I used to like children, but now that I have serious health problems that aren't readily apparently upon meeting me, I generally avoid them. You can't explain to a kid "no, really I have X, Y, and Z invisible problems" and expect them to achieve any sort of understanding of what you mean by that. The end result is that they get confused when you're not like other adults, and it doesn't go well.
However, even when I still liked being around kids, I came to the conclusion that I didn't want any myself. I mentioned this to my ex once, and he had the most startling response: he said that it would be a shame if I was never a mother. I was rather put off by this idea -- that I should be a mother simply *because*. Never mind taking into account the circumstances under which I would undertake this journey, or with whom, or whether it was a good idea, or whether I *wanted to do it*. Or anything reasonable like that.
I think that my ex's reaction is in part a reflection of society as a whole's stance on parenthood -- that not achieving it is somehow a failure, and achieving it is somehow a good thing in and of itself. I'm all for parenthood in general, but I've seen too many fucked up families to believe that everyone should have children.
Anyway, no, it is not weird or wrong in any way to not like children or pregnancy, and anyone who tells you otherwise needs to expand their worldview and stop being a jerk.
It is a little odd that you don't like the idea of someone getting pregnant, though. If it's their choice, and they've made that choice in good circumstances with support and care and are ready as is possible for the consequences of their choice, then their suffering (because yes, pregnancy and childcare involve a lot of suffering) will one day yield a new adult in the world, and that can be a wonderful thing.
But, so long as it's just a private aversion sort of thing, as opposed to you turning into one of those people who think the human race should stop breeding and purposefully die out, then I wouldn't worry about it (or let others get you down about it). Sometimes people make a sacrifice for a cause they care about, and sometimes that cause is children.
To make a comparison: I'd never want to walk into a plague zone and dedicate months or years to treating sufferers, not least because I'd be risking my health or even my life to do it. I wouldn't want anyone to go through that, full stop. BUT, the end results are largely positive and the world is a better place if someone does make that sacrifice and spend time treating people in a plague zone. It'd be a good thing they did, just not a thing everyone's called to do. Now, pregnancy and childbirth aren't exactly a doctor walking into a plague zone, but like the plague zone thing, they can use someone's sacrifices to make the world a better place.
However, even when I still liked being around kids, I came to the conclusion that I didn't want any myself. I mentioned this to my ex once, and he had the most startling response: he said that it would be a shame if I was never a mother. I was rather put off by this idea -- that I should be a mother simply *because*. Never mind taking into account the circumstances under which I would undertake this journey, or with whom, or whether it was a good idea, or whether I *wanted to do it*. Or anything reasonable like that.
I think that my ex's reaction is in part a reflection of society as a whole's stance on parenthood -- that not achieving it is somehow a failure, and achieving it is somehow a good thing in and of itself. I'm all for parenthood in general, but I've seen too many fucked up families to believe that everyone should have children.
Anyway, no, it is not weird or wrong in any way to not like children or pregnancy, and anyone who tells you otherwise needs to expand their worldview and stop being a jerk.
It is a little odd that you don't like the idea of someone getting pregnant, though. If it's their choice, and they've made that choice in good circumstances with support and care and are ready as is possible for the consequences of their choice, then their suffering (because yes, pregnancy and childcare involve a lot of suffering) will one day yield a new adult in the world, and that can be a wonderful thing.
But, so long as it's just a private aversion sort of thing, as opposed to you turning into one of those people who think the human race should stop breeding and purposefully die out, then I wouldn't worry about it (or let others get you down about it). Sometimes people make a sacrifice for a cause they care about, and sometimes that cause is children.
To make a comparison: I'd never want to walk into a plague zone and dedicate months or years to treating sufferers, not least because I'd be risking my health or even my life to do it. I wouldn't want anyone to go through that, full stop. BUT, the end results are largely positive and the world is a better place if someone does make that sacrifice and spend time treating people in a plague zone. It'd be a good thing they did, just not a thing everyone's called to do. Now, pregnancy and childbirth aren't exactly a doctor walking into a plague zone, but like the plague zone thing, they can use someone's sacrifices to make the world a better place.
. I guess this is the forums for people who hate humanity and everything it brings to the world.