Gentlemen, Is chivalry dead?

[Blind Sight]

The Chap reminds me of http://artofmanliness.com/, also a great site for gentlemanly things.

It's funny you mention that actually, I was driving home with two girls I know yesterday. The whole ride home they discussed how many men have fucked them over and how all men are assholes. In the middle of it I said "here's a thought, have you ever actually dated a guy who came off as a gentleman?" They both laughed. Alot.

I definitely think that there's plenty of gentlemen left, but there's definitely a case of them dying out. However, that can easily be stopped. Check out some of the sites above, treat women decently, open doors for everyone, etc. Only you can prevent the general lack of respect that is going on in the social dating scene.

Chivalry is just disguised chauvanism. I hope it dies.

Yes, because treating women with respect and dignity is obviously chauvinism. Unless of course you're going with the medieval definition, but the majority of people here are talking about acting decent around women, as opposed to being a sexist scumbag. Being a gentleman goes farther then that as well, and focuses on being respectful of everyone.

Yes, chivalry is absolutely terrible, we wouldn't want people treating others NICELY, would we? /sarcasm

 

[quiet_samurai]

You can still be chivalrous and support equality. In the end it's really nothing more then having good manners and making people feel appreciated, and not necessarily those of the opposite sex exclusively. Anyone who says it supports inequality is either dumb or ungrateful.

 

[DonMartin]

Chivalry is not dead. Chivalry can't die from a few "What you don't think I can take care of myself?" and a slap or two on the face. Feminism is taking itself to a new level if you ask me. The thing in my honest opinion is that, chivalry is just being good to other people. I myself try to treat everybody better, no mater the gender. As for the ladies, I've got one, so no chap, chivalry isn't even close to dying.

You chose an excellent subject for your very first comment, it seems. Eh, old chum?

Welcome to the Escapist!

 

[Naheal]

Chivalry is as dead as a zombie.

 

[the Dept of Science]

I have heard people say that they have been scolded by women for holding a door open for them, the women citing that this is "anti-feminist" or "patronizing" or something.

I have never, EVER been chastised for holding the door for a lady. I think that woman today follow a more enlightened brand of "lipstick feminism" in which they define themselves as equal to men in most societal constructs, yet acknowledge their femininity as something to be celebrated in its purest form as well.
I often feel that we guys have yet to find a healthy balance between equality of the sexes and proper chauvinism when it is called for. Perhaps that's why we enjoy our video games? They allow for a chauvinist outlet that we might otherwise be neglecting.

Funny thing is that I really wasn't sure whether to give that as an example, because the only accounts I've heard were people on the internet and "friend of a friend" kindof things. I'm not sure if they were isolated incidents or really if they had happened at all.
However, your point about acknowledging femininity is something I was really trying hard to put my finger on. I beleive that women and men (generally) act differently, on a non-frivolous level, however, I was wondering how I could reconcile that belief with my "you should be equally nice to both men and women".
Thanks

 

[Myster XIII]

I blame Feminism. That and nobody has any self respect these days. Myself included. I will do ALOT of messed up things for just a hundred bucks.

 

[open trap]

I try to be as chivalris as possible, i often offer my jacket to a freezing woman and just am curdious over all, except in certain cituations of course.

 

[archvile93]

The Chap reminds me of http://artofmanliness.com/, also a great site for gentlemanly things.

It's funny you mention that actually, I was driving home with two girls I know yesterday. The whole ride home they discussed how many men have fucked them over and how all men are assholes. In the middle of it I said "here's a thought, have you ever actually dated a guy who came off as a gentleman?" They both laughed. Alot.

I definitely think that there's plenty of gentlemen left, but there's definitely a case of them dying out. However, that can easily be stopped. Check out some of the sites above, treat women decently, open doors for everyone, etc. Only you can prevent the general lack of respect that is going on in the social dating scene.

Chivalry is just disguised chauvanism. I hope it dies.

