How to fight.

CANofKAM

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with any luck, i am going to get into a fight tomorrow at school. This guy is the biggest douche ever and keeps walking all over me and i about to do something if he doesn't stop screwing with me. Any tips on how to win a fight? i am pretty confident i can win but some tips couldn't hurt.
 

Scolar Visari

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CANofKAM said:
with any luck, i am going to get into a fight tomorrow at school. This guy is the biggest douche ever and keeps walking all over me and i about to do something if he doesn't stop screwing with me. Any tips on how to win a fight? i am pretty confident i can win but some tips couldn't hurt.
Quick and violent. Use defensive words such as "I don't want to fight". Get him to threaten you with bodily harm and you're good to go. Strike unexpectdly, hitting weaker points on the body.

But really, you probably shouldn't be fighting and I probably shouldn't be telling you this.
 

SaturdayS

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It doesn't matter how big the fucker is, they've all got a neck and a groin!

I've made a notable amount of friends through fights. Being the little masochist that I am I wouldn't be able to stop giggling when they were trying to hurt me. Usually we'd all end up laughing then my "bullies" would always want to hang out during non aggressive pass times.
 

MadeinHell

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Do the "morgan" move! You may not win but at least your groin and honor will be intact.


Honestly though if you want to end it quick and fast hit him with your palm straight into the point between the tip of the nose (between the eyes). It will stun him and possibly defeat him, and it's really easy to pull off. One thing about it, it has to be done in the beginning of the fight and not in some later part of it. Otherwise your aim will be slightly off and you can hit him in the eye really hard. And while blowing off some steam while fighting a guy is OK (in my book) crippling him for the rest of his life is not.

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/8246/humanskullside.jpg couldn't get it to turn into a picture for some reason.

I'm suggesting this because since you said that he is a big bad bully he is probably stronger and bigger than you, because of that you can't get up to a situation when you "wrestle with him".

Oh and forget about trying to kick him. If you are not trained in any form of martial arts your kicking will probably not be very effective and only get you exposed to an attack (possibly to groin area), because of that use your fists to continuously damage one of his areas.

Good luck on that fight. I personally never start a fight but if I have to, I usually win (never really, lost one time it just ended up with a tie).

PS. Last thing I forgot to mention. Don't hold yourself back. If you need to hit him, hit him hard, no pussy fighting in real life.
 

Ham_authority95

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Bring friends. And a heavy tool of some sort.

That or don't get into a situation where you would need to fight in the first place...

EDIT: Or pull a Tyler Durden and scream/laugh like you're having the best time of your life.
 

HT_Black

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Go for the adam's apple, testicles, and the spot on his head just in front of his ear. Hit those hard enough and often enough, and it's in the bag. Other spots of opportunity include his hamstring, his armpit, his funnybone, and the joint behind his kneecap, which can be crippled with an extremely well-directed frontal blow.

Also, make sure you come across as the victim if there are any witnesses around. Then you can pass it off as self defense.
 

MadeinHell

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Am I the only person scared by the fact that half the people suggest grouping up on the guy and/or crippling him with a heavy tool?

WHERE IS YOUR HONOR!

SaturdayS said:
It doesn't matter how big the fucker is, they've all got a neck and a groin!

I've made a notable amount of friends through fights. Being the little masochist that I am I wouldn't be able to stop giggling when they were trying to hurt me. Usually we'd all end up laughing then my "bullies" would always want to hang out during non aggressive pass times.
Yeah fighting (for serious) has a funny way of making people that fight each other some kind of friends. After all you have already broke the last barrier, you know each other well, why not like each other? Plus in case of grown up man it seems to be a good way of settling the differences between them (doesn't work in case of women, they'll hate eachother all the way till the end of days).
It's kinda funny this way... I'm not really sure why does it work that way but it just does.

Oh and it only works in case of "honest" fights, mano a mano without friends or cheap tricks just you and your gut...

DAMN I NEED TO FIGHT SOMEONE!
 

