How did you do that?

[Sam G]

I closed my eyes and squeezed them really tight, like I had constupation.

How did you win the election?

 

[Ren3004]

I promised free popcorn for everyone.


How did you get all that popcorn?

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

I voted for Ren3004.

How did you learn to swim?

 

[Ren3004]

It's my super-power.


How did you get a hand that shoots fire?

 

[Stoic raptor]

I made a wrist mounted flamethrower

How did you dig to the center of the earth?

 

[Ren3004]

I had this really big shovel.


How did you get those beautiful, shiny... ears?

 

[Sam G]

I use Head and Shoulders!

How did you get banned from the escapist in just 30 minutes?

 

[Ren3004]

I posted "FIRST!" in all the threads I could find.


How did you find out where I live?

 

[Sam G]

I found out your name, google it, went on images, and clicked the one with your family coat of arms.

How did you kill all them ninjas?

 

[Ren3004]

The more ninjas there are, the less effective they are.


How did your hair turn white?

 

[Sam G]

Once again, Head and Shoulders!

How did you serve that foo', bearing in mind you're in a wheelchair?

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

I picked him up and threw him into a pane of glass.

How did you punch Chuck Norris and live?

 

[Ren3004]

He thought that living with the injuries he gave me was a fate worse that death.



How did you escape from Batman?

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

I told him that the Joker was doing something worse than i was, and he just flew off.

How did you save Timmy from the well?

 

[Sam G]

With my trusty hookshot! ...What? You didn't specify you wanted him alive...

How did you fall out of a plane without a parachute and live?

 

[Ren3004]

The plane hadn't taken off.


How did you lift a plane all by yourself?

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

Many months of training...and a forklift.

How did you sneak a Jaguar in through Airport security?

 

[Ren3004]

I told them it was a set of golf clubs.


How did you find the Holy Grail?

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

I asked for directions.

How did you defeat Cthulhu?

 

[Ren3004]

I called Jack Bauer.


How did you get rid of Jack Bauer?