Make baseless assumptions about game characters!
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"Gordon Freeman" was born Petre P. Carp in Romania, and worked as a farmhand for most of his life, his amazing ability to pick up sheep and have them hover in front of his face without using his hands proving to be an incredibly useful feat for his line of work. He eventually inherited his farm from his parents, Clara and Titu, at the age of 23, following an incident with a tractor that caused them both to tragically die. Clara from injuries sustained attempting to haul it out of a bog. Titu from injuries sustained attempting to carry Clara's coffin to its final resting place.
He continued to work on his farm with little incident until he was 29 when, after a particularly prosperous year, he decided he had earned a break. He decided to take a hiking holiday in Colorado, and intended to climb Black Mesa. Unfortunately, the phrasebook that he bought himself proved to be completely useless, and after informing many passers by that his hovercraft was full of eels he decided to use the little english that he did know to simply follow what few signs he could. He eventually arrived at a tram station and boarded the train that was waiting for him.
The real Gordon Freeman, who was in fact the spitting image of Petre Carp, had, the day before, agreed to lend his lawnmower to his colleague, Barney. That morning, in carrying it to his car, he tripped over one of the cables and was knocked unconscious, rendering him unable to call in sick that day until after the events of the day.
The entire game then follows a confused Romanian man as he attempts to understand the english that everyone keeps yelling at him, and staring blankly as people tried to convey meaning to him by pointing and just letting him follow.
He continued to work on his farm with little incident until he was 29 when, after a particularly prosperous year, he decided he had earned a break. He decided to take a hiking holiday in Colorado, and intended to climb Black Mesa. Unfortunately, the phrasebook that he bought himself proved to be completely useless, and after informing many passers by that his hovercraft was full of eels he decided to use the little english that he did know to simply follow what few signs he could. He eventually arrived at a tram station and boarded the train that was waiting for him.
The real Gordon Freeman, who was in fact the spitting image of Petre Carp, had, the day before, agreed to lend his lawnmower to his colleague, Barney. That morning, in carrying it to his car, he tripped over one of the cables and was knocked unconscious, rendering him unable to call in sick that day until after the events of the day.
The entire game then follows a confused Romanian man as he attempts to understand the english that everyone keeps yelling at him, and staring blankly as people tried to convey meaning to him by pointing and just letting him follow.
In that case, Greek women and the God Aphrodite must be really big fans of small penises. XDAssassinJoe said:
On Topic:
Masterchief from Halo is a buck-toothed homosexual.
The pyro is a woman.
The heavy WAS a woman.
(Yeah, try getting that image out of your nightmares tonight.)
The heavy WAS a woman.
(Yeah, try getting that image out of your nightmares tonight.)
When he is alone, Commander Shephard takes the model ships out of the case in his/her cabin and has imaginary dogfights with them........with accompanying sound effects ;IE, Pew Pew Pew Whoosh!
Dr. Wily loves singing songs by Bachman-Turner Overdrive at karaoke bars. He ironically funds his world domination schemes through his side business as Auto's gimp. It pays staggeringly well. No word yet on where Auto gets the money, though I would speculate that he is a savvy investor in mutual funds.
Ezio Auditore sits down for his mamma's dolmino dish every sunday, and has a collection of stuffed animals.
He also likes to tap dance.
He also likes to tap dance.
I can totally see him doing that, and then grabbing his Ashely action figure, and making love to her...........GrizzlerBorno said:
OT: Monkey from Enslaved is actually a wanted pedophile, and uses the name "Monkey" to get kids to trust him.