Yes, because treating women with respect and dignity is obviously chauvinism. Unless of course you're going with the medieval definition, but the majority of people here are talking about acting decent around women, as opposed to being a sexist scumbag. Being a gentleman goes farther then that as well, and focuses on being respectful of everyone.

Yes, chivalry is absolutely terrible, we wouldn't want people treating others NICELY, would we? /sarcasm

Read the rest of my post.

 

[Blind Sight]

Chivalry is more than just manners, it's specifically oriented towards one gender, and that kind of social inequality really has no place in a society that highly values gender equality.

You're using an old definition, so that's understandable. But modern-day 'gentlemanly' groups like the Art of Manliness focuses on treating everyone in a gentlemanly fashion (yes I love the word gentlemanly, it's just somehow awesome). Just like everything else, the definition has changed with the times.

 

[archvile93]

Chivalry is just disguised chauvanism. I hope it dies.

Nay, young impetuous rogue. It shall outlast your snap judgment. Also, good sir, I would be less than chivalrous were I to ignore the opportunity to educate you in the ways of spelling lexicon that finds it roots in French Language; Observe: not chauvanism, but chauvinism. From the french figure Chauvin.

I really don't care how chauvanism is spelled. Also, read the rest of my post.

 

[Blind Sight]

Read the rest of my post.

Ah, that wasn't there when I posted, my mistake.

 

[Cain_Zeros]

It's at about -7 and bleeding, but I intend to make the Heal check dammit!

 

[the Dept of Science]

-snip-

Doesn't matter, mate. They don't know that you also hold doors for men and won't believe you when you tell them. Trust me. Even if you hold the door for a male and female at the same time, she'll assume you're being patronizing to her. Or maybe it's just me. Perhaps if I were attractive it would be sweet instead of patronizing. Who knows?

The other guy that quoted me on saying this said that he had never had anyone say anything of the sort, and I'll admit, neither have I. Although I don't want to speculate to much about why it happens to you and not us, I'm guessing things like "vibe" can be quite important. I tend to make as little a deal out of it as possible, make it look like a perfectly natural thing to do. It could be tonnes of factors, I'm from England and perhaps the women have a different attitude here (most of them are very polite and say "thank you").

 

[blankedboy]

Sadly, yes. It was awesome while it lasted, though.


[sub]I still say 'huzzah' all the time....[/sub]

 

[Pegghead]

It exists in proper tf2 servers these days, if you ask me.

It exists in proper tf2 as well:


Men (for the most part) still hold doors open for women, try to cover the bill when courting, uphold the time-honoured tradition of "Ladies first" and will at least be semi-kinder and more courteous to women than men in real life. Aspects of chivalry still hold steadfast, so while it may not be as great as it once was the noble gentleman is still a thriving species.

 

[SwimmingRock]

-snip-

Doesn't matter, mate. They don't know that you also hold doors for men and won't believe you when you tell them. Trust me. Even if you hold the door for a male and female at the same time, she'll assume you're being patronizing to her. Or maybe it's just me. Perhaps if I were attractive it would be sweet instead of patronizing. Who knows?

The other guy that quoted me on saying this said that he had never had anyone say anything of the sort, and I'll admit, neither have I. Although I don't want to speculate to much about why it happens to you and not us, I'm guessing things like "vibe" can be quite important. I tend to make as little a deal out of it as possible, make it look like a perfectly natural thing to do. It could be tonnes of factors, I'm from England and perhaps the women have a different attitude here (most of them are very polite and say "thank you").

Might have a point there. I live in Holland, where emancipation has lead to a generation of women who want to be seen as hardcore, independent badasses rather than ladies, and are quick to get offended by any implication that they may have stereotypically feminine qualities. Could be I'm just living in the wrong country.

As for the 'vibe' bit, maybe it's the fact I generally wear all black? I don't make a big deal out of it either, so it's not like I'm intentionally making it look patronizing.

 

[SimuLord]

Chivalry is dead, killed by the devil of feminism. Although it lives on in a sort of Polish Resistance kind of way among a certain class of girl who wants a real man, not some neutered metrosexual.