling mechanism and a tool to make us behave the way marketers want. It's still principally something we are engineered to do for procreation and bonding, a process defined by the need to propogate our genes....and only in the last 150 or so years have we been able to treat it purely as a recreational event.

 

[Callate]

Actually, I tend to think sex is pretty damn important for most long-term romantic relationships. Your experience may vary, of course, but this isn't the Emperor's New Clothes, here. No one is making this out to be more than it is; it is that important to most people.

And when it's good, it's awesome.

 

[Something Amyss]

I'm inclined to agree, but only on the provision that you are really David Bowie.

Man, I thought that was Edward Scissorhands. Danger-sex!

It'd be worth it to have sex with vintage Johnny Depp.

 

[CellShaded]

Nope, not overrated at all. Of course, if you're in a relationship that's gone on for a long, long time, it kind of loses it's appeal. But nothing a bit of mixing it up won't fix. Pretty sure that's already been said somewhere above.

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

Can you really describe yourself as asexual if you have any interest in sex (or making love), sorry but it's something that really bugs me. If you are asexual, you have NO interest in sex whatsoever. No ifs, buts, passing interests, right conditions or coconuts. Any conditionals attached to the very black and white statement of "I'm asexual" completely invalidate the statement.

Asexuality means "No sexual attraction" It's not necessarily a lack of interest, though it can manifest as such due to no sexual attraction. That doesn't mean that asexuals can't/won't have sex as there are many other reasons to do so despite a lack of sexual attraction.

If an asexual is in a mixed orientation relationship (such as myself), they may wish to have sex because it's important to their partner or they want to have children. There's also a matter of just sheer curiosity and society saying you need to have sex to be happy, ext ext.

If you have a difficult time understanding how asexuals can possibly have sex with an orientation that means "no sexual attraction to anyone" remember that it's not impossible for a person to physically have sex outside of their orientation. Lesbians can physically have sex with men for example, it's just the thought of doing so doesn't typically occur because lesbians have no sexual attraction to men.


Edit: As far as "making love" is concerned, that depends on how you define "making love". Making love expresses shared intimacy, which is often, but not always connected to intercourse. Sex without love can exist and so can love without sex. Even if making love does involve intercourse[footnote]There is more to sex than just intercourse[/footnote], the emphasis is still on the shared intimacy and not so much the act of intercourse. Asexuals do often desire companionship and being close to those they love just like anyone else.

Edit 2: I say that I can't have sex without love because I do have absolutely no interest in sex, I can literally go my whole life without having sex and it wouldn't bother me at all, but if I'm in love, I want my partner to be happy and if having sex with them will make them happy, well I guess I'm having sex. I realize that it's a connection many people want to share, which loops back to why "making love" is acceptable when just "intercourse" may not be. Love is the driving force, not the sex.

 

[BadNewDingus]

I would say that, but only because of the people involved. If I was doing it with models, I'm sure sex wouldn't be soo over-rated.

 

[awesomeClaw]

I would say that, but only because of the people involved. If I was doing it with models, I'm sure sex wouldn't be soo over-rated.

This got me thinking.

Imagine there are people you find very attractive. Now imagine you will not be sleeping with them anytime soon (shouldn't be too hard)

If we assume the above is true, that sex actually is significantly better when you are doing it with people you find very attractive. That means there exists astounding pleasures, which you have little chance of ever experiencing.

Now that's a chilling thought.

OT: Virgin, wouldn't know.

 

[zinho73]

Nope, not overrated at all. Of course, if you're in a relationship that's gone on for a long, long time, it kind of loses it's appeal. But nothing a bit of mixing it up won't fix. Pretty sure that's already been said somewhere above.

25 years on a relationship and still going strong;

I do think some people have a low sex drive and it is normal. Although, if it is too low, a hormonal check can't hurt.
Well, I really like it. Sometimes I am too tired or worried about other things, so I am not up to it. But on normal circumstances it is a killer way to end the day.

I also do not see it replacing other fun activities, like gaming, sports and so on, normally you can find a place to do it in your daily routine - unless it is a romantic trip and you kind of go at it all day, but this is also an unusual thing.

In the end it relaxes me and makes me feel very close to my wife - and when younger was incredible fun in casual encounters.

 

[zinho73]

I would say that, but only because of the people involved. If I was doing it with models, I'm sure sex wouldn't be soo over-rated.

Models can be overrated too.

Some of the best sex I had came from people that enjoyed themselves - some were very pretty, some not so much, but when a woman has confidence and give herself to the experience it was always a great thing.

(I can only talk about my own experience here, so in that case, only women).

 

[zinho73]

I would say that, but only because of the people involved. If I was doing it with models, I'm sure sex wouldn't be soo over-rated.

This got me thinking.

Imagine there are people you find very attractive. Now imagine you will not be sleeping with them anytime soon (shouldn't be too hard)

If we assume the above is true, that sex actually is significantly better when you are doing it with people you find very attractive. That means there exists astounding pleasures, which you have little chance of ever experiencing.

Now that's a chilling thought.

OT: Virgin, wouldn't know.

It is very possible to have sex with people that you find very attractive. Take care of yourself and find a way to build your confidence. Besides that, don't put much thought into it and live your live - The astounding pleasures can happen.

To me, great sex is a byproduct of happiness.