Ham_authority95

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MadeinHell said:
Yeah fighting (for serious) has a funny way of making people that fight each other some kind of friends. After all you have already broke the last barrier, you know each other well, why not like each other? Plus in case of grown up man it seems to be a good way of settling the differences between them (doesn't work in case of women, they'll hate eachother all the way till the end of days).
It's kinda funny this way... I'm not really sure why does it work that way but it just does.
Hey, having violent, personal space-invading, touchy-feely contact helps people connect in many ways ;D
 

MadeinHell

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Ham_authority95 said:
MadeinHell said:
Yeah fighting (for serious) has a funny way of making people that fight each other some kind of friends. After all you have already broke the last barrier, you know each other well, why not like each other? Plus in case of grown up man it seems to be a good way of settling the differences between them (doesn't work in case of women, they'll hate eachother all the way till the end of days).
It's kinda funny this way... I'm not really sure why does it work that way but it just does.
Hey, having violent, personal space-invading, touchy-feely contact helps people connect in many ways ;D
Hmm... am I the only one who had the words
"I had the range, she had the flexibility" appear in my head when I read that? ;D
 

Ham_authority95

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MadeinHell said:
Am I the only person scared by the fact that half the people suggest grouping up on the guy and/or crippling him with a heavy tool?

WHERE IS YOUR HONOR!
The OP said that he wants to teach this guy a lesson, so we're giving him advice to actually teach him a fucking lesson.

We hardly live in feudel Japan...XD
 

The_Graff

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Nose, throat, balls, joints. hit these as hard and repeatedly as possible until one of you is on the floor. also, on that topic, try not to go down as it can put you in a world of shit.
 

Ham_authority95

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MadeinHell said:
Ham_authority95 said:
MadeinHell said:
Yeah fighting (for serious) has a funny way of making people that fight each other some kind of friends. After all you have already broke the last barrier, you know each other well, why not like each other? Plus in case of grown up man it seems to be a good way of settling the differences between them (doesn't work in case of women, they'll hate eachother all the way till the end of days).
It's kinda funny this way... I'm not really sure why does it work that way but it just does.
Hey, having violent, personal space-invading, touchy-feely contact helps people connect in many ways ;D
Hmm... am I the only one who had the words
"I had the range, she had the flexibility" appear in my head when I read that? ;D
Oh, MANY words appeared in my head after I read that.
 

YouCallMeNighthawk

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CANofKAM said:
with any luck, i am going to get into a fight tomorrow at school. This guy is the biggest douche ever and keeps walking all over me and i about to do something if he doesn't stop screwing with me. Any tips on how to win a fight? i am pretty confident i can win but some tips couldn't hurt.
When he swings with his right arm duck to your left, this will leave the side of his ribs exposed, just pack your hardest punch there (visa versa if he swings with his left) this should hopefully wind him. repeat that process and only swing when you have an opportunity and let him tire himself out.

Never get knocked to the floor, this essentially means you are FUCKED!!!! unless you are super quick at recovering.
 

demoman_chaos

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CANofKAM said:
with any luck, i am going to get into a fight tomorrow at school. This guy is the biggest douche ever and keeps walking all over me and i about to do something if he doesn't stop screwing with me. Any tips on how to win a fight? i am pretty confident i can win but some tips couldn't hurt.
Keep your cool, don't get angry. IF you get mad, you lose control. Stay calm and collected. Let him go into rage mode. Entice him into going berserk by doing a few jabs and backing up. Once he is frustrated, let him charge in. When he does, bring him to the ground. In his fury, he won't have control of himself and you'll easily be able to advance your position until you get him in a good enough spot to drop some heavy hits. If he tries to roll over, takes his back. Lock your legs into his to keep him from turning back around. If you get a good opening, get your arm under his chin and choke his ass.
It may be boring to watch to the spectators and some will call you a pussy for taking him to the ground and beating him there, but none can argue against its effectiveness.

In short, stay calm and collected, get him enraged, exploit his lack of control, taking him to the ground can give you an easy win, stay defensive and wait for your openings, no mercy, but most importantly is to keep yourself protected.