Escapist's Day Jobs

[DoPo]

Me, well, some of this

Software Developer for a company that makes O/G Financial Software;

though it's just financial, not tied to oil and gas. But mostly this

Officially I'm classed as a Web Developer (at least thats my job title) but I work solely in the backend which means I'm more of a regular software developer than an actual web dev (meaning I can change the area I work in fairly easily, which is something that appeals to me).

though my job title isn't Web Developer, even though that's most of what I've done for the past few months.

I specialize in MVC, C#, SQL, Javascript, JQuery, Knockoutjs, Windows Services, and soon vNext when it actually gets released.

Yeah, similar but swap the Microsoft products for Java.

It says Software Engineer on my contract I've not written that much Java for a while for the simple reason that there wasn't as much to do on that side of the application, so I've been spending a lot of the time on the UI end.

One of them literally uses a garden rake to collect all his money together because his arms just aren't long enough.

I hate you, why do you have to keep bringing this up and making fun of me

Spoiler: You made me cry

 

[Beffudled Sheep_v1legacy]

Hey, at least the police don't have to arrive to turf out your customers! ...Hopefully.

The last place I worked in was like that. Oh yeah, plus parents would always turn around to scream at their children from across the room instead of walking over because it's Scotland god damn it and they're fucked if they're going to cross the entire room if they don't have to by Christ!

No they do that to.

Get tonnes of fat glaswegians here on holiday to. All sorts of tourists and locals, all of them generally rather horrid.

No just anything that isn't retail. Retail is god awful. Especially food retail.

I've had the flu 4 times this year because customers are fuckign disgusting mouth breathers that sneeze and cough everywhere.

Oh God yes they are. My customers frequently hand me their credit/debit cards after holding them in their mouths and they always give it to me mouth end to hand.
Yuck.

Sheep, you are the American fuckin' dream personified. You...*sniff*...Gods damn it, you make me proud!

Not sure if sarcasm...
Hey, I can make some pretty okay money with some nice health benefits, stock options, and retirement options while doing pretty minimal work.
It may not be ambitious but it will allow me to care for myself and the family I plan on having and I'll be able to spend time with them since I won't be overstressed or overworked.
Its not what I want to do either and I'll have to do some real hard work for crap pay till I get there but I think I'll be content enough in the position and that the benefits and pay will be worth it.

They are disgusting creatures, they hand me notes out of their mouths a lot and it's revolting, I mean money is already filthy why add to it? Why would you put that in your mouth!?.

And another bloody thing; why do they fucking fold it up, is it so I have to fuck about unfolding it to put it in the till and flatten it for the banking at the end of the day?

Grr.

Folded is a lot better than some of the money I get. I frequently get money thats so damn crumpled and rippled that the electronic safes we have to put the money in doesn't believe the bills are real legal tender and reject them!
So damn annoying. I just wanna say "bro, buy a goddamn wallet or something! Shit."

No I get that too it's just less frequent. Also see; people pulling change and buttons and tissues and cthulus nipple clamps out of their pocket, chucking it all over my damn counter and wondering why I'm agitated with them. BUY A FUCKING WALLET. Fuck.

We should do an angry young retail worker show or something. Get @Dark Knifer: in on it.

Thankfully I don't have a counter that they can ruin with their pocket crap.
That sounds cathartic. We should set some asshole customers on fire.
For science.

 

[TechNoFear]

I am a SME (Subject Matter Expert) / Snr Software Engineer / Technical Lead / Solution Architect but my job title is 'Senior Consultant'.

I design IT and OT solutions for mining, law enforcement and financials.

 

[dandahammer]

Assistant Manager at Wal-mart. Started hourly in 2003 while going to college and decided to do the salaried life there starting in 2008.

 

[Aarun]

Currently I'm sat being a drain on British society. I'm a second year undergraduate History student with no plans for the future following my degree, except that I don't particularly want to go into anything related to History or the Heritage industry.

During the summer I work at a local family run confectionery factory, where I help make and pack biscuits, jams, fudge and man the front sweet shop during the school-kid rush. The pay isn't anything amazing, but it sustains me over the summer and lets me save up for other things as well, so I can't complain really. Another plus of the job is that I get plenty of free fudge, jam, sweets, biscuits, etc. to take and give to friends and family.

 

[Synthetica]

I'm a high school student, so that's where most of my time goes. I also have a job as a stock clerk, and as a paperboy (both about +/- 2 hours per week atm)

 

[The White Hunter]

Hey, at least the police don't have to arrive to turf out your customers! ...Hopefully.

The last place I worked in was like that. Oh yeah, plus parents would always turn around to scream at their children from across the room instead of walking over because it's Scotland god damn it and they're fucked if they're going to cross the entire room if they don't have to by Christ!

No they do that to.

Get tonnes of fat glaswegians here on holiday to. All sorts of tourists and locals, all of them generally rather horrid.

No just anything that isn't retail. Retail is god awful. Especially food retail.

I've had the flu 4 times this year because customers are fuckign disgusting mouth breathers that sneeze and cough everywhere.

Oh God yes they are. My customers frequently hand me their credit/debit cards after holding them in their mouths and they always give it to me mouth end to hand.
Yuck.

Sheep, you are the American fuckin' dream personified. You...*sniff*...Gods damn it, you make me proud!

Not sure if sarcasm...
Hey, I can make some pretty okay money with some nice health benefits, stock options, and retirement options while doing pretty minimal work.
It may not be ambitious but it will allow me to care for myself and the family I plan on having and I'll be able to spend time with them since I won't be overstressed or overworked.
Its not what I want to do either and I'll have to do some real hard work for crap pay till I get there but I think I'll be content enough in the position and that the benefits and pay will be worth it.

They are disgusting creatures, they hand me notes out of their mouths a lot and it's revolting, I mean money is already filthy why add to it? Why would you put that in your mouth!?.

And another bloody thing; why do they fucking fold it up, is it so I have to fuck about unfolding it to put it in the till and flatten it for the banking at the end of the day?

Grr.

Folded is a lot better than some of the money I get. I frequently get money thats so damn crumpled and rippled that the electronic safes we have to put the money in doesn't believe the bills are real legal tender and reject them!
So damn annoying. I just wanna say "bro, buy a goddamn wallet or something! Shit."

No I get that too it's just less frequent. Also see; people pulling change and buttons and tissues and cthulus nipple clamps out of their pocket, chucking it all over my damn counter and wondering why I'm agitated with them. BUY A FUCKING WALLET. Fuck.

We should do an angry young retail worker show or something. Get @Dark Knifer: in on it.

Thankfully I don't have a counter that they can ruin with their pocket crap.
That sounds cathartic. We should set some asshole customers on fire.
For science.

That sounds fantastically cathartic. I'll begin drafting a plan at once. Or get a minion to do it.

 

[Jodan]

I work a a board game cafe. but i spend most of my time reading and writing history.

It's a long shot, but where is this cafe? Oxford?

No its in Winnipeg. Do alot of history students work at boardgame cafes across the world. Am I just one of a proud group of underemployed historians... the answer is probably.

 

[soren7550]

While I technically have three jobs at the moment, I don't really have a whole lot of hours with any of them.

Cleaning lady at a store/after school program - Used to be twice a week and a couple of extra hours whenever it got really messy, but now I've been whittled down to a day.

Personal Assistant - I help a mostly paralyzed guy with his mail and bills, and made damn good money for it, but since he has a lot of appointments and his phone is utter trash (whenever he/I try to call, I can hear maybe every fifth word uttered), I haven't been able to do much work for him, and the last two times I was supposed to work, they fell through.

GameStop - Somehow I managed to get a job there, and while the boss really likes me, I have my doubts as to if I'll last long there, since they have seemingly high sales expectations. But, hopefully I'll get better, since so far my work has more been training than actual work, and I was sick the whole time. But those credit cards will be the death of me.

 

[Burgers2013]

Wow, the crowd here is very diverse. Really interesting; more teachers than I would expect too. Man, it'll be great for students to have a teacher who understands those newfangled video games.

I'm a chemical engineer. I recently got a job at a chemical plant in operations. Essentially, there's a mud slide of paper work to be done all the time, and eventually I'll be called when something goes wrong. For now I'm just following everyone around and learning about 600 new acronyms. My previous job was essentially bench-scale R&D for the semiconductor industry.

 

[FPLOON]

I'm currently unemployed doing freelance-based yard work for various friends and acquaintances... Right now trying to get a [real] temporary job for the spring while I set up my private college transfer papers for next year's fall semester...

 

[angryscotsman93]

College student, working towards a Mechanical Engineering degree and a Coast Guard license to work on ships. There's some serious money to be made in the industry, you know. The disadvantages of this choice are as follows:

-College life kinda sucks. My school is roughly 84% male, and "dating within the gates" is not advised. Plus, we really don't get out much.

-Once you're at sea, you're out there for a while. It varies depending on your ship, but a single job could last anywhere from three months to a year. During that time, you're gonna be working your ass off- eight hour work days, then about four hours of overtime, all within an engine room that's usually about 120 degrees Fahrenheit, if you're near the equator. Sure, you make good money, but it can be tedious, and even dangerous work.

-The sea-faring life isn't particularly family friendly. Most of my professors pretty much left the industry the moment they had a kid, because they didn't want to be an absent father figure, and just ended up grabbing a job onshore in some co-gen plant. When I was on a training cruise (sea internship), my First Engineer had graduated from Maine Maritime in 1980, but left the industry a year later when the jobs dried up. He got a job at a nuclear plant and worked there until about 2005, when it shut down. After that, he went back to school, re-obtained his license, and he's just been grinding sea-time until he can get his Chief Engineer's license.

So, all in all, the schooling kinda blows, and it's not great for people who like their families, but there's good money to be made, and you can travel the world on someone else's dime. That's what I'm looking forward to.

 

[Kuilui]

I currently work at a deli making awful money, the people are nice, my boss lets me work whenever I want and I basically run the night shift and train all the new guys since I've been there a long time so more good stuff for a resume. Its acceptable for the moment. Also I'm about to get a bachelors degree that I have no interest in but should look good on a resume. Then hopefully onto a real job..

 

[xmbts]

Currently I've got one job as a miserable sales clerk in customer service, and another job as a miserable apprentice electrician, though I really don't have any interest in keeping either one, hoping to find a better career path soon.

 

[Sylocat]

I'm a director and actor at the Young Shakespeare Players, a nonprofit educational theatre program for children and teens. I also freelance as a video editor and animator.

 

[Stg]

I'm a heavy equipment field operator in the oil field. Hours are a pain (almost 200 hours on my last paycheck) but the pay is amazing, although it leaves very little time for the family.

 

[Pinkamena]

Normally I would say "student". But recently I miraculously landed a job at CERN, so now I work on getting the LHC back up and running after the long shutdown.
EDIT: To clarify, I mainly test electronics and make software applications for monitoring and interacting with the quench protection system.

 

[Jesterscup]

Day job: Web Developer

Evening job: Drag-queen / performance artist