is this romantic or creepy?

[CrustyOatmeal]

the difference between being romantic and creepy is if the feelings are mutual. so if she has the same feelings for you it will come off as a sweet gesture but if she doesnt it is going to leave an awkward feeling between everybody in the band.

i say ask her out and then later on down the line show her the song. this way you avoid any unnecessary awkwardness that might occur. just think, how would you feel if a chick in your art class painted a 4 foot mural of you (keep in mind you dont really have feelings for her), you would feel a bit uncomfortable. this is the situation you are putting yourself in

 

[Marowit]

Dude, just ask her out for a slice of pizza. If it goes well, and you start to date then spring the song on her. If you just come out of the blue and give her a song about how you feel 99% of the time that will just come across insanely creepy - this isn't some teenie bopper movie.

 

[darthotaku]

Dude, just ask her out for a slice of pizza. If it goes well, and you start to date then spring the song on her. If you just come out of the blue and give her a song about how you feel 99% of the time that will just come across insanely creepy - this isn't some teenie bopper movie.

we started the band over a slice of pizza actually.

 

[DocBalance]

My inner romantic says this is a very, very good idea. So, avoid this idea like the plague and just talk to her. My inner romantic is a bit of a 'tard >.>

 

[Marowit]

Dude, just ask her out for a slice of pizza. If it goes well, and you start to date then spring the song on her. If you just come out of the blue and give her a song about how you feel 99% of the time that will just come across insanely creepy - this isn't some teenie bopper movie.

we started the band over a slice of pizza actually.

If you need to ask if something is creepy, in general, it's creepy. Just ask her out on a regular ol' date. The whole, 'immatellyouhowifeelthroughasongandnotjusttalktoyoulikeaperson-tact' seems like an obvious pitfall.

 

[wolf thing]

go for it. if she doesn't return your affection after the song then she wouldn't any way. also one of my old physics treachers told me this "fate favers the brave"

 

[Lilani]

I think you should run this by her in a private, one-on-one setting. I know from personal experience as a girl that when guys get too taciturn and stand-offish about sharing their feelings, it just becomes a turn-off.

For example, the day before Valentine's this year, a friend who until that moment I had no clue had feelings for me asked me if I had any plans for Valentine's...through a text message. I think I would have turned him down either way, but it erked me that he would try to initiate a relationship through such an impersonal and non-intimate means.

So I guess to sum up my advice, find a place where you can be open with her. Share the song, but be in a situation where you both can be honest with each other without feeling uncomfortable.

 

[Darkauthor81]

Why not try telling her in a normal non-awkward way?

THIS!

This is not a romantic comedy where she'll bat her eyes and giggle and everything will turn out ok in the end. This will end badly for you.

 

[Talespinner]

As a general rule of thumb:

"If you're in doubt, it's most likely creepy"

 

[Alphavillain]

My inner romantic says this is a very, very good idea. So, avoid this idea like the plague and just talk to her. My inner romantic is a bit of a 'tard >.>

Well put. Whenever my romantic instincts tell me to do one thing, I know I should avoid doing it at all costs. I'm a romantic, I have impossible standards for everyone, myself included.

 

[Trivun]

So theres this girl I like. She wanted to start a band and I'm the only drummer she knows, because of that I'm in the band and I also was asked to write a song because I also happen to be good at that.
I then wrote a song describing my feelings for her, I would like to ask the people of the escapist if it would be wierd if I suggest we play that song during the next band meeting.

I didn't go so far as to use her name in the song, but everyone who sees the lyrics will figure it out.

so should I give her the song or not?

edit: nobody has yet to see the song so I don't have to bring it up if it's a bad idea

and the band is only starting to form really. right now it's just her on guitar, me on drums and possibly one of my friends on bass. if this doesn't work than it won't really disrupt the band.

Personally, I find that fairly romantic, however if you do this in front of the rest of the band then it could be a bit more awkward. I'd recommend perhaps telling her more directly that you like her, without the rest of the band knowing. Write another song as backup for the band in case things don't go as well as you like. Or maybe try giving her that song, saying to her that you wrote it for her, and see how she reacts, but again, do it privately, without the rest of the band knowing. Other than that, all I can say is good luck, and I hope things go well for you .

 

[Alphavillain]

go for it. if she doesn't return your affection after the song then she wouldn't any way. also one of my old physics treachers told me this "fate favers the brave"

People only say that because they have regrets over not being more outgoing. People are generally conservative. If they were more outgoing, they'd regret most of what they did.

 

[Giuglea]

it depends on what you wrote in the song..it would be a bad idea if u had lyrics like:
"love me like i`m a 10 year old dying of cancer."
or
"do to me what america did to iraq"
or
"love me like i`m your father........Luke"
what i`m trying to say is it could be cute or it might be too much..best of luck though

 

[ImperialSunlight]

Personally I don't think its a very good idea to be in a romantic relationship with a member of your band. It could cause it to fall apart. But if you really love her, it sounds like a genuine guesture.

 

[ComicsAreWeird]

Totally not creepy. But also not the best way to tell her your feelings, if she values her privacy. Try telling her in a normal way. If she digs you, great.

If she doesnt, just say "Damn, i should´ve just play the song", she´ll ask "what song?" and you will reply "this song" and start playing it. She´ll be all over you, man. Or not...but at least you both get to laugh it off and make the situation less awkward.

But seriously...try to judge her character and see if she would like that approach. Each girl works in a different way, some would love to get their own song...others might find it corny. Of course, it depends if the song has the right tone and lyrics.

 

[NinjaDeathSlap]

imo it's completely dependent on what the girl is like. I'd say about half the girls I know would love to be asked out this way and find it really romantic, while the other half would just see it as a bit pathetic. If you think you know her well enough and you think she'd like this... then take the risk. (I know this probably isn't the clear cut answer you were hoping for but I gotta be honest)

 

[Tulks]

"The main difference between sleaze and charm is whether she likes it."

That said, this strikes me as an awkward silence waiting to happen. Find another way.

 

[Smooth Operator]

The song is a really long shot, real life isn't Hollywood and things can go horribly wrong.

Spilling your feeling on someone unexpectedly is a 9/10 chance you sentenced any possible relationship to death, trust me I did that alot, unless she is really really into you don't do that.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

Maybe you should show her the song when it's just you and her.

 

[Zizzousa]

So theres this girl I like. She wanted to start a band and I'm the only drummer she knows, because of that I'm in the band and I also was asked to write a song because I also happen to be good at that.
I then wrote a song describing my feelings for her, I would like to ask the people of the escapist if it would be wierd if I suggest we play that song during the next band meeting.

I didn't go so far as to use her name in the song, but everyone who sees the lyrics will figure it out.

so should I give her the song or not?

edit: nobody has yet to see the song so I don't have to bring it up if it's a bad idea

and the band is only starting to form really. right now it's just her on guitar, me on drums and possibly one of my friends on bass. if this doesn't work than it won't really disrupt the band.

If she figures out what it's about and isn't into you, it'll be hella awkward. But! If the song's good enough, and you have inklings that she might feel the same way about you, then go for it! Just so long as you've revised the song a couple of times and made sure it isn't shit.