Full Official TMNT Trailer Is A Triumph Of Incomprehensibility

[Eclipse Dragon]

I needed a very strong drink after watching that trailer. The problem is that I'm at work so I have to suffer from that trailer being stuck in my head until I get home.

You too huh? I knew I should've waited, but I didn't, and now this.

---

OT: Going just off what's presented in this trailer and the Transformers movies, I'm going to say, for all those who are feeling physical pain right now because of the horrible design of the turtles, don't worry! You'll hardly ever get to see them, instead you'll most likely be looking at Megan Fox and everything exploding for most of the running time.

Also the turtle's face, what does that remind me of?

Spoiler

 

[RealRT]

Aha.
Mm-hmm.
Yup.
2003 series is still the best.

 

[JPArbiter]

I think it is a jump that TCRI intentionally created the Turtles right now. I see where the assumption is coming from though.

 

[Twyce]

I'm getting really annoyed in this ongoing trend to replace character motivation with rampant interconnections. As if April O'Neil needed some additional contrivance to be involved in the plot.

Agreed. Ugh.

I think my real problem with this trailer is that it's just so... bland. Aside from one or two scenes, you could replace the turtles with any other super/action hero(s) out there. TMNT is pretty unique brand and to see it's new movie advertised any other action flick has me disheartened. I mean, comeon! It's the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Inject some personality into the trailer, show us it's different that EVERY OTHER HERO FLICK out there. I mean the shot of them crashing into the hummer was alright, but the whole thing overall leaves much to be desired. Especially as a first impression.

I admit I might be jaded because I hold the '90s movie in such high regard, but this just seemed so lackluster. It doesn't have to be crazy and kooky, but it also doesn't have to be Generic Action Movie B.

Also, question - is Megan Fox unable to close her mouth? Every single scene I've seen her in, it's open.

 

[Scarim Coral]

Heh, I thought it was supposed to be title "Ninja Turtles". I guess Bay did bend over to the fan for the titles and possible the origin (now that Teenage Mutant is back on and that guy said they "created" heroes, it very lightly that they did so via mutation but I won't rule out that the source of the creation could be of alien origin).
Now I think about it, is Splinter even in the film since there has been no official photo of him and I was under the impression they didn't create a mentor unless April father is Splinter (which will only enrage the fans more).

 

[SilverStuddedSquirre]

I'm getting really annoyed in this ongoing trend to replace character motivation with rampant interconnections. As if April O'Neil needed some additional contrivance to be involved in the plot.

Quoting just so I can make my total agreement with you known to all the land. I blame George Lucas, BTW, who introduced that kind of thing in the original SW trilogy and then turned it up to 11 in the prequels. In the upcoming star wars movies, I'm willing to bet every single character will be related to every other character and the galaxy's human population will face extinction due to genetic complications from inbreeding.

Agreed about the Plot contrivances! But when you START by throwing the entire Origin story of the franchise in the garbage, then dicking around with literally every single piece of Cannon, you have to expect that. In fact your very next move must be to Contrive a reason for why you just did that in the first place.

About George Lucas:
Aside from Luke and Leia being Vader's children, what are you on about? Yes, Kenobi trained Vader, so you have one family, and a teacher. What other instances of Familial inter connectivity do you refer to? I think you have actually managed to single out the ONE thing that wasn't a problem with either trilogy of movies. Even the ridiculousness of Chewie and Yoda being War-Pals is not really that Farfetched. It's Fucking Stupid, but I really don't think it's a problem inherent to the movies.

 

[RossaLincoln]

About George Lucas:
Aside from Luke and Leia being Vader's children, what are you on about? Yes, Kenobi trained Vader, so you have one family, and a teacher. What other instances of Familial inter connectivity do you refer to? I think you have actually managed to single out the ONE thing that wasn't a problem with either trilogy of movies. Even the ridiculousness of Chewie and Yoda being War-Pals is not really that Farfetched. It's Fucking Stupid, but I really don't think it's a problem inherent to the movies.

I was being a bit flippant, but: Yoda trained Dooku who trained Qui-Gon who trained Obi-Wan who trained Anakin. Meanwhile, Chewie and yoda were pals, Anakin built C-3PO, Anakin was apparently friends with greedo as a kid, and so on. Everyone is so intertwined that it stretches suspension of disbelief.

Of course, if the prequels hadn't sucked so much, I might not have minded the above, though I think the above is part of Lucas' convoluted thought processes being allowed to develop without a single person being allowed to offer constructive criticism or suggestions for changes.

 

[Nazulu]

Really? The story is they tried to create hero's and it's the Ninja Turtles? Can someone think of a worse idea because I want to see if it's possible. Sometimes I reckon they should skip their past and just make the movie fun.

You know, I wouldn't mind these constant rehashes if they actually did something interesting instead of just following trends, and I'm so sick of the shitty jokes. Back before Hollywood became terrible they at least had writers think of jokes that most could enjoy (that were clever in some way or executed well) instead of this stupid childish crap.

 

[Somethingfake]

Their faces make me think of Gollum.

 

[JaceArveduin]

Well, Mikey doing that joke about his mask sounds about right for his personality, but everything else about the tone of the trailer feels too . . . generic dark action movie. I'll give this a pass.

Yeah, I think that pretty much sums it up for me. I wonder if they'll end up riding mecha-godzilla while they're at it.

 

[SonOfVoorhees]

They look fine and atleast the characteristics of Mickey seem spot on. Looks like a cross between the originals and the cartoon show. But still not seen them fighting yet and thats my only issue. Now that could be good or bad.

 

[SilverStuddedSquirre]

About George Lucas:
Aside from Luke and Leia being Vader's children, what are you on about? Yes, Kenobi trained Vader, so you have one family, and a teacher. What other instances of Familial inter connectivity do you refer to? I think you have actually managed to single out the ONE thing that wasn't a problem with either trilogy of movies. Even the ridiculousness of Chewie and Yoda being War-Pals is not really that Farfetched. It's Fucking Stupid, but I really don't think it's a problem inherent to the movies.

I was being a bit flippant, but: Yoda trained Dooku who trained Qui-Gon who trained Anakin. Meanwhile, Chewie and yoda were pals, Anakin built C-3PO, Anakin was apparently friends with greedo as a kid, and so on. Everyone is so intertwined that it stretches suspension of disbelief.

Of course, if the prequels hadn't sucked so much, I might not have minded the above, though I think the above is part of Lucas' convoluted thought processes being allowed to develop without a single person being allowed to offer constructive criticism or suggestions for changes.

Ah I get stuff. I was being to literal. Though on the Yoda point "For eight humdred years, have I trained Jedi." EVERYBODY was probably trained by somebody, who was trained by Yoda. You can probably find more connections to Yoda in the SW universe than Kevin Bacon in ours.

I also apologize for the "dumbest thing I'd read today" comment. There have been a few poorly written, mis informative articles in the last week, and I'm testy with the Escapist right now.

 

[SilverStuddedSquirre]

Well, Mikey doing that joke about his mask sounds about right for his personality, but everything else about the tone of the trailer feels too . . . generic dark action movie. I'll give this a pass.

Yeah, I think that pretty much sums it up for me. I wonder if they'll end up riding mecha-godzilla while they're at it.

Yes, there will bee a scene where they use Mecha-Godzilla to Jump over a shark so they can remove the Crystal Skull from the Top of the Technodrome, cutting off its power.

 

[JaceArveduin]

Well, Mikey doing that joke about his mask sounds about right for his personality, but everything else about the tone of the trailer feels too . . . generic dark action movie. I'll give this a pass.

Yeah, I think that pretty much sums it up for me. I wonder if they'll end up riding mecha-godzilla while they're at it.

Yes, there will bee a scene where they use Mecha-Godzilla to Jump over a shark so they can remove the Crystal Skull from the Top of the Technodrome, cutting off its power.

You forgot the part well Mecha-zilla sends the Dragonzord as a distraction and it turns out it's a Trap

hue, captcha agrees with me whole-heartedly with a rousing "oh yes"

 

[Void Bringer]

Trailer beat my expectations.


Granted they weren't very high to begin with.

 

[RossaLincoln]

Ah I get stuff. I was being to literal. Though on the Yoda point "For eight humdred years, have I trained Jedi." EVERYBODY was probably trained by somebody, who was trained by Yoda. You can probably find more connections to Yoda in the SW universe than Kevin Bacon in ours.

And my mind is blown. I predict disney has "6 degrees of Yoda" planned to coincide with the release of the JJ Abrams movie.

 

[rasputin0009]

Wait, why were they all serious with the "Cowabunga" bros? Why aren't they eating pizza in a sewer? Why was Megan Fox not wearing short shorts?! So many questions!

But they'll have to wait until it's on Netflix in one year's time because I'm not watching this in theatres.

 

[coolbond]

to be fair the original cartoon took the source material and threw it out the window too

 

[SilverStuddedSquirre]

Ah I get stuff. I was being to literal. Though on the Yoda point "For eight humdred years, have I trained Jedi." EVERYBODY was probably trained by somebody, who was trained by Yoda. You can probably find more connections to Yoda in the SW universe than Kevin Bacon in ours.

And my mind is blown. I predict disney has "6 degrees of Yoda" planned to coincide with the release of the JJ Abrams movie.

Ok Ok ok.......Ok. Ninja Turtles to Yoda.

April O'Neil is Played by Megan Fox, who was in the Transformers Movie with Shia laBouf. Shia played Indiana Jones JR.
(takes a second to shudder and suppress bad memories) alongside Harrisson Ford, who is also Han Solo. Han hangs with Chewbacca, who fought in the Clone Wars, with Yoda.

April o'niel, Indiana Jones Jr, Indana Jones Sr, Han Solo, Chewbacca, Yoda.

/ mic